


Love is Forever (Your Forever is All That I Need)

by Bbaegi



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Romance, Slice of Life, but it doesn't go farther than that and it's not between the main pairing, slight dubcon for a kiss, the angst is minor tho, this is so fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 15:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 76,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11762934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bbaegi/pseuds/Bbaegi
Summary: "I’ve never felt forever when I kissed someone. Have you?" Baekhyun heard himself whisper, voice as gentle as the first notes of a lullaby meant to tame a child’s fear and lure them into a gentle slumber filled with nothing but sweet melodies to dance around with instead.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt Code: #YFBD-044 
> 
> Author's note: Dear Prompter, this is probably not what you expected at all as it was not what I expected at all either, I’m not sure how this turned out to be so long. I did my best though and I’m sure it’s probably lacking in some aspects but I hope you’ll like it nonetheless. Writing this was an adventure that I really enjoyed and somehow it made Baeksoo grow on me even more! Lovely Admins, thank you for your hard work in creating this fest, for always being patient with me, and replying to my sometimes really stupid questions. Thanks to A for supporting me through this. The song used towards the end of the story is Sleeping With Sirens’ James Dean & Audrey Hepburn (the acoustic version) which is also where the title comes from. I also apologize if there are inaccuracies around the whole music major side, I tried doing my best. I hope you’ll like it!

"That’s a really big and bright addition to your collection, Baekhyun. I’m rather impressed."

 

Plumping down on his seat, Baekhyun couldn’t help but throw his very obnoxious best friend, also known as Jongdae, a light, irritated glare that only darkened a bit when it made the other’s already wide and mocking grin widen, giving him an odd resemblance to that cat Baekhyun used to see whenever he watched Alice in Wonderland when he was younger. He had never liked that ugly cat and maybe that was a sign telling him to get rid of this very unhealthy and irritating friendship he had going on with Jongdae for almost three years now.

 

"Very funny, Jongdae. Too bad the only people who’d laugh at your jokes aren’t here," he replied drily even if he wasn’t even actually angry. He had gotten used to Jongdae anyway and he never took it personally. "You know, people who share your sense of humor. Which means literally no one."

 

What he couldn’t get used to, however, was that sting that he’d always, _always,_ feel on his cheek whenever a pretty girl would pull him aside to have a word with him before classes started. He supposed that he should have gotten used to it a long time ago, it wasn’t actually as painful as sharing a friendship with Jongdae anyway, but each time, Baekhyun couldn’t help but wince as soon as a hand collided with his cheek in a harsh slap that sometimes gave him a headache for the rest of the day. It wasn’t even surprising anymore, he always braced himself up for the pain as soon as they’d start speaking and he already knew that rejection would be the only answer he’d be able to give them.

 

He could still feel his cheek burning and he knew that there probably was the bright red mark of a hand there, his assumption confirmed by Jongdae’s words. He could already feel the amused stares and snickering he’d be on the receiving end of as soon as the rest of his friends would catch a glimpse of it so he hoped that it would at least fade away by the end of this class, he wasn’t in the mood to deal with any of it right now. Siyeon’s words had been harsh after all and even if Baekhyun knew that she had pronounced them in a moment of anger and pain, he couldn't help but still hear their echoes in his head. 

 

He supposed that he deserved it, being called _a_ _selfish prick_ , _a stupid fuckboy_ , or worse, _a manipulative asshole_ wasn’t anything new to him but each time, he couldn’t ignore the slight pang of pain that hit his heart as hard as the hand that always hit his cheek. Sometimes, he wondered what he actually did to deserve this and if you were to ask him, there was absolutely _nothing_ wrong he did but this had already been the third time this month and Baekhyun couldn’t help but think that  maybe he did deserve the usual treatment he got after turning down a confession or the spontaneous advances that some people took too far, leaving him no choice but to actually set things straight between them. 

 

Nonetheless, he had the right to reject a confession, didn’t he? He couldn’t force himself to have feelings towards people he just wasn’t attracted to. He wasn’t the kind of person to take advantage of people’s feelings to pull them into his bed for a single night and then disappear in the morning either. This wasn’t high school anymore and he had thought that girls suddenly crying when faced with rejection before turning angry when he apologized and slapping him right after insulting him in a rather disturbing way would be left behind but it was almost like a curse that followed him around and Baekhyun had no idea why that happened.

 

"You know, maybe this wouldn’t happen if you just stopped being so kind, warmhearted, overly friendly, and incredibly smily with everyone you met."

 

Good thing he had Jongdae around to shed some light into his painful life, he couldn’t help but think bitterly, throwing another tired look at his friend who suddenly had enumerated all of this with a mock look of admiration, as if those words had been uttered to him by someone else too many times in the past. It probably was the case. 

 

"I’m pretty sure this would be worse if I just suddenly turned into an asshole," he grumbled under his breath, choosing to pay more attention to the pen and the notebook he had just retrieved from his backpack instead of looking at the amused smile on his best friend’s face. "Not that people don’t already think I’m an asshole. A manipulative one, according to Siyeon."

 

"Oh, so it it was Siyeon this time," Jongdae hummed, gaze locked down onto his phone as his thumbs drummed over the screen. He hoped that whoever Jongdae was texting would one day slap him so that Baekhyun would be the one taking pleasure from his friend’s pain at least once in his life. 

 

"Who did you think it was?" he snorted, gaze trailing over his surroundings.

 

The classroom was rather full today, much fuller than last week at least, everyone already settled on their chosen spot with only one or two chairs left vacant which was a surprising sight in a university classroom. People usually ditched this class for a reason or another, mostly because it took place on a Wednesday and who would even want to go to class in the middle of the week after already two full days of school?

 

At least, that was what Baekhyun thought people had in mind when skipping this class since he was part of those who had perfect attendance for this particular class, not having missed it a single time ever since the start of the semester. He used to think that having started their second year in this establishment would actually push people to attend their classes more and work harder but he supposed that most university students simply liked their freedom and sleeping in every morning, if possible. Baekhyun wasn’t one of them and that was probably because he just loved his major and especially this class, it had always been one that he looked forward to because no matter how long the teacher babbled about composition, rhythms, or arrangements, Baekhyun would simply sit there and drink in everything that she’d say as if it was the most beautiful melody he had ever had the pleasure of hearing. Maybe that was because he heard lots of melodies throughout the day, both as a music major and someone who was simply in love with music, and enjoyed every single one of them.

 

"I don’t know, I thought it might be Joohyun," Jongdae replied once he was done typing his message, unfortunately giving his full attention to Baekhyun once again.

 

"Why would it be Joohyun?" he asked, eyebrows pulled into a confused frown.

 

"She got the hots for you," Jongdae deadpanned, raising an eyebrow.

 

"She doesn’t," Baekhyun frowned harder.

 

"See, this is why people call you a manipulative asshole," Jongdae laughed, loudly and obnoxiously enough for Baekhyun’s ears to be in more pain than his cheek. Good thing Mrs. Choi was always late to her classes.

 

"Why?" Baekhyun sighed, out of habit since they already had this conversation before.

 

"You’re kind of manipulative, Baekhyun."

 

"What the hell, I’m not," he protested, hating that appellation and knowing for sure that he certainly wasn’t the kind of person everyone seemed to think he was.

 

"Okay maybe not," Jongdae shrugged. "But you just give people lots of false hope and I know you surprisingly don’t do it on purpose but that’s the thing, other people don’t know about that. You’re just kind and friendly and all but you’re a bit too much of everything and you tend to make people feel special because you’re too kind and flirty, you don’t know when to stop and people misunderstand it. They think you’re into them and when you actually tell them you’re not, you get slapped in the face. You kinda deserve it."

 

"It’s not like I’m trying to evilly seduce people on purpose, I just like being kind to everyone and making people smile, Jongdae. That shouldn’t be a bad thing," he groaned, running a hand through his already tousled silver hair. He had dyed it just last week and despite Jongdae childishly mocking him for being a grandpa, the result had been far from disappointing. On the contrary, he had gotten a lot of praises for it and he knew that the color suited him a lot.

 

Somewhere deep inside of him, he knew that Jongdae might be just a little right but to Baekhyun, it didn’t exactly make sense. He never actually did anything to give false hope to anyone, he never intended to break anyone’s heart even if that seemed to be all he managed to do. Maybe he did have too many people on his contacts’ list and maybe he liked to keep himself updated on everyone’s life, causing him to often message people just to ask them how their day had been, but that didn’t make him manipulative. Maybe he also liked to tell silly and embarrassing jokes just to make someone whose day had been terrible smile but that didn’t mean he gave anyone false hope either. And maybe he also did take it too far sometimes, being unable to refuse things and always finding himself out with people on what he never considered more than a friendly date, maybe he was just a tad bit too flirty too but that didn’t mean he actually enjoyed causing pain to people he actually appreciated.

 

However, maybe he was the only one to think that way.

 

"Fine, then continue getting slapped once a week. I’m not complaining, I enjoy the show," Jongdae snorted, shaking his head and rolling his eyes all at once in that particular way that always gave Baekhyun the urge to just part his lips and insult him to vent out his frustration. Jongdae wouldn't mind anyway, they were close enough for him to know that Baekhyun never actually meant whatever mean things slipped out of his mouth.

 

Before he could say anything, though, the door swung open and the small ball full of energy and slyness that was Mrs. Choi barged into the room, a wide smile stretched on her bright red lips as her presence alone was enough to quiet everyone down.

 

"Good morning, everyone," she chirped, letting her bag fall on her desk as she settled there, getting her stuff out.

 

A chorus of grunts and laughter answered her and she laughed a bit. People rarely came to her class but that didn’t mean her pleasant personality wasn’t appreciated either. She was a friendly teacher that still somehow managed to keep her lessons strict and rather demanding.

 

"Nice to see you too," she snorted before clapping her hands once as if to say that the class was really starting now. Twenty minutes late, but still starting. "I’m glad to see so many of you today because, as you probably all know, I will give you your final project for this year. We’ll start with the instructions to get it out of the way before focusing on the lesson."

 

At those words, Baekhyun instantly perked up, listening to her attentively in order not to miss a single detail even if the whole class already knew what to expect.

 

"You’re going to partner up with one of your classmates and I’m going to give you until the end of the semester, which is in a bit less than two months, to compose an entire song," she started, her gaze going over the whole classroom to make sure that she had everyone’s attention and that no one was confused by her basic request. "It can be any kind of song, you can work it out with your partner and I’ll accept any genre as long as it has a melody and the lyrics to go with it. I don’t particularly enjoy listening to lyrics about drugs, expensive cars, and naked women so keep that in mind," she added, her eyes playfully narrowing and her smile widening when general laughter resonated in the classroom. "The ideal would it be for it to be around three minutes long but it can be shorter or longer. Any question?"

 

A hand raised somewhere in the first ranks and Baekhyun’s gaze was drawn to it along with everyone else. He recognized Sulhee, a girl he had never been too familiar with as she was the kind of person not to focus on anything else but her classes which was surprising considering they were all Music majors and probably had less academical lives than most students. He had always found her nice and the way his smile always seemed to dust her cheeks pink was adorable.

 

"Are you going to assign partners?" she asked and instantly, groans of protest rose from the rest of the students.

 

Mrs. Choi simply rolled her eyes, as if used to this reaction.

 

"I don’t want to suddenly become your least favorite teacher," she shook her head, that light smile returning to her strawberry-colored lips. "You can find your own partner to make it easy for yourself but I wouldn’t suggest pairing up with your best friend either, you probably already make songs as a hobby together. The point of this project is to see how to work out a song when you and your partner might be totally different people so choose wisely! I’ll give you ten minutes to find your partner and talk a bit before we’ll focus on the lesson."

 

As soon as she was done talking, Baekhyun nodded to himself, gaze traveling around his classmates as he hummed under his breath, almost out of habit. He had been expecting this project since the beginning of the semester and now that they were finally allowed to work on it, he couldn’t help but feel tingles of excitement running through his whole body. He loved composing and he might not be the best at it yet, but he was willing to sacrifice hours of sleep just to hole himself up in his room and let his fingers dance over the keyboard that his parents had gifted him long ago.

 

"Who are you gonna pair up with?" Jongdae asked, pulling him out of his thoughts.

 

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, turning to his best friend. "Aren’t we going to pair up?"

 

Jongdae gave him an apologetic smile and  the excited gleam in Baekhyun’s eyes dimmed down a notch.

 

"I already promised Sooyoung that we would do it together a long time ago," the other explained and Baekhyun simply shrugged, not letting it disappoint him since who he partnered up with didn’t really matter as long as he could make music. 

 

He was used to composing with Jongdae anyway and maybe that was why his first thought had been to work on this project together since they always had so much fun when making music together. Their styles and their tastes had always matched, Jongdae always loved composing happy, joyful music and Baekhyun was used to his slightly funky style. It didn’t matter, however, Baekhyun could easily adapt to anyone else as well and he knew how hard Jongdae was working on getting Sooyoung to see him under a different light, wanting to shade the image of a nice, funny friend she had of him for something more. He still felt a tiny bitter taste in his mouth since Jongdae was basically dumping him to hit on a pretty girl instead but he supposed he shouldn’t be too surprised by it.

 

"It’s okay, I’ll find someone else. Just don’t scare Sooyoung away with your weird jokes," he teased the other, pleased when Jongdae’s features instantly took in the usual shape they had whenever he was about to whine like a five-year old.

 

"She likes my humor," he protested, voice higher than usual before he easily changed the subject and grinned at Baekhyun. "Who are you gonna partner up with then? There’s a few people looking at you and waiting to get their hearts broken."

 

Baekhyun chanced another glance around with his best friend’s words and indeed met the eyes of a few people he had been friendly with in the past, most of them looking at him with a hopeful glint. All of them were the people who usually messaged him at random times to start up a long conversation and Baekhyun found his lips curving into a light smile but he could feel discomfort bubbling in his stomach. Jongdae was right, if he partnered up with some of those people, he knew how this was going to end for him, he would either collect tears, a slap, or a worse reputation at the end of this project and Baekhyun couldn’t afford that kind of distraction when this was important for his grades. If Jongdae had had this conversation with him so many times, the other was probably not entirely wrong. Maybe he did make it too easy for others to develop those feelings for him but it wasn’t exactly his fault and as selfish as that was, Baekhyun didn’t want to spend this project worrying about his attitude with his partner and whether they would end up falling in love with him or not. 

 

He immediately looked away from them, worrying his lower lip between his teeth as he tried coming up with an easy solution that would both benefit him and his partner. He was tired of breaking hearts and even if he tried telling himself that it never was his fault, it still hurt a bit to end up bringing nothing but pain to people when the only thing he had wanted was to make them smile. He looked at Jongdae again, hoping that the latter would see the distress in his eyes and maybe partner up with him instead of the girl he was desperately trying to hit on.

 

However, this was Jongdae and Baekhyun wasn’t even surprised when he looked at him with that same wide, amused smile while wiggling his eyebrows obnoxiously.

 

"Taehyun’s walking towards us right now. I told you he still had a thing for you too," Jongdae whispered, failing at it when his voice still came out louder than average.

 

Baekhyun’s eyes widened a bit at his words, however, and he felt his whole body tensing up as he forced himself not to look behind him, knowing that if he met Taehyun’s gaze, it would be over for him. He had been trying to avoid the latter for weeks now and usually, he managed to do it despite sharing a few classes with him but this was the perfect occasion for the other to corner him properly. It wasn’t that he disliked Taehyun or anything of that sort, on the contrary, he was a nice guy and that was the exact reason why Baekhyun had not been able to refuse when Taehyun had asked him out on a date two months ago. The other had merely assumed that they were dating after their one date had gone well but Baekhyun hadn’t shared the same opinion despite not having been able to break his heart since each time he tried to say something about it, Taehyun simply told him how happy he was to be together with him and that Baekhyun was the best thing to ever happen to him.

 

Despite the discomfort he felt for this whole relationship, Baekhyun had allowed it to go on for a month before finally breaking it off for good with kind words and a nice smile that he had hoped would make things easier for Taehyun. The latter had reacted rather badly after that, blaming Baekhyun when the latter told him that he had simply gotten ahead of himself and, knowing that Taehyun was kind of right, he hadn’t even defended himself too much. He had been the one at fault anyway, he should’ve told Taehyun off before things had gotten too far and the latter had agreed on that single fact enough to leave Baekhyun alone. It hadn’t lasted longer than a week, however, and Taehyun had found him again to ask for another chance and apologize for blaming everything on Baekhyun.

 

That time, Baekhyun had tried to be firm and open with him but Taehyun simply refused to understand and claimed that he would be better this time and that he’d make Baekhyun happier than anyone else. He could already imagine Taehyun pleading him to partner up together and he had a really nice, soothing singing voice, but Baekhyun couldn’t afford to have a partner who’d probably focus more on him than on the work at hand so he immediately shot up on his feet, surprising Jongdae who looked up at him in a mix between confusion and jubilation.

 

"Stall him," he pleaded, hoping that Jongdae would understand how serious he was being. "Do something. I can’t partner up with him, Jongdae," he shook his head, already pulling away from his seat in an attempt to put more distance between Taehyun and him.

 

"Who are you even gonna partner up with then?" Jongdae asked behind him but Baekhyun didn’t even look back at him, knowing that Taehyun was already too close to him.

 

He simply weaved through the seats and the few people who were on their feet as well, looking for partners or already discussing the project together after finding one. His gaze traced over the familiar faces he had shared this classroom with since the beginning of the semester but whoever he deemed suitable to be his partner had already one of their own and the only people who met his gaze had big sparkles in their eyes. Baekhyun knew those sparkles too well, it meant danger for him.

 

He simply smiled at them awkwardly, stopping in the middle of the room to properly look around. Who could he even partner up with when whoever Baekhyun spoke to seemed to develop ulterior motives after a few friendly conversations? Maybe a boy would be less inclined to be attracted to him that way. He pulled his lips into a tight line as he tried locating someone who looked safe enough but he was distracted when he heard Taehyun calling his name behind him with that characteristic gentle and cheesy tone that sent shivers of discomfort down his spine. He felt panic ridiculously growing on him and he directed his gaze to the back of the room, zeroing in on a lone figure still properly seated and calm amongst the busy buzzing of the whole classroom. 

 

It was a familiar face that Baekhyun had caught a glimpse of a few times through the semester but this was probably the only class they shared and Baekhyun had never actually tried engaging a conversation with the guy he didn’t even actually remember the name of. The only thing he knew about the other was that he was alone most of the time, not because he was weird, creepy, or anything you could hear about in high school hallways, but because he didn’t seem to like hanging out with people too much. Baekhyun never saw him at any party and that was saying something because he attended _every_ party thrown by someone he was familiar with on campus. He didn’t seem to have a partner either, judging by the way he was frowning down at his phone, thumb lazily swiping over the screen as if he didn’t even care about what was happening around him. He probably didn’t, he looked like someone who didn’t care about much, who didn’t smile a lot either, and who probably wouldn’t even mind ending up with no partner at all. The few times he had seen him, the only thought popping up in Baekhyun’s mind was that this guy was probably his complete opposite.

 

He sunk his teeth into his lower lip harder as something suddenly seemed to push him forward to step closer to the guy. He chanced a glance over his shoulder and when his gaze accidentally met Taehyun’s, the latter grinned at him so brightly Baekhyun felt his eyes hurt in a really unpleasant way. That was the last straw and before he even realized it, his feet dragged him to the safest option for him at the moment. That guy was probably the only person Baekhyun wouldn’t have to worry about when it came to feelings and unnecessary ulterior motives so he naturally curved his lips into his usual warm and friendly smile as he approached him.

 

As if sensing his presence, the guy looked up from his phone, still with the same frown, his gaze landing on Baekhyun who didn’t let himself be intimidated by it, however, as he was determined to save himself just this once.

 

"Hi!" he grinned, plopping down on the empty seat next to the boy who now looked at him with a confused gaze, glancing around as if wondering whether Baekhyun was talking to someone other than him. 

 

From a closer look, he actually didn’t look that intimidating, especially now that the frown was traded for a surprised expression. Baekhyun observed him, hoping that his name would magically pop into his mind. Was it Kyungil? Jungsoo? He didn’t remember but a single glance to his left was enough for him to see Taehyun frowning as he stood a few steps away from them, obviously displeased after having seen Baekhyun settling next to the boy.

 

When he looked back at his, hopefully, new partner, Baekhyun saw him looking at Taehyun too, with much less worry than Baekhyun probably had in his gaze. His confusion suddenly dimmed down when he looked back at Baekhyun, his features morphing back to the usual blank expression Baekhyun always saw him sporting whenever he’d catch a glimpse of him in the school hallways. He didn’t even reply to Baekhyun, simply raised a bushy eyebrow as if to silently question him, as if he was a bit weirded out by this interaction and he wasn’t sure Baekhyun was worth a reply beside a small nod of his head.

 

And it probably was weird for Baekhyun to suddenly talk to him, in the other’s eyes, since they hadn’t exchanged a single word at all until this exact moment but Baekhyun gave him his best smile, hoping that the other wouldn’t reject his offer. There didn’t seem to be anyone else willing to pair up with him anyway so his best choice would be Baekhyun, both because it would save him the trouble of looking for a partner and because Baekhyun couldn’t deny the fact that he was one of the most talented students in this class.

 

It was odd that no one even tried taking a step towards this guy, though, Baekhyun didn’t really see why he was always alone. It wasn’t like he was particularly mean, someone who rarely pronounced a word to other people couldn’t be mean to them, and he wasn’t weird or scary either. On the contrary, from a  closer look, he actually looked nice and his features, his big eyes, his round face, and the beautiful shape of his lips all came together to form a rather handsome face. However, Baekhyun supposed you couldn’t judge someone by their appearance and he hoped that this guy actually was nice and not a trap Baekhyun would give himself away to while trying to run away from danger.

 

"You don’t have a partner either, right?" he asked, still with the same gentle smile.

 

"You don’t have a partner?" were his first words to Baekhyun and despite the confusion that they carried to his ears, he found himself surprised by the unexpected depth of the other’s voice.

 

It was a low voice, deep but not scratchy, loud but not noisy, soothing but not monotone, and Baekhyun couldn’t help but fall silent for a few seconds as he let it echo in his head. It was the perfect voice for a ballad, a lullaby, or story-telling in front of a fireplace in a cold, winter night. For a split second, he couldn’t help but think that it was such a shame that this was the first time he heard that voice after a whole semester of sharing this class with this guy. 

 

"Is that surprising?" Baekhyun chuckled softly after finally being able to get a grip of himself, gaze trailing over the other’s features as he tried familiarizing himself with him and maybe catching a glimpse of his thoughts through his expression.

 

That was difficult though, there was no smile on the other’s face but there was no sign of any negative feelings either, almost as if he wasn’t sure what to make out of this situation and was simply observing Baekhyun back with the same intent to figure him out. Baekhyun wasn’t used to people acting this way with him, observing him so intently as if they weren’t sure what was going through his head when he knew that most of the time, he was someone whose feelings you could read on his face. It felt odd to be observed so curiously and almost confusingly instead of being given a knowing look by people who thought they knew him too well.

 

"I guess not?" the other finally mumbled and Baekhyun could feel that he had chosen his words carefully and that what had gone through his head had probably been completely different, judging by the way those three small words had sounded more like a question than a statement.

 

For a split second, hesitation loomed over his mind, peeking its head behind the wall of confidence that Baekhyun usually had built around himself. What if this was a mistake? Nothing could guarantee that this guy wanted to partner up with him, not when Baekhyun’s reputation had both its good and bad sides. He might be known as a friendly, nice guy but that didn’t stop every single person he had rejected until now to spread bad words about him and he knew it, he knew that for each person that called him a nice guy, a second person probably replied with something similar to what Siyeon had slapped him in the face with earlier. What if this guy had heard about all those rumors and didn’t want to associate himself with someone like Baekhyun? Not that he was a bad person, he knew that he wasn’t but that was the problem, only _he_ and a few close friends seemed to know.

 

This was his only way of escaping Taehyun’s loving claws, however, and Baekhyun had never been against the idea of making new friends with anyone who looked nice enough. This guy might have uttered less than ten words to him but he didn’t look intimidating or mean at all and Baekhyun wouldn’t mind making a new friend, someone who might not be from his usual close group of friends but who still wouldn’t judge him according to the rumors and ask of him difficult things to do after misunderstanding him.

 

Maybe he could even learn more about this intriguing boy who looked at him with a mix of wariness and confusion swirling in his dark orbs.

 

"So," he cleared his throat and the boy didn’t even flinch, as if he had been waiting for Baekhyun to explain what he was doing here. He had heard from Jongdae once that there was this lone, intimidating boy who shared their major and Baekhyun couldn’t help but wonder if he had been talking about the boy in front of him right now. It couldn’t be, he wasn’t really intimidating. Someone who looked at you as if each of your words would matter couldn’t be intimidating. "Do you want to pair up with me for the project?"

 

As soon as that question had left his lips, Baekhyun saw the other’s eyebrow twitch a bit in a faint sign of surprise and he immediately braced himself up for rejection, the smile slowly sliding off his face. It felt odd, at that moment, to be at the end of rejection instead of the one imposing it on others.

 

However, he spoke again and Baekhyun found himself as confused as the other boy probably felt.

 

"You want to pair up with me?" he asked in a tone that suggested it didn’t make sense to him.

 

Instantly, Baekhyun felt his whole body relaxing a bit. This wasn’t a bad reaction, it was mere confusion and Baekhyun could understand that. His sudden request might have come off as unexpected and he probably would have reacted the same way.

 

"I mean, if you’re going to reply to each of my questions with one of your own, maybe this is actually a bad idea," he couldn’t help but say, letting his voice take in the gentle but teasing tone it often morphed into now that he knew the other wouldn’t outright reject him. And if he did, it wouldn’t matter, Baekhyun could always find someone else to partner up with, even if he would do it reluctantly.

 

That seemed to finally wake the other boy up and he looked at Baekhyun for a few blank seconds before letting out a quiet, low chuckle that rose between them with a surprised lilt. It sounded nice, really nice, like the kind of chuckle you could hear at the beginning of a song depicting a young, innocent, and heart-fluttering love. He wondered how the other’s voice sounded when he sang.

 

"I’m sorry, I just didn’t expect that," he finally replied and Baekhyun felt himself leaning closer to him the slightest bit, drawn in by the soothing voice caressing his ears. It sounded so nice, he could almost taste it in the air the way he used to taste the delicious scent of the chocolate his grandmother loved to melt by her own means whenever she wanted to make a chocolate cake for him when he was nothing but a child who’d whine at his beloved grandmother for sweets and biscuits.

 

"It’s alright, I guess it is kind of random," Baekhyun admitted with a casual shrug of his shoulders.

 

"It is," the other agreed before taking the time to observe Baekhyun for a few seconds during which he seemed to make up his mind just at the right time since Baekhyun was about to urge him for a reply. "It would be a pleasure to partner up with you."

 

Those words felt as refreshing as the cold whisper of the wind against his nape on a scorching hot summer afternoon and Baekhyun instantly relaxed, more relieved than he would have expected himself to be.

 

"Great!" he grinned, glancing at his left to see that Taehyun wasn’t there anymore, his relief only enhanced by that fact. "I’m sure we’ll make something amazing together…" he trailed off, inwardly cursing himself for still not being able to remember the boy’s name.

 

The other seemed to know his problem, his lips twitching up into the tiniest of smiles.

 

"Kyungsoo," he simply said.

 

"Kyungsoo," Baekhyun repeated, testing the name on his tongue. It was a nice name, one that started strong only to end in a gentle whisper. "I think our names would look great together next to our perfect, full mark," he said softly, lips curved into a playful smile before he remembered that he hadn’t introduced himself yet. "I’m Baekhyun, by the way."

 

"I know," the other replied but before Baekhyun had the occasion to feel any kind of regret towards the fact that if Kyungsoo knew his name, it also meant that he probably knew what was usually said about him around here, he curved his lips into the first small but real smile he gave Baekhyun. "I see you’re confident."

 

"I am, I don’t settle for anything but the best," he chuckled softly, gaze trailing over the other’s features out of habit. He had a feeling Kyungsoo was close to the best there was in this classroom and he hoped that he wouldn’t be let down.

 

Before the other had the occasion to give any sort of reaction to Baekhyun’s words, Mrs. Choi’s chirpy voice put an end to the overall noise draped over the classroom as she called everyone back to their seats for the actual lesson to finally start. Baekhyun felt disappointment filling him up since they had no time to actually talk about the project and they had just started engaging into a real conversation made of questions and answers instead of questions from both sides.

 

This lesson was important, however, and Baekhyun would be the last person to complain about listening to their teacher’s knowledge about everything that had to do with composition so he turned back to Kyungsoo who met his gaze, already looking at him.

 

"Too bad we don’t have time to actually talk about the project but I think it would be nice to start as soon as possible," he said, hoping that the other would share the same opinion.

 

"You’re right, it would be better to start now instead of leaving everything to the last second," the other hummed softly, his words tugging Baekhyun’s lips into a pleased smile.

 

"Do you have time to meet up later today?" he asked, standing up from where he had been settled next to Kyungsoo.

 

"When are you free?" he asked and Baekhyun couldn’t help but smile a bit. It really seemed to be habit of his to reply to questions with ones of his own and surprisingly, that wasn’t really annoying for now.

 

"My last class ends right at noon."

 

"I’m free then. Where would you like to meet?"

 

"Maybe we could just meet up in the cafeteria and get something to eat as well. I won’t be useful to you with an empty stomach," Baekhyun chuckled softly.

 

"See you later then," Kyungsoo nodded, giving him a wider smile.

 

His smile, his _real_ smile was rather unexpected, the pinkish curve of his lips forming a perfectly adorable heart that Baekhyun found himself observing for a second before he nodded at the other and finally moved to regain his original spot, next to Jongdae who was giving him curious looks from where he still was seated. It was a nice smile. Kyungsoo was nice.

 

"You found a partner?" Jongdae immediately asked him as soon as Baekhyun settled on his usual spot next to him, the curve of his eyebrows dripping with curiosity.

 

"Yep," Baekhyun smiled, popping the word out of his lips as he glanced around, catching a glimpse of Taehyun’s disappointed expression as he walked back to his seat, Minho talking to him with an excited smile that contrasted with the other’s expression as they walked together. Taehyun’s eyes met his for a second and Baekhyun immediately looked away, feeling a bit bad about avoiding the other this way but knowing that sometimes, he really had to learn how to please himself instead of everyone else. "It’s a guy named Kyungsoo, maybe you know him."

 

"Kyungsoo?" Jongdae raised an eyebrow, glancing behind them over his shoulder to probably locate the other. "How did you even end up with him?"

 

"Why?" Baekhyun frowned at the notes of surprise in his best friend’s voice. "You know him?"

 

"Not that much, I’ve just seen him here and there," the other shrugged. "He’s usually quiet and alone most of the time, that’s like the complete opposite of you."

 

"But he’s not… mean or weird or anything, right?" he asked, hesitation suddenly filling him up again when faced with Jongdae’s reaction.

 

"Nah, I don’t think he is. I’m just scared that he’ll end up dumping you because your personalities clash too much and you’re probably gonna make him crazy," Jongdae shrugged and he had the nerve to pull his features into a mock worried expression.

 

"I chose him because he’s the complete opposite of _you,_ " he stressed, reminding his best friend that they were quite similar when it came to their personality and their rather loud behavior. "I need a break from you."

 

"Are you breaking up with me, babe?" the other asked, amused desperation seeping into his voice as he grabbed Baekhyun’s hand and squeezed harder than necessary.

 

"Yeah, so you can go marry Sooyoung or something," Baekhyun snorted, shaking his head at his best friend’s antics and snatching his hand away from his deathly grip. Maybe he was still a bit upset about Jongdae ditching him as soon as the occasion to get closer with a pretty girl had showed itself and it might be petty but Baekhyun didn’t care when Jongdae could be twice as petty as he was being now.

 

However, the mention of Sooyoung seemed to melt Jongdae away and he let out an enamored sigh, finally leaving Baekhyun alone to daydream about the poor girl instead. Baekhyun wasn’t sure whether he should hope for his best friend to finally land someone great in his life or if he should worry about Sooyoung ruining her own life with Jongdae. Probably the latter.

 

The teacher finally started her lesson once everyone was settled properly and Baekhyun instantly ignored everything Jongdae could say, giving his whole attention to the woman as she spoke with wide hand gestures, the passion she held for this subject obvious in the wide smile she had as her gaze traveled through the whole classroom. Baekhyun had the same little flame of passion in his heart so he focused on each word leaving the woman’s lips, only throwing a glance over his shoulder once after a few minutes. He caught a glimpse of Kyungsoo entirely focused on the woman as well, a small frown of concentration pulling his eyebrows closer as one of his hands seemingly worked on taking notes of everything.

 

Maybe this wouldn’t be as difficult as he thought it would be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By the end of his classes for the day, Baekhyun had almost forgotten that they had set a place to meet up and discuss the project as he had tried focusing as much as he could to the millions of things his teachers tried shoving into his brain. He didn’t really mind though, he was used to it anyway and if Baekhyun had been able to go through nearly two whole years without having to give up, there was no reason for him to complain too much now either.

 

It had been a rather uneventful morning, he hadn’t encountered anyone prone to causing him trouble and despite having arrived to his last class late because he had been held by a friend who wanted to discuss a few things concerning a game they both loved to play together, the teacher hadn’t said anything to him. He was almost exhausted by the end of it, however, as he had never been an early riser and his day had started way too early and slightly painfully as well.

 

"When will you be done?" Jongdae asked as they walked out of the classroom and weaved their way through the crowd with the intent of reaching their shared apartment as soon as possible. Baekhyun was starving and the mere thought of being able to go home and order pizza was enough to make his mouth water more than necessary.

 

"Done with what?" he asked, turning to the other with confusion.

 

"You said you were going to meet that Kyungsoo guy for your project," Jongdae furrowed his eyebrows, his tone filled with accusation now that it was obvious Baekhyun had forgotten about that.

 

"Oh, right," he remembered, lighting up his phone to check the time. He bit his lip when seeing that it was a little past noon which meant that he would be a bit late.

 

"Are you really going to irritate your partner right on your first meeting about the project?" Jongdae snorted next to him, causing Baekhyun to frown at him as he stopped walking in the middle of the hallway.

 

"I’m not too late!" he defended himself.

 

"He doesn’t seem like the casual kind of person," Jongdae retorted, shaking his head in mock disappointment as he eyed the other.

 

"What does that even mean?" he asked in confusion, not really understanding what his best friend meant. Kyungsoo didn’t look like the uptight kind of person either, he was nice even, he hadn’t even questioned Baekhyun too much despite obviously not being sure about this whole partnering up matter. Before even having the occasion to dwell on the matter, he realized that if he stood there and continued arguing about that with Jongdae, it would only worsen his case. "Anyway, I’ll see you later at home, I can’t make him wait for too long," he then hastily added, giving the other a small wave as he turned around and walked to the opposite side, heading towards the cafeteria.

 

Now that he thought about it, it might have been a bit weird to ask Kyungsoo to meet at the cafeteria to talk about their project but it had been more of an offer to get to know the other than to actually start working on the project. They still had two months left and sometimes, two months could be an awfully short time to make a song but Baekhyun knew that if they could make a good pair, then two months would be more than enough for them to wrap everything up in time. It all came down to how compatible they would be and even if a small voice in his head whispered to him that he could only blame himself if this project ended up being a disaster, he still hoped that they would make a good team.

 

The only way to know that would be to learn more about Kyungsoo and either way, Baekhyun didn’t like staying a stranger with people he’d have to frequent often which might be the reason why so many people misunderstood him, now that he thought about it. It didn’t matter though, Kyungsoo didn’t seem to be that kind of person and Baekhyun genuinely just wanted to get to know him before they delved on the more serious side of this project. It would be infinitely more pleasant to work on it if they knew enough about each other to enjoy spending time together while making a song that would count as half of their final grade for this semester.

 

However, Kyungsoo might reconsider the whole thing if he made him wait for too long so he rushed towards the cafeteria which was unfortunately at the other side of the campus. His steps were rushed and he was careful not to collide with anyone, smiling back at the few acquaintances who greeted him near the building he just had class in, and anxiously checking the time on his phone every few seconds even if he wasn’t even too late. He just didn’t want to make a bad impression on Kyungsoo right from the start, Baekhyun never made any bad impressions to anyone and he didn’t want the other to be a first in that area.

 

He finally reached the cafeteria in less than five minutes, his chest heaving a bit when he pushed the door of the building open and walked towards the cafeteria that seemed to be crowded. It didn’t come off as a surprise, this place was always crowded with starving students and Baekhyun was currently one of them so he once again carefully advanced into the room, gaze traveling around him in an attempt to spot the person who was hopefully still waiting for him. It was difficult to spot Kyungsoo at first but when he managed to catch a glimpse of him waiting at a table in the far left corner of the room, alone and gaze once again focused on his phone, relief flooded him at once, making it a bit easier for him to breath properly. 

 

He hadn’t left and he didn’t look particularly angry either, the frown on his face was the same one he had this morning when Baekhyun had caught him right when he was focused on his phone. He supposed it was a frown of concentration and guided by the churning of hunger in his stomach, Baekhyun chose to line up to get some food instead of directly joining him. He had caught a glimpse of a wrapped up sandwich on the table anyway so Kyungsoo was probably waiting for him so they could start eating together and the queue wasn’t that long either since most people were lining up for something other than a sandwich.

 

After collecting his lunch for today and asking the familiar female worker about her day like he did every time he came by to buy a sandwich here, Baekhyun finally made his way towards Kyungsoo, a light smile lingering on his lips as he put the sandwich and his backpack on the table, seemingly startling Kyungsoo who looked up at him with wide eyes for a few seconds before his dark orbs filled up with recognition.

 

"Hey," Baekhyun greeted him as he sat down across him, pulling his lips into a more apologetic smile. "I’m sorry, I’m a bit late. Did you wait here for long?"

 

Kyungsoo shook his head, putting his phone down to give his whole attention to Baekhyun who was pleased by the gesture. Jongdae had the annoying habit of talking to him while scrolling through his social media feed or typing a message and that always ticked him off a bit so this felt nice for a change.

 

"Not really, I have class in an hour anyway so I would have waited here either way," Kyungsoo shrugged.

 

"Well, I hope you didn’t starve yourself too much while waiting for me then because I personally am about to die of hunger," Baekhyun chuckled softly, relieved that the other wasn’t upset at him for being a bit late. 

 

"I’m alright," Kyungsoo replied, observing him as if he was still trying to figure him out. It still felt odd but Baekhyun didn’t comment on it, letting his gaze drop to his sandwich as he unwrapped it.

 

That seemed to be the cue for Kyungsoo who did the same as him, a slightly awkward silence falling over them for a few seconds before Baekhyun felt the urge to break it off and looked at the other again. He had small, chubby hands that fumbled with the packaging of his sandwich for a few seconds before he finally managed to unwrap it, the frown that had settled on his features melting off at the sight of his sandwich.

 

"We have the same sandwich," Baekhyun noted absentmindedly as he brought his own up to take a bite that he savored, chewing on it slowly and letting the delicious taste of chicken and curry sauce invade his mouth.

 

"Oh, right," Kyungsoo said and at this point, Baekhyun wasn’t really sure whether the other was awkward by nature, since it didn’t exactly sound like it, or if he just didn’t know what to reply.

 

However, Baekhyun was used to awkward people and it didn’t matter to him.

 

"I guess we have similar taste then, I always get this sandwich whenever I come here," he added, hoping that it would urge the other to engage into an actual conversation with him.

 

"I do too," Kyungsoo hummed, waiting to swallow what he had in his mouth to continue speaking, unlike Baekhyun who didn’t really care much about that aspect of his manners and always earned a disgusted glare from Jongdae whenever they were eating. "I just really like it and I haven’t found a place that makes these sandwiches as good as they do here."

 

"Me neither," Baekhyun grinned, pleased to find that they were actually more similar than what he or even Jongdae had thought. "There’s this place a few blocks away from campus that makes the same sandwiches actually and they’re not as delicious but still similar. I always go there during break if I crave these, they’re decent."

 

"I never heard about that place but seeing as you’ve eaten almost half of your sandwich in a single bite and find their sandwiches similar to these ones, I guess I could trust you," Kyungsoo said and Baekhyun found himself freezing right when he was about to take another bite of his sandwich when he saw the smile that stretched on his lips.

 

It was an unfamiliar one, different from the faint or slightly friendly one he had given Baekhyun until now. The curve of his lips was a bit wider and didn’t look forced at all, on the contrary it was a natural smile that was dusted in the corners with the same amusement that swirled in the other’s wide, dark orbs. For the first time since the very first word they had exchanged this morning, Kyungsoo didn’t look like he was forcing himself to act nice and Baekhyun felt an odd kind of relief seeping into his mind at the prospect.

 

He got a grip of himself rather quickly, however, playfully narrowing his eyes at the other.

 

"I wasn’t kidding when I told you I was about to die of hunger."

 

"It’s alright, you can eat. A dead partner would be a useless one," Kyungsoo shrugged, still with the same faintly amused smile before he finally turned to his own sandwich and took another bite.

 

"Are you saying you wouldn’t mind me starving if you didn’t need me for this project?" he couldn’t help but ask, his smile turning as playful as the other’s had been. He didn’t have to hold himself back and act a certain formal way now that he knew Kyungsoo wasn’t as uptight as Jongdae made him out to be. He was surprisingly not shy either since his cheeks didn’t even redden at Baekhyun’s teasing words when the latter knew many people who would have reacted that way to this playful conversation. That only made him more interesting and more difficult to actually figure out in Baekhyun’s eyes.

 

"Of course not," Kyungsoo replied seriously but before Baekhyun even had the occasion to rejoice, he added something else. "I’d make sure you stayed alive at least until you showed me that sandwich place."

 

"I suddenly don’t remember where that place is," Baekhyun playfully huffed, taking another bite and making sure not to to let the sauce drip all over his fingers.

 

Kyungsoo simply let out another low, quiet chuckle and Baekhyun wondered if everything he did was quiet. Even as he had been teasing Baekhyun, his voice had been quiet, almost serious, and it was odd, Baekhyun wasn’t really used to having quiet people around him. It felt a bit soothing, oddly. Or maybe he only felt soothed because the hunger destroying his stomach was slowly dimming down.

 

Either way, they both simply focused on eating in silence again and while Kyungsoo’s gaze traveled around the room, no doubt observing whatever was happening on every singe table surrounding them, Baekhyun found his gaze landing on the other again to observe him. The smile had vanished from his features and now that he could take a good and closer look at him, Baekhyun could kind of understand what Jongdae had meant about them being complete opposites. Kyungsoo was quiet, Baekhyun was the most accurate embodiment of noise, Kyungsoo was calm while Baekhyun had a hard time preventing himself from drumming on the surface of the table just to _move,_ Kyungsoo observed people as if he saw through them and unfolded their whole story in the back of his eyelids with each blink whereas Baekhyun had thrown a single glance around the room when he had stepped in to check whether he had any acquaintances close by before focusing on his food, and lastly, Kyungsoo’s features were relaxed, pulled into a neutral expression while Baekhyun’s smile was almost permanently etched on his face.

 

They were different, he supposed, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t get along. They had known each other for half a day and had spent less than half an hour conversing but Baekhyun could already see himself being friends with this boy and the latter didn’t look as uncomfortable as he had this morning when Baekhyun had asked him to pair up with him either. He had thought it might be shyness or discomfort but now, after the slightly playful comment Kyungsoo had made about his eating, he figured out that maybe Kyungsoo just took some time to warm up to people and show them his real self. Baekhyun hoped the other would warm up to him quickly, he couldn’t help but feel curious about him.

 

It was definitely odd but Baekhyun was known to be able to charm and make friends with anyone alive on this planet so he supposed there wasn’t really anything odd about this either.

 

"So, what kind of music do you listen to?" Baekhyun finally broke the silence again after five long minutes of simply eating during which he felt as if he was about to explode. Keeping himself silent for five minutes was already a huge fit for him.

 

"What kind of music I listen to?" Kyungsoo once again replied to his question with a question of his own even if he had simply repeated Baekhyun’s and the latter felt a light smile forming on his lips as he nodded. It was an endearing habit and Baekhyun wondered whether he always did that or if it was brought up by the fact that they were both still strangers to each other. 

 

"Yeah, we can start thinking about what genre would suit us the best if we get an idea of what the other likes," he explained, letting his sandwich down for a second to fully pay attention to the other.

 

"Well, I don’t really like songs based on who sings them," Kyungsoo started, humming softly as his gaze met Baekhyun’s. "If I were to name a few artists, I guess I mostly like listening to Sam Smith, The Weeknd, maybe Lana Del Rey, and Adele," he listed off, furrowing his eyebrows as if this was a serious matter and he had to completely focus on not getting his answer wrong or not forgetting anyone. "I just listen to anything as long as it suits my tastes, honestly."

 

"You look like the ballad kind of person," Baekhyun blurted out without even noticing, biting his lower lip afterwards as that had been supposed to be nothing but a silent thought.

 

"Do I?" Kyungsoo asked in surprise before letting Baekhyun hear that low, short chuckle again. It sounded and felt like the warm wafts of air caressing your face when you stood right in front of a campfire. "I actually am. I mostly listen to ballads and I just really like R&B as well."

 

Baekhyun wasn’t surprised by that, everything about Kyungsoo seemed soothing, slow, and maybe a little soulful with a few crumbles of something oddly akin to sadness clinging to his aura. However, he couldn’t deny the fact that he felt a bit disappointed since that was probably what their main difference would be. If there was something that Baekhyun didn’t like as much as any other genre, it would be ballads and all kinds of song that were made to be listened to late at night while laying alone on your bed and staring at the ceiling while listing all your shortcomings at once, usually concerning your love life. Baekhyun simply couldn’t relate to that kind of song, he just didn’t really understand the concept of listening to the same break up songs over and over again with the same lyrics but depicted differently over sorrowful melodies. 

 

He was more of the kind of person who listened to mainstream music just to keep himself updated on the latest trends in the music industry and the only songs he liked to replay over and over again all had a nice, dynamic melody that seemed to wrap all around his body, morphing into the strings of the puppet he suddenly became in the hands of the music. He simply related more to songs about happiness, friendship, summer trips, and all kinds of crazy but bright lyrics. Maybe that was because he didn’t like sadness in itself and why would you listen to sad songs when you were already sad instead of finding a bright, happy song that would lift you up and make you forget all about the negative sides of your life? That was exactly the kind of song Baekhyun wanted to make. 

 

The kind of song that had little notes dancing in the air and seeping into your brain to take control over your body and pull you into doing things you didn’t even know you could do. The kind of song that would wrap all around you like a warm blanket, whispering into your ears not to be sad, not to let the sorrow squeeze your heart between its claws. The kind of song that you would blast as loud as possible in your happiest moments, the kind of song that would become a companion, a friend that would always be with you both to witness the making of your happiest memories and to craft the melody accompanying them each time you’d play them in your head like you favorite movie. Baekhyun just wanted to make songs that would bring a smile on people’s face instead of tears in their eyes.

 

However, he didn’t let his disappointment show on his features. It wasn’t even actual disappointment, he wasn’t the kind of person to judge people based on their musical taste and all the artists Kyungsoo had just listed were amazing singers as well. He would, in no way, downgrade them when he could admit that they all had nice songs, just not all of them were the kind of songs that he’d listen to on repeat. 

 

"What kind of song are you planning to make for the project then?" he couldn’t help but ask, hoping that the worry suddenly settling over him wasn’t heard in his voice.

 

"Actually, I had something like a ballad in mind," Kyungsoo started and with the way his lips curved into a light smile, it was obvious that he had thought about this before. "Not something overwhelming, nor something overly depressing either. Just something soothing, like a song you’d listen to at night."

 

"I see," Baekhyun hummed softly, fighting the urge to scrunch his nose up at the other’s description of what he had in mind. "What about the lyrics? What theme would you like to go for?"

 

"I haven’t thought about it that much but since we’re going to finish that project for the end of the semester, when summer is near, I was thinking of something about a lonely summer night," he started, features relaxing as his words carried the confidence of someone who was used to talking about this subject. "Something that could make you feel like everyone around is having fun but you don’t really want to do anything but watch the stars in the clear night sky which you can’t even do because watching the stars alone is kind of sad and you don’t have anyone to keep you company. However, the stars would shine even brighter for you, as if trying to make you forget your loneliness by making you focus on their beauty instead, and you’d just try thinking back on everything you did for the past year and what you should do this summer."

 

"That’s depressing," Baekhyun couldn’t help but blurt out, eyebrows furrowed even if the way the other had phrased it did make it sound beautiful. He could almost imagine the gentle melody accompanying the sorrowful story told by Kyungsoo’s soothing, gentle voice. It made it sound appealing but it was not the kind of song that Baekhyun would listen to so he had no reason to make such a song either. 

 

"Well, it would be a sad song but a lot of people might be able to connect to it," Kyungsoo shrugged, unfazed.

 

"I didn’t really have a sad song in mind," Baekhyun gently informed the other.

 

"What kind of song did you have in mind then?" Kyungsoo asked and Baekhyun felt relieved by the fact that the other was willing to discuss things with him instead of getting upset as soon as their opinions seemed to clash.

 

"I’d like to do more of a bright song," he grinned, both of their sandwiches laying forgotten on the table since they were focused on the conversation rather than the food.

 

"A bright song?" Kyungsoo repeated once again, a clear sign of his discomfort. 

 

"Yeah! We could keep the summer theme if you’d like but why sing about loneliness and the lack of love in your life when you could sing about the bright sun, a summer afternoon spent lazing around with your friends to tighten your bonds and the freedom brought by the lack of actual responsibilities? Everyone would relate to that as well," he argued, a smile spreading on his lips at the mere thought of working on that kind of song. 

 

"You don’t expect me to write a song about getting high in the back of an expensive car with a girl curled on your lap, do you?" Kyungsoo merely snorted, causing a slight spark of irritation to gleam in Baekhyun’s mind for a second.

 

"If that’s the only thing summer means to you, I’d say you need to get better friends. We can keep it innocent with cheesy ice cream dates with your high school sweetheart instead of weed, if you want," Baekhyun raised a brow, hoping his playful tone lightened the weight of his words.

 

However, it looked like he didn’t really have to worry since all his reply did was pull Kyungsoo’s lips into an amused smile and when he leaned back against his seat and crossed his arms over his chest, Baekhyun wasn’t sure whether the other was mocking him or not.

 

His next reply was enough for him to know that the other was indeed mocking him the slightest bit.

 

"If all you did with your high school sweetheart was ice cream dates, I’d say you need dating advice," the other said, still holding himself confidently across Baekhyun as he observed the latter, amusement still dusted over his light smile.

 

Baekhyun felt ticked off by that remark since deep down, he knew that he _might_ actually need some dating advice so he simply shook his head and didn’t let the other get to him. He hadn’t expected their conversation to take this turn. He hadn’t expected Kyungsoo to end up being so confident and something between teasing and mocking with him. Baekhyun was usually the one to tease others and make them feel flustered even if it happened unconsciously most of the time.

 

"Either way, I don’t like sad songs," he simply said, mimicking the other by crossing his arms over his chest and raising an eyebrow defiantly. If Kyungsoo could mock his tastes then Baekhyun could  outright refuse his suggestion.

 

"Calling ballads and any similar genre of music ‘sad songs’ is kind of downgrading."

 

"Calling bright songs lame and generalizing all of them with the bunch of songs about weed and sex you hear on the radio is kind of downgrading too," he replied in a beat.

 

"I never called them lame," Kyungsoo retorted, amusement growing in his voice and in his smile. 

 

"That’s what you were trying to say, at least," he retorted, oddly without any kind of resent despite having been almost mocked by the other. 

 

People usually were never honest with Baekhyun, never really opposing to anything he said from fear of upsetting him and losing all chances of getting closer to him so this was a bit of a new sensation for him, and an oddly interesting one furthermore. He had also not taken Kyungsoo for the playful kind even if he wasn’t even sure whether the other was actually serious or if he was exaggerating things just to spite him for his own amusement. Either way, this unexpected side of him was interesting to observe.

 

"I’m just kinda saddened by the fact that you can’t enjoy the billions of ballads there are in this world," Kyungsoo shrugged, seemingly deciding to drop the argument.

 

That was the problem, Baekhyun thought. There were billions of ballads in the world and all of them were about mourning a broken relationship, missing your other half, and being depressed over the lack of love in your life. How could someone listen to that kind of song all day? He felt gloomy by the mere thought of it and, not wanting to argue with his partner over their project from the very first day, he tried turning the discussion towards a less serious path.

 

"Are you the kind of person to listen to sad songs even while eating your birthday cake?" he suddenly asked the other, mirth melodiously flowing through his voice and caressing Kyungsoo, tickling him in a way that painted a light smile on his lips once again.

 

"Is it that obvious?" the other asked, not self-consciously nor hesitatingly, just curiously.

 

"Kinda," Baekhyun shrugged before bringing his sandwich back up to his lips, fingers trying to avoid the sauce that had dripped from the garnishing.

 

"Well, you look like the kind of person who’d worship cute girl group songs and blast mainstream music while showering."

 

Kyungsoo’s words weren’t insulting in any way, not at all, but Baekhyun still found himself surprised by them, or rather, by the teasing tone with which they were once again pronounced, as if Kyungsoo didn’t even consider the fact that he might actually be right.

 

"You’re actually kind of right," Baekhyun simply said with a casual shrug, amusement seeping into him with the way Kyungsoo froze and raised an eyebrow.

 

"Seriously?"

 

"I like to update myself on the latest trends in the music industry," he simply shrugged again, shoving the last bit of his sandwich into his mouth and taking his sweet time to chew on it to savor the delicious taste a last time.

 

"That sounds like an excuse,"  the other chuckled softly and Baekhyun would have expected him to be judging but surprisingly, once his surprise had faded, he made no mocking comments about it.

 

"It’s not," he defended himself, moving to rummage through his bag to look for the small pack of gummy bears he had gotten earlier this morning as a kind of desert for his lunch.

 

"You’re going to eat candy after eating that greasy sandwich?" Kyungsoo immediately commented as he finished up his own sandwich, eyebrows furrowed in disapproval as he eyed the candy pack.

 

"You’re eating the same greasy sandwich," Baekhyun snorted softly, struggling a bit to open up the pack but smiling victoriously as soon as he gained access to the little bear-shaped sweets. "Do you want some?"

 

"No, thanks," Kyungsoo smiled a bit, shaking his head as he wiped his fingers after finishing his sandwich.

 

Baekhyun simply shrugged, popping two colorful bears into his mouth at once and chewing leisurely as he observed the other lighting up his phone to check the time. They were probably running out of time since Kyungsoo had said he had class after this and they hadn’t even started seriously on the project but he didn’t even mind, this had been a rather interesting first meeting and at least, he had gotten to know his partner.

 

"You have curry sauce on your chin," Kyungsoo suddenly said after a few seconds of silence, back to leaning into his chair and crossing his arms over his chest, his gaze lost somewhere around Baekhyun’s lips.

 

The latter froze at those words and brought a hand up to his chin, brushing his fingers over his skin to catch the remnant of sauce.

 

"Where?"

 

"On the other side," Kyungsoo said, gesturing to Baekhyun’s left with a small nod of his head. "It’s been there for a while, maybe it’s dried up."

 

"It’s been there for a while and you’re telling me about it just now?" Baekhyun playfully narrowed his eyes at the other but still followed his instructions, bringing his fingers to the other side to brush his skin but unfortunately still not feeling anything under his fingertips. He wasn’t actually upset about it, a small stain of sauce on his skin wasn’t much to worry about.

 

"I made you keep it because it helped me not take you seriously as you claimed to dislike ballads," Kyungsoo shrugged casually, that same amused but small smile tugging one corner of his lips up the slightest bit.

 

Baekhyun simply snorted before letting his hand drop away from his chin, thinking that he had probably wiped the bit of sauce away from his skin. However, as he was about to pop another jelly bear into his mouth, Kyungsoo suddenly clicked his tongue, shaking his head a bit as he grabbed the last bare tissue resting in front of him on the table and leaned forward. Baekhyun froze in confusion as the other leaned towards him, looking at him with slightly widened eyes as Kyungsoo gently brushed the tissue against his chin and pulled away the next second, the tissue stained with a faint trace of sauce as he properly settled back on his seat.

 

"There you go," he simply said, letting the tissue drop on the table.

 

Baekhyun looked at him for a silent second, still surprised by the other’s gesture since he had seemed to enjoy seeing Baekhyun struggle about that tiny matter and didn’t seem to be the kind of person to initiate contact with everyone as he mostly kept his arms crossed over his chest most of the time as if he feared brushing against someone else. Kyungsoo seemed to be unexpectedly different than the way he seemed to be at first glance and once again, Baekhyun found himself wondering what kind of person he actually was and how many sides did he still keep hidden from everyone else.

 

"Thanks," he simply said, turning his attention back to his gummy bears.

 

"You’re different than how I thought you’d be," Kyungsoo suddenly said after a few seconds of silence, pulling Baekhyun’s gaze back on him.

 

"Is that a good thing?" he chuckled softly.

 

"I guess," the other shrugged nonchalantly.

 

"How am I then?" Baekhyun asked, voice filled with curiosity and slightly muffled as he still was chewing on a small colorful bear while replying.

 

"Kinda like a kid," Kyungsoo said without hesitating, gaze trailing over him as if he was trying to figure Baekhyun out even now.

 

The latter couldn’t help but laugh a bit in surprise, not having expected such a thing. When people said something similar, they usually followed it by upsetting words and probably some kind of light physical violence.

 

"Do you have a thing for insulting people on your first meeting?" he couldn’t help but ask, still amused by this whole ordeal.

 

"It wasn’t an insult, just a statement," Kyungsoo shrugged again and he seemed to do that often as well. Maybe another habit of his.

 

"Explain your statement then," Baekhyun asked, half curious and half amused.

 

"Well," Kyungsoo hummed for a few seconds, observing Baekhyun who gave him a wide smile, victorious when the other’s lips twitched into a small smile as well. "You keep smiling every two seconds, you eat really messily, you also carried a pack of gummy bears in your bag all morning, and you only listen to bright songs," he then listed, nodding as if to confirm his own words.

 

Baekhyun couldn’t even deny that all of this did kind of sound like something a child would do and it wasn’t even the first time someone told him that he could act childishly sometimes but besides Jongdae, it usually was meant to be something hurtful. This was different. This was so odd.

 

"Well, this child is your project partner so you better treat him well," he playfully threatened the other, eyes narrowed and pointer finger threateningly directed towards Kyungsoo to add to his probably ridiculous appearance.

 

However, the other didn’t seem to be fazed the least bit by that and he simply looked at Baekhyun blankly for a few seconds only for laughter to suddenly bubble out of his mouth, popping right against Baekhyun and infecting him to join in quickly. He didn’t even know why he was laughing, it just felt nice to be able to do it and Kyungsoo’s laughter did sound like one of those ballads he probably liked, quiet, low, and soothing, but oddly, it didn’t make Baekhyun feel gloomy. On the contrary, it felt nice, like one of those bright songs he liked to blast through his whole apartment until Jongdae screamed at him to tone it down.

 

It took them a few seconds to calm down but once they did, Baekhyun felt his chest lighter than it had been when he had stepped into campus this morning and had been welcomed by tears and a slap after unintentionally breaking someone’s heart. It felt nice. 

 

Kyungsoo shook his head at him, amusement still sparkling in his eyes and Baekhyun simply shrugged, observing the other who once again checked the time on his phone and pursed his lips.

 

"Time to be a good student again?" Baekhyun asked the other, a smile lingering on his lips.

 

"Yeah, I should go now or else I’ll end up being late," Kyungsoo nodded, already gathering his stuff and crunching the discarded wrapping of his sandwich into a small ball.

 

Baekhyun was surprised by the small hint of disappointment peeking into his mind as the other stood up, finding himself wishing that he didn't have to go to class so that he could observe him a little more and try figuring him out. He didn’t voice it out though, it would be a weird thing to do.

 

"Good luck then," he simply smiled. "Thank you for making time for us to talk about the project too."

 

"We barely even talked about it," the other shrugged softly, features relaxing into that usual blank expression he seemed to carry around often.

 

"There’s no rush, we’ll talk again," Baekhyun reassured him, watching as Kyungsoo’s lips quirked up into a light smile as he lingered there, in front of him, giving him a last observing look.

 

"See you, then," he finally said, only turning around to leave once Baekhyun gave him a last smile coupled with a nod of his head.

 

He watched as the other slowly walked away, unable to tear his gaze away from him even if he still had a few colorful and cute gummy bears waiting for his attention. 

 

Kyungsoo was nice, nicer than expected and everything Jongdae had told him about him turned out to be a mere exaggeration. Kyungsoo had been rather friendly with him, even going as far as teasing him despite everyone knowing him as an uptight and serious person. Baekhyun hadn’t felt that kind of thing coming from him at all, only a bit of wariness at first maybe, but that was quickly wiped away with friendliness and something halfway between familiarity and difference between them. 

 

There had also been something that he noticed only a few seconds later when thinking back about it, something between them that he couldn’t actually put a name on. Something that felt odd but not weird, something that Baekhyun had never really felt before, and something that made him hope he would have more time to figure Kyungsoo out on their next meeting.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Days blended together and despite their meeting lingering in Baekhyun’s mind from time to time, they unfortunately had no time to meet up and talk about it again since Baekhyun came to notice that he really had no way to see Kyungsoo at all besides their one shared class as there was literally no other class they shared despite having the same major. He barely even saw him in the hallways or outside the buildings within the campus and that was saying something since, for some reason, his eyes had started trailing around him more often than usual as he looked for something without even knowing what it was until the thought that he really never saw Kyungsoo popped into his mind along with the disappointment that oddly seemed to be a recurrent part of that remark.

 

He didn’t even know why he looked for the other so often when there wasn’t even any rush concerning their project, they still had two months to work on it and despite having clashed on what to exactly do about it when they had discussed it in the cafeteria, Baekhyun knew that they would eventually end up settling it. Maybe he just wanted to see how Kyungsoo was doing since it had been almost a week since they had shared their time together in the cafeteria and they hadn’t been in contact at all since then. Baekhyun had noticed only a few hours after Kyungsoo had left, when he was already lazing around in his bed at home, that they hadn’t exchanged their numbers and that he had no other way to contact the other. Not that he particularly wanted to contact him.

 

He would have simply liked to discuss the project with him more and maybe just ask how he was doing because they were friends now, weren’t they? Baekhyun liked updating himself on how each of his friends were doing and Kyungsoo was now part of his life, even if they had met only once and spent most of the meeting teasing each other and maybe mocking each other’s musical taste. He still felt surprised by all of that, he hadn’t thought that he would get along with Kyungsoo that well even if he knew the other would probably not hate him either since people usually never disliked him until Baekhyun told them that they were misunderstanding a few things.

 

Kyungsoo was different from everyone he had met until today, however, and Baekhyun didn’t even know how to actually word that out. He didn’t hang on every single word leaving Baekhyun’s mouth, he didn’t give him overly-happy smiles whenever he saw him, he didn’t contradict himself just because Baekhyun had said that he didn’t share the same opinion, and when they had been eating together, he hadn’t barely eaten anything to show Baekhyun that he cared about his appearance, and he didn’t even care about Baekhyun’s appearance either since he had left him with sauce staining his chin for god knows how long that day. Jongdae usually was the only person who acted that way with him but it was different, Jongdae wasn’t a stranger, he had been Baekhyun’s roommate since the very first day of his university life and they might have met on their senior year in high school but they had never been close until they had found themselves sharing a room in the campus’ dorm. He had never even approached Baekhyun with intentions exceeding friendship and that had been enough for Baekhyun to naturally move out with him and share an actual apartment a few blocks away from campus now.

 

Perhaps Kyungsoo would end up being a really nice friend the way Jongdae was, Baekhyun wouldn’t oppose to that because despite having so many friends, none of them made him feel as comfortable as Jongdae did and maybe having a second person like that in his life would make it all the better. Moreover, Kyungsoo was interesting. He had told Baekhyun that he had expected him to be different and Baekhyun hadn’t returned those words but they had still been in his head at that exact moment. He had expected him to be serious and uptight the way Jongdae had described him to be, maybe a bit shy since he was barely seen around and Baekhyun never caught him at any of the parties he attended on a regular basis but Kyungsoo had been nothing but interesting, a bit playful too, and he had even played along with Baekhyun, teasing him instead of blushing at every mirthful word leaving his mouth. 

 

He was also handsome and Baekhyun had noticed that only because Kyungsoo didn’t seem to be the kind of person to let his feelings on plain sight over his features and Baekhyun had had to observing him to be able to understand what each of his words actually meant. He was different and it was odd, but Baekhyun found himself thinking back on it more often that he would’ve expected.

 

"Are you looking for someone?"

 

The gentle voice next to him suddenly pulled him out of his thoughts and his gaze was pulled back to its owner, landing on Joohyun’s soft and beautiful features as she looked up at him curiously, with disappointment dusted over the corner of her lips.

 

"Sorry, I was just looking for a friend since I haven’t seen him in a long time," he replied with an apologetic smile that soothed her, not exactly lying but not telling the whole truth either.

 

He had indeed been unconsciously looking around him with the hope of catching a glimpse of Kyungsoo but he had also drifted off during her very uninteresting story about what had happened to her yesterday when she had gone out shopping. It wasn’t that he found it boring since it was nice of her to update him about her life as they hadn’t seen each other in two weeks but Joohyun was standing too close to him, smiling too wide, and her hand occasionally rested on his arm whenever she laughed at one of his silly jokes.

 

It made him happy to know she was smiling this way since she had been sick for the past days and that had been the reason why she hadn’t been around too much but Baekhyun was starting to pay mind to Jongdae’s words about her having feelings for him and Baekhyun didn’t want Joohyun to end up like many of those girls who cried in front of him and broke his heart a little bit after he broke theirs without any ill intention. He actually appreciated Joohyun, they had known each other since last year as they always coincidentally shared a few classes together and she was a nice friend who had helped him with a few assignments when needed, a really kind and funny girl he liked conversing with even if she always drifted to the newest lipstick she had gotten a few days ago. He didn’t want to break her heart but he knew that distancing himself from her so suddenly would probably sadden her just as much so he wasn’t even sure what to do.

 

He simply settled on continuing to stay with her until her next class started, he knew she didn’t like to wait alone in front of the building.

 

"Is that friend more interesting than me?" she asked, a playful smile on her lips even if her words were tainted with a light sheen of accusation.

 

He couldn’t help but feel bad at that when remembering how excited and happy she had been to run into him on her way to class ten minutes ago so he simply gave her a playful smile, shaking his head.

 

"I don’t think I’ve ever met someone as interesting to look at as you," he whispered, lowering his voice as if he were sharing a secret with her.

 

The disappointment on her face was quickly swept away by a wide, shy smile and a faint blush on her pale cheeks so he smiled a bit wider, glad that he had been able to make her smile. She was beautiful and actually really interesting to look at since she was the kind of person to wear her feelings on her face, just like Baekhyun was. She was one of the most beautiful girls he had ever met but that was it, Baekhyun simply liked observing her and talking to her, nothing else.

 

"Is that something you tell everyone you meet?" she then asked, teasingly nudging him with her elbow.

 

"Why would I?" he chuckled softly even if her words left a sour taste in his mouth. "Is that the new lipstick you bought?" he then asked to change the subject, gaze dropping to her painted lips.

 

"It is!" she perked up, glad that he was finally paying proper attention to her. Giving him a wide smile, she tilted her head a bit and leaned a tad closer to him. "Do you like it?"

 

"Of course, you’d suit anything," Baekhyun smiled at her, not even lying since Joohyun was pretty enough to really suit anything she’d wear both on her body and on her face.

 

Her smile widened and she gave him a light, embarrassed chuckle but before Baekhyun had the occasion to regret his words, he caught a familiar form from the corner of his eye and he immediately was drawn to it, turning to his left to look at it properly. 

 

He didn’t know why but as soon as he saw Kyungsoo walking out of the building they were standing right in front of, he felt his lips stretching into a smile and took a few seconds to observe him, his ears barely catching on Joohyun’s comments about what lipstick color suited her the most as his gaze followed Kyungsoo. It had been almost a week since they had last seen each other and Baekhyun never really expected people to change in such a short amount of time but he still couldn’t help but think to himself that nothing had really changed about Kyungsoo. He stopped for a few seconds in front of the building, adjusting the strap of his messenger bag on his shoulder and raising his phone closer to his face, almost too close as if he had trouble seeing it properly from a further distance. His gaze still didn’t waver away from the screen, his thumb still lazily swiping it, and his eyebrows were still furrowed the slightest bit in what Baekhyun now knew to be concentration since he seemed to carry that look on his face whenever he looked at his phone for longer than two seconds. 

 

He wasn’t dressed too differently from that day in the cafeteria either, his shirt was black and plain save for the brand’s small logo on the sleeve but it looked more fitting than the one he had worn a week ago had looked. It was a bit tight on his chest, but not too much, just enough for Baekhyun to be able to see that despite not having the bulkiest of bodies, Kyungsoo still seemed to work out a bit and the short sleeves of his shirt also allowed him to see that his arms weren’t scrawny either. That was only a small detail, however, so Baekhyun trailed his gaze down to see that he was sporting the same denim jeans he had that day before looking back up to his face. Kyungsoo didn’t seem to have noticed him, however, and he obviously wasn’t planning to stay there either since the next second, he locked his phone with a press of his finger on the button at the side of the device before he looked forward again and started walking away.

 

The sight was enough to plant a small and odd gleam of panic into Baekhyun’s mind and before even realizing what he was doing, he turned to Joohyun and gave her an apologetic smile, cutting her off mid-sentence.

 

"I just saw my friend and I have something important to ask to him so I’ll leave you for now, I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you!" he promised her as he already started walking away before having the occasion to linger on her disappointed and surprised expression or even letting her say something else to him.

 

Without losing another second, he followed behind Kyungsoo, steps rushed to catch up to him as he called his name to prevent him from disappearing somewhere between the school’s useless amount of buildings. Baekhyun surprised himself with this attitude and the joy that shimmered in his veins and gave him the energy to catch up to Kyungsoo quickly when the latter stopped in his tracks and turned around to look at him, features filled with just as much surprise.

 

"Hey," Baekhyun greeted him once he had caught up to him and stood in front of him properly, slightly breathless.

 

Kyungsoo replied to his wide smile with a gentle snort that wasn’t even filled with mockery but mere amusement, a sound that seemed to have escaped him unwillingly as he properly turned to Baekhyun, observing him.

 

"You really are a kid," he started, causing Baekhyun to furrow his eyebrows a bit as he looked at the faint but definitely amused smile on his lips. "You didn’t have to run to me when I was already waiting for you without moving anywhere."

 

"I was just trying to catch up to you, you walk quite fast despite having short legs," Baekhyun said without hesitation, lips curling into a teasing smile that turned a little victorious when Kyungsoo’s smile vanished and was replaced by a slightly irritated expression.

 

Baekhyun usually didn’t act so comfortable with strangers, he was friendly with everyone he met but he usually avoided making jokes that could offend someone he didn’t know much about since he didn’t want to hurt anyone. However, it was different with Kyungsoo. They had spent a little more than an hour together a week ago but he didn’t really feel like a stranger, on the contrary, Baekhyun felt really comfortable around him. It was nice not to have to choose his words carefully and just be himself without fearing anything since Kyungsoo didn’t seem to be the kind of person to judge others easily. It was odd but he felt a kind of familiarity towards the other despite their differences.

 

"Your legs are just as short as mine," Kyungsoo grumbled.

 

"That makes a common point that could lead us to a really nice friendship. We can cry about our short height together, if you’d like," Baekhyun shrugged, watching as the slight irritation in Kyungsoo’s eyes was blown away by gentle swirls of amusement that seemed to dance in his eyes like leaves caught in the arms of the wind.

 

"Only kids cry about their short height, you can do that alone," the other raised an eyebrow. "Do it while running around and eating a whole pack of gummy bears."

 

Kyungsoo had an odd way of being playful, Baekhyun realized then. You could probably not understand it if you were the kind of person to easily get offended because nothing but Kyungsoo’s eyes could let you know that his harsh words weren’t actually serious. The other really didn’t wear his emotions on his face and somehow, Baekhyun found it interesting. It was amusing to have to watch every single quirk of Kyungsoo’s face just to understand what was going through his head.

 

"True, I guess your height doesn’t really put you at a disadvantage," he hummed softly, choosing to ignore Kyungsoo’s small jab to him in order to observe him from a closer distance now that hey were standing across from each other. "You still look great."

 

"Do I?" Kyungsoo asked and the amusement was suddenly gone from his eyes, features morphing into that blank expression again as if he wasn’t sure what to feel.

 

"Yeah, why are you looking at me so weirdly?" Baekhyun chucked softly, wondering if he had offended the other in any way. "This shirt looks great on you, I think you suit black really well but I guess that’s also because I haven’t seen you wear anything but black shirts for now. But _this_ shirt fits you. You also have a nice nonchalant smile and I usually don’t like short hair on people, but I guess it looks alright on you since it’s not too short either," he listed as he observed the other, not even realizing what he was saying until he focused back on the small glint of surprise in Kyungsoo’s eyes.

 

Only then did he realize that he had just randomly started complimenting Kyungsoo and listing everything he found nice about his appearance and he froze for a second, not sure why he had just done that. Baekhyun had the habit, and maybe the fault, of blurting out whatever was on his mind without thinking about its consequences so it shouldn’t really come as a surprise to him but he wasn’t sure where those thoughts had even come from. Kyungsoo was handsome though, Baekhyun wouldn’t deny the fact that he was attractive even if he tried not to focus on that too much and maybe that was the reason why his gaze had been searching around for Kyungsoo this whole week.

 

However, the other didn’t seem to take him seriously and that shouldn’t come as a surprise either but Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel something sting when Kyungsoo simply chuckled softly, as if merely amused by Baekhyun’s attitude. There was no reason for him to be upset by that and he knew it so he simply tried focusing on the way the other’s laughter still sounded like a lullaby. It was odd, Baekhyun had never really liked lullabies.

 

"That’s really nice of you but if you’re fishing for compliments back, I don’t have time for this," the other replied and once again, it sounded kind of mean but Baekhyun managed to catch on the teasing edge of his smile.

 

"I’m not sure you even know how to compliment someone," Baekhyun playfully snorted, eyes narrowing into teasing slits.

 

"So you’re saying you really want me to praise you," Kyungsoo hummed softly, the soft playful sound tickling Baekhyun’s ears and seeping into his mind, twirling around with soft melodies, slow symphonies that formed the gentlest song he had ever had in his head.

 

He wondered if a song could make your chest feel oddly ticklish.

 

"If you want to make me happy, you should tell me we’ll be working on a bight song instead of praising me. That would be the fastest way to my heart for now," he grinned, his smile tainted with mirth as he leaned closer to Kyungsoo whose gaze immediately dimmed down, losing the playful gleam as he huffed softly.

 

"We’re not going to make a bright song," the other said, gaze finally trailing away from Baekhyun to observe his surroundings. Baekhyun kept himself from scrunching his nose in disappointment but he didn’t know why that feeling suddenly surged through him when Kyungsoo looked away from him. It was probably because of the final tone with which his words had been pronounced.

 

"We’re not making a song about broken hearts and loneliness either then," Baekhyun retorted, the disappointment helping him finally pull seriousness into those words.

 

Kyungsoo seemed to have heard the upset lilts of his words, his gaze trailing back to Baekhyun the next second. Maybe Baekhyun shouldn’t have breached that topic again but that was the only reason why they had actually met and it was a serious project, one they needed to start on as soon as possible.

 

"Why the hell do you hate songs about broken hearts and loneliness so much?" Kyungsoo muttered under his breath but Baekhyun managed to catch it, frowning further.

 

"Why do you even want to make that kind of song so much?" he questioned the other, not even in an accusing way, he was genuinely curious about it. He had thought back on it a few times the past few days and he really didn’t understand why Kyungsoo was so adamant on making a sad song. Baekhyun could _maybe_ understand why one would listen to depressing songs but he couldn’t grasp the other’s willingness to make one. 

 

"Why do you want to make a bright song so much?" Kyungsoo retorted and they had been using each other’s words and throwing questions back at each other for a while now so Baekhyun took it upon himself to break this rather childish argument.

 

They had to settle on this and maybe having this conversation while randomly standing in the middle of the campus ground wasn’t the best thing to do, especially when Baekhyun had class in less than half an hour, but Baekhyun had thought about this before. He had thought back on their first conversation a few times for the past few days and he didn’t think that he would’ve been so bothered if Kyungsoo had told him that he wanted to make nothing but a bright song and that wasn’t even because _he_ wanted to make nothing but a bright song. 

 

It had lingered on his mind and he had asked around a bit about Kyungsoo, he had a few friends who shared some classes with him and he had talked about it with Jongdae again because he just had to get it out of his mind. Surprisingly, no one knew anything personal about Kyungsoo, something that was weird because with social media and the level of gossip that was lower than high school but still rather high in university, it should have been easy to find some information about him. There was nothing, however. Baekhyun hadn’t been able to hear anything but the fact that Kyungsoo rarely hung around campus except when he had class, that he never attended any kind of party, that no one even randomly ran into him in the streets, and that the only person he had ever been seen with was supposed to be his best friend, someone who didn’t even share the same major as him.

 

Baekhyun supposed that all of this shouldn't really be weird, it wasn’t uncommon for people to just want to focus on their studies and spend time alone the way they were comfortable but there was just _something_ about Kyungsoo. There was just those tiny little swirls in his eyes that sometimes seemed to spread out and wrap around his whole body like shadows that no kind of light could chase away. Kyungsoo had that odd aura around him, something that looked like a sad song, a ballad about loneliness, a soft melody that you would never catch unless you cut your own breath off to listen carefully and catch the small notes of sorrow dancing around the other. Baekhyun had seen it that day when they were in the cafeteria and he had said that Kyungsoo seemed like the ballad kind of person. He had seen it. He had recognized it because he had spent so many sleepless nights catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror and immediately looking away because moonlight seemed to only make those same swirls brighter around his own body and the same song louder in the silence of the night.

 

Baekhyun hated sad songs, he couldn’t relate to them. Or maybe he related to some of them too much.

 

"Well," he finally shrugged after a few silent seconds they spent staring at each other, waiting for one of them to yield first. "They say you pour your feelings into your song. I’m happy so I want to make a happy song and spread that feeling to others," he continued softly, looking away for a second as he curved his lips into a gentle smile. Spreading happiness was the only reason why Baekhyun had started making music. He looked back at Kyungsoo, noticing that he had the other’s whole attention on him even if there was no glimpse of emotion on his features. "But you want to make a sad song. Why?"

 

Silence settled over them for a few seconds when Baekhyun almost whispered that single-worded question, gaze carefully trailing over Kyungsoo’s features to catch a glimpse of something that could help him understand the other. There wasn’t much, however, only a slight furrow of his eyebrows, his wide eyes looking at Baekhyun without any animosity despite the other questioning him more than he had the right to, and his lips pulled into a tight line. Perhaps he looked a bit surprised, as if he hadn’t expected Baekhyun to ask such a question, as if he had never been asked such a question, and for a second, Baekhyun thought that maybe he had gone too far. They were still strangers, after all, even if Baekhyun felt this odd familiarity and comfortability with Kyungsoo. The other might not share the same feelings about him and he had no right to suddenly pop into the other’s life and question him that way.

 

However, Kyungsoo heaved out a soft sigh and replied to him calmly, voice gentle but hesitant, as if he was singing the lyrics of a song he had created himself but wasn’t totally familiar with yet. His voice was still beautiful, however, and it suited him so much. It was low, serious, but calm and comforting. It flowed into Baekhyun’s ears with the familiarity of a song he listened to on loop without ever getting tired of it.

 

"I don’t like to listen to or write sad songs because I’m sad," the other finally said, shrugging a bit but not looking away from Baekhyun who felt himself oddly pulled in by his gaze. It was odd. He never felt himself paying so much attention to something that wasn’t directly related to music. "I just… I just can relate to that kind of song. I can feel the emotions and I can convey my emotions through that kind of song. You can do the same thing, can’t you? With bright songs," Kyungsoo said, his words sounding like a question until Baekhyun nodded to show his agreement.

 

"I do relate to bright songs," he muttered.

 

"I don’t," Kyungsoo shook his head. "At least, not every kind of bright song and especially not the kind that blasts crude lyrics about partying, having sex, and dancing all night. The music might be great, the melody might actually make me want to dance but I just can’t relate to that kind of lyrics. It’s much easier for me to write a song, pull out a melody of my head if it speaks of loneliness, emptiness, broken love or the kind of things you probably find cheesy and hate. I relate to that and you don’t because maybe you’ve never experienced it. It doesn’t mean I hate bright songs and it doesn’t mean that they’re lame either so you should stop thinking that anyone who likes sad ballads is weird and hates every other kind of song."

 

It wasn’t even meant to be insulting or mocking, Kyungsoo hadn’t even pronounced those words with the aim of hurting him or shutting him up about this whole issue, but Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel something in his heart shifting, as if his ribcage had suddenly shattered and his bones were piercing into his heart, pain spreading through his whole body with every single beat of his heart. Kyungsoo was right. He had never experienced such thing, he had never experienced a broken heart, he had never really cried himself to sleep because he missed someone so much it was difficult to even accept letting air into his lungs, he had never experienced the kind of loneliness that caged you on your own in a room full of people. He had never. 

 

Had he never? Then why was it sometimes difficult to sleep at night because no matter how happy he was, it always felt like something was missing? Baekhyun had never been able to put a name on whatever was missing, however, he didn’t know what it was so he spent most of his time ignoring it because he was happy, wasn’t he? He was happy, he had tons of friends and they might not all be as sincere as he was with them but he still had real friends, he had Jongdae with him and a few other close friends he could be himself with. 

 

He didn’t know. He didn’t really know but he knew that if Kyungsoo was able to relate to that kind of song, it meant that he felt lonely, that he might have gotten his heart broken at one point in his life and Baekhyun felt those same bone-like needles piercing into his heart a bit more at the thought. He wished Kyungsoo could relate to brighter songs because despite his words just now, he still related to sad lyrics more than anything else. Baekhyun didn’t like seeing unhappiness and sadness in people, he couldn’t stand it, and as he observed Kyungsoo he couldn’t help but wonder what could he do to get rid of those feelings in the other and help him experience a life as happy as the lyrics in his favorite songs sounded. However, he knew there was no such thing as an entirely happy life, and even in the brightest of songs, life wasn’t painted with colorful emotions and positive gleams of light. Life wasn’t about perfect happiness and contentment, life was about being able to find the small bits of happiness and contentment even in the darkest moments.

 

Baekhyun hoped Kyungsoo was able to find a gleam of light to cling onto even in the darkest of nights. Baekhyun hoped the same thing for everyone he met but for some reason, he felt as if it wasn’t just a wish concerning Kyungsoo. He sincerely wanted the other to be happy, no matter how odd that felt.

 

"Don’t look at me as if I just told you that my dog died last night," Kyungsoo chuckled softly after a few seconds while Baekhyun had been too caught up in his thoughts about the other to actually say anything. The seriousness was gone from his features as he looked at Baekhyun with an odd glint in his eyes, something that Baekhyun had never seen in the other until now.

 

His voice had gone back to the soothing lullaby it usually was and maybe, Baekhyun would be able to decipher Kyungsoo better now that the other had helped him understand him a bit more. They were different, really different maybe, but that didn’t mean they had no similarities either and if Baekhyun was able to see a part of himself in Kyungsoo, maybe the other was able to as well.

 

Either way, even if they ended up having nothing in common at all, that wouldn’t change the fact that Kyungsoo was so _soothing_ to be around and that Baekhyun felt as if he was taking a break from everything else whenever they were together. 

 

And suddenly, it just seemed completely silly for two music majors to childishly argue about sad song or bright songs being better than the other.

 

"You don’t look like a dog person, you probably don’t even have a dog," Baekhyun snorted softly, feeling his lips curve into his usual smile now that that he knew they wouldn’t have to argue about this matter anymore.

 

"You’re a good observer then, I don’t have any pet," Kyungsoo replied, one corner of his lips lifting up into that small, lazy smile again as he gave Baekhyun what probably was only a mock impressed look.

 

"I am, you should fear me," he retorted, playfully narrowing his eyes.

 

"I can’t possibly fear you when you’re probably carrying another pack of gummy bears in your backpack," Kyungsoo confidently stated, raising a brow.

 

Baekhyun furrowed his eyebrows just to play along. "How did you know?"

 

"I must be a good observer too," the other shrugged nonchalantly, his smile widening a bit until that heart shape was drawn on his face. Baekhyun oddly found his eyes pulled to it for a second before he looked up into the other’s amused eyes again.

 

"That gives us a third common point besides the love for Curried Chicken sandwiches and the short legs then," he chuckled softly.

 

"It does, weirdly."

 

"Why ‘weirdly’?" Baekhyun asked, a bit confused.

 

"I just thought we would be be completely different," the other explained softly, gaze still trailing over him with that same odd look in his eyes.

 

"Well, I can adapt to people easily." It was Baekhyun’s turn to shrug lightly before he strayed the conversation back towards a more serious topic. "That’s why we should stop arguing about silly things and just settle on making a song that’s not too bright nor too sad."

 

"That could be a bit difficult, I feel like we’re going to clash a lot," Kyungsoo hummed, visibly simply stating something and not outright rejecting Baekhyun.

 

"We could just divide the work, it wouldn’t be unusual. You could take care of the melody and I could write the lyrics going with it. We can just work on it together until we’re both satisfied with it."

 

That seemed like the most logical thing to do for now and if Kyungsoo could make some efforts then Baekhyun would do. Maybe they could even teach each other a few things along the way.

 

Kyungsoo pursed his lips in thought for a few seconds before finally nodding and pulling Baekhyun’s lips into a slightly relieved but wide smile. Now that they had managed to reach the end of this silly debate, they could probably start working on the actual song together.

 

"We could do that. We have to start working on it at one point anyway and a week has already passed without us doing anything about it."

 

Baekhyun nodded but before he could formulate a proper reply, he felt his phone buzzing in his pocket so he reached for it, furrowing his eyebrows at the notification that greeted him when he lit up the screen. It was a message from Jongdae asking him whether he was skipping the class or not and when Baekhyun saw what time it was, his eyes widened a bit. The classroom was at the other side of the campus and he had a bit less than ten minutes to reach it if he didn’t want to be late.

 

"We should start working on it but I have class now," he gave Kyungsoo an apologetic smile, watching as the other’s features fell a little bit before he shook his head.

 

"That’s okay, we can work it out later."

 

"You should give me your number so we can keep in contact when we can’t see each other at school," he suddenly asked, remembering how much he had regretted not exchanging their numbers last week. It would be easier this way.

 

Kyungsoo simply nodded before taking Baekhyun’s phone when the latter handed it to him. He watched as Kyungsoo’s eyebrows furrowed into that same frown he always had whenever he was looking at his phone and he found it oddly endearing but didn’t comment on it, simply waiting until the other gave him the phone back. 

 

"I sent myself a message to have your number too," he informed Baekhyun before playfully narrowing his eyes. "Don’t change my contact name into something childish."

 

"What do you take me for?" Baekhyun simply huffed.

 

"A kid," Kyungsoo deadpanned without any kind of hesitation, raising an eyebrow.

 

"I’m not a kid," Baekhyun muttered under his breath, narrowing his eyes back at the other for a few silent seconds before he remembered that he had a class to go to. "Anyway, I gotta go so I’ll see you later?"

 

"Yeah, have fun," Kyungsoo smiled, words tinted with irony since he seemed to know not every class was great.

 

"I’ll try," he replied in the same tone before giving the other one last smile that was returned with a light one and finally turning to head towards his classroom.

 

He felt a bit lighter now that they had solved this small issue and even if the fact that Kyungsoo could relate to sad songs more than bright songs had saddened him a bit, Baekhyun knew that it didn’t matter that much. Maybe they’d be able to push each other into understanding music a bit more and maybe it would be much more pleasant than Baekhyun had first thought it would be.

 

Kyungsoo was an interesting person, someone that seemed difficult to decipher but still interesting nonetheless. Despite their huge differences, they also managed to get along even if if all they had done until now was argue about the mood of a song and tease each other. They seemed to understand each other rather well, even if Baekhyun had expected Kyungsoo to be different than he actually was and the latter had thought the same way about him. It might be a good experience to get to know someone like Kyungsoo.  
  
He couldn’t erase the silly smile off his face the whole way towards the classroom and once he had settled on his usual spot next to Jongdae, a bit late but safe from the teacher’s wrath since he seemed to be in a good mood that day, Baekhyun spent the whole class trying to stop himself from changing Kyungsoo’s contact name into something much more childish than his plain name.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As predicted, they hadn’t gotten the chance to see each other at all in the following days except for the Composition Theory class they shared but Baekhyun had been late to that class and Mrs. Choi had been early to it so they hadn’t been able to talk at all. Kyungsoo also had to rush to his next class after that so Baekhyun had been left with an odd feeling of disappointment pinching his heart and pulling his features into that sour expression that Jongdae had made fun of for the rest of the day.

 

Fortunately, Baekhyun had remembered to exchange their numbers that day, however, and thanks to that, they had been able to communicate through small texts even if he had come to learn that Kyungsoo wasn’t really the kind of person who liked texting others all day. His replies were all rather short and whenever he talked to him, Baekhyun almost felt as if he were talking to his father since his texts all sounded formal, had proper punctuation, and he took at least fifteen minutes to reply to each text. That was yet another difference of theirs since Baekhyun was the kind to end all of his text with a smiley or some kind of funny acronym as he was the kind of person who thought that his texts would sound too cold otherwise. He also liked to just talk to people all day in order to have something to do so it had been a bit upsetting and also weird considering Kyungsoo’s eyes were always stuck on his phone whenever Baekhyun ran into him.

 

He hadn’t hesitated to comment about that fact and when he had asked Kyungsoo what he was always doing on his phone if he wasn’t texting anyone, the other had only replied it was none of his business. As usual, the text had sounded rather cold but when Baekhyun had sent him a crying face, the other had replied with a weird wink that managed to make him laugh enough to forget about it. It hadn’t even deterred him and Baekhyun continued to send Kyungsoo random texts to ask how he was doing and then spent at least five minutes trying to get the conversation going since Kyungsoo’s reply was always along the lines of _I’m fine, thank you._ It didn’t matter though, he didn’t mind having a one sided conversation made of his complaints about school and funny events that happened to him through the day. He didn’t even know why he wanted to talk to the other so much. Probably because Kyungsoo had a funny way of texting and always ended up telling Baekhyun to work on his dreaded essay for Western Music that was due in a bit more than a week now. It somehow felt pleasant to send a bunch of random messages to Kyungsoo until the latter couldn’t take it anymore and shut him up with a single, cold sentence always followed by a weird wink when Baekhyun sent a crying face. It was odd.

 

Amidst the useless and silly conversations, Baekhyun still had the occasion to ask Kyungsoo for another meeting to actually start working on their song and the other easily accepted, which led Baekhyun to stand in front of an unfamiliar door on a Saturday afternoon, an unusual feeling of nervousness settled over his chest.

 

He wasn’t sure why that feeling had taken over him as soon as he had stepped into the apartment building that looked so much different than Baekhyun’s, as in so much more _expensive,_ but he had to take a deep breath before bringing himself to ring the doorbell. Fortunately, the door opened after a few seconds only, revealing a Kyungsoo that was no different than how he usually looked, still dressed in familiar colors with his dark blue shirt and the black jeans that seemed to hug his thighs really nicely.

 

"Hi," Baekhyun grinned as soon as he managed to pull his gaze back up to the other’s face. "I hope you’re as happy to see me as you’d be to see the pizza delivery guy because I certainly am as happy as someone about to get paid."

 

The second thing that Baekhyun had learned about Kyungsoo thanks to their texting was that the other’s answer to anything that could remotely be taken as flirty was an immediate judging emoticon that looked like someone narrowing their eyes at you. Not that Baekhyun had ever tried purposely flirting with him, he wasn’t even aware of it until he had complained to Jongdae about Kyungsoo sending him that emoticon every time he said something nice to him. His best friend had merely sighed, his features oddly similar to Kyungsoo’s second favorite emoticon as he had told Baekhyun that he was hopeless.

 

However, this wasn’t a text and instead of sending him a judgmental combination of characters, Kyungsoo simply raised a brow but Baekhyun managed to catch those familiar swirls of amusement floating in the depth of his irises.

 

"You’re not holding pizza, why would I be as happy as I’d be if you were?" was the answer that made Baekhyun scrunch his nose a bit in mock sadness.

 

"That’s no way to treat your kind project partner," he then narrowed his eyes instead. "I just complimented you by telling you I was happy to see you!"

 

"Just shut up and come in," Kyungsoo replied but his lips were curved into that now familiarly faint, lopsided, but amused smile as he stepped back and opened the door wider.

 

Baekhyun grinned at him but did as told, silently stepping into the apartment and immediacy letting his curious eyes linger around as he toed his shoes off at the entrance like Kyungsoo indicated him to do. The entrance hall was small but neat and as he advanced deeper into the house and stepped into the living room, Baekhyun noted that it was the same thing for the whole apartment. It wasn’t too big, it probably only had a single bedroom but it wasn’t too small either and the dark brown hues decorating the living room made it look bigger and warmer than it probably was. The brown leather couch looked comfortable, the low table planted in front of it was bare save for a single empty mug that seemed to have contained coffee at one point, and there were a few pictures around the room. There were mostly family pictures and Kyungsoo was only a child in most of them, with his sparkly eyes and that same heart shaped smile.

 

"It’s nice," he said after a while, turning his attention back to Kyungsoo and meeting his gaze.

 

"Thanks," the other simply said.

 

"You live alone?"

 

"Yeah, I don’t think I’d survive if I had to share a home with anyone," he replied, scrunching his nose a bit as if the mere idea was repealing to him.

 

"Are you planning to stay single forever?" he couldn’t help but laugh softly. Kyungsoo simply shrugged as if it didn’t matter to him and it probably did because why else would he listen to songs about broken hearts and loneliness? He didn’t comment on it, however, and gave the other an apologetic smile. "I’m sorry I suggested this meeting and it should have been at my apartment but my roommate’s throwing a party so it would have been a bit inconvenient."

 

"It’s like three in the afternoon," Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow.

 

"Jongdae's motto is ‘life’s a party anyway, there’s no fixated hour to get drunk and have fun,’" he quoted his best friend, voice taking on a higher and slightly whiny tone as he did so.

 

"You got yourself the perfect roommate then," Kyungsoo slightly snorted, the small sound carrying amusement to Baekhyun’s ears.

 

"I’m not a drunkard like Jongdae is," he protested, following Kyungsoo when the latter motioned him to do so. He didn’t know why he disliked the prospect of Kyungsoo seeing him as some kind of party monster since it was kind of what he was but he didn’t want the other to think of him as such.

 

"Do you want something to drink? I just made coffee," the other said, changing the subject altogether.

 

"I hate coffee, no thanks," he singsonged, following Kyungsoo as they walked through the hallway and noticing that his apartment didn’t have a single bedroom, in fact, since they had passed two doors and were heading towards the third one at the end of the hallway.

 

"Of course, you’d probably only drink something like strawberry milk in the morning."

 

"You already know me so well, partner."

 

They stopped in front of the third door and Kyungsoo pushed it open, letting Baekhyun step in first. The latter froze as soon as he walked in, eyes widening the slightest bit as he looked around in something akin to wonder, gaze trailing over the content of the rather wide room. There was a small, dark blue couch pushed against the wall, yet another coffee table planted in front of it, and right across from it, there was a desk decorated with an expensive computer. There was even a professional microphone to record a song along with a few other gadgets Baekhyun almost felt himself drooling in front of. His gaze wasn’t drawn to them, however, he was looking at the keyboard planted right beside it and the two different guitars proudly standing on the floor next to it as well.

 

"You play guitar?" he wondered out loud, not even caring when amazement seeped into his voice.

 

Kyungsoo’s soft chuckle pulled Baekhyun’s eyes back to him and he tried getting a grip of himself at the sight of the amused smile still lingering on the other’s lips.

 

"Yeah, occasionally," he shrugged, so casually as if playing guitar wasn’t even a huge fit when Baekhyun had basically yearned to learn how to play that wonderful instrument since he was little but had always chosen to completely focus on piano instead.

 

"That’s awesome," he hummed, moving to settle on the couch as his gaze kept wandering around. "This place is awesome."

 

It was basically a small studio to make and record music and Baekhyun couldn’t ignore the small glint of envy in him as he thought about all the things Kyungsoo could probably do in this place. He had always wanted to have this kind of studio for himself but his life as a college student didn’t allow him such luxury for now.

 

"Thanks, I’m glad you like it. I guess I should thank my parents for it," Kyungsoo replied as he plopped down on the chair in front of the desk and rolled himself closer to Baekhyun. It looked kind of funny but not surprising.

 

"If they have any money to spare, I’m right here," he playfully wiggled his eyebrows, drawing a small chuckle out of the other. He took it in like the first few notes of a song you hadn’t had the occasion to listen to in so long despite having missed it, his own smile widening.

 

"I’ll let them know one day but I’m sure you should do the talking yourself, you’d be more convincing."

 

"Oh, you already want to introduce me to your parents? You’re so quick, I just stepped into your house," he teased the other, earning a roll of his eyes.

 

"Let’s just focus on the project," he snorted, shaking his head in what Baekhyun knew to be mock exasperation.

 

"Right, the project!" he perked up, taking a deep breath. He hoped that this wouldn’t turn into another argument about genres and themes.

 

"Have you given any thought to what our not-too-sad-nor-too-happy song should be about?" the other asked, resting an elbow on the armrest of his chair and cupping his chin with his hand as he looked at Baekhyun.

 

"I actually gave it some thought and I think the only theme that we could work on together without possibly insulting each other would be love," Baekhyun replied, nodding as if to convince himself that it was really what he wanted to do.

 

He had thought about it a lot actually and love seemed to be the best theme for them even if it had never really been something that had inspired Baekhyun. All the lyrics he had written until today were about a bunch of other things but he had checked this morning before coming here and there really was nothing he had written about love. Not that it came off as a surprise to him, it wasn’t really something he was comfortable with but he supposed that it would be one of Kyungsoo’s preferred themes. He had already managed to convince the other not to make a depressing song so the least he could do was to adapt himself to some of Kyungsoo’s preferences as well.

 

The other seemed surprised by it, however, and it was only a slight shift on his features but Baekhyun managed to catch the faint raise of his eyebrow.

 

"You want to make a song about love," he stated more than questioned, notes of surprise flowing neatly into his voice.

 

"Why is that weird?" he asked, chuckling softly. "If you’re willing to make something other than a depressing song, I’m willing to write lyrics about love. Isn’t that like your favorite theme?" 

 

It was probably one of the most overused and empty themes in Baekhyun’s eyes but he supposed there were sacrifices to make for a good grade.

 

"It is one of the most beautiful themes you can find in songs, yes," Kyungsoo replied as if he had read Baekhyun’s thoughts and had heard the faint lilt of disgust in his voice.

 

"If you’re willing to make a happy song, I can write you happy lyrics about love and all that cheesy stuff," Baekhyun shrugged.

 

It wasn’t that he didn’t like love songs because most bright songs out there were about love. Most songs in general were about love, actually, and he listened to a bunch of them everyday so liking it or not wasn’t the problem. Whether he’d be able to do it or not was the problem because until now, the only lyrics he had ever written were about social problems, small stories poured into paper from his own life or the life of people he randomly saw in the streets. It was easy to imagine that each person had their own song, their life song, their soul song, and the song that would represent them the most. The small child playing football on his own in the streets by kicking the ball against a wall and repeating the process again and again had his own song about clinging to what he loved doing the most even if he was alone through it all. The grandmother selling flowers a few blocks away from school had her own story about living a fulfilled life that had been as beautiful as the colorful flowers she held in the hands that had been wrinkled by hardship and age. Even Kyungsoo had his own song, Baekhyun could hear it from time to time when he let his guard drop.

 

"I guess love would also fit a lively song. Are you sure you can write lyrics about it, though?"

 

"Why wouldn’t I be able to?" he furrowed his eyebrows, slightly defensive because he didn’t expect Kyungsoo to sense how difficult it might actually be for him.

 

"I don’t know, do you even believe in love?" Kyungsoo mirrored his expression, looking at him with _that_ glint in his eyes, as if he was trying to light up the path to Baekhyun’s thoughts.

 

For some reason, that question ticked him off a bit. Did Kyungsoo see him as a heartless person? Or did he just believe in all those rumors about him?

 

"Why wouldn’t I believe in love?" 

 

Kyungsoo seemed to hear the upset edges of his voice, letting a few silent seconds pass while observing Baekhyun before shrugging.

 

"You never date anyone. You reject everyone who confesses to you and the only person you dated was out of pity."

 

"How do you know all of that?" he raised an eyebrow even if he had heard those same words so many times in the back of his classrooms or when Jongdae felt like updating him on what was being spread about him.

 

"Rumors," the other simply said and Baekhyun sighed.

 

"Do you believe in all those rumors?" he asked, voice not even carrying anything close to anger. He wasn’t angry, maybe a bit disappointed and upset. He had thought that Kyungsoo wouldn’t judge him based on those sayings like most people did. He looked away from the other, focusing on his fingers as they fumbled together instead, a clear sign of his nervousness. He didn’t even know why he cared about Kyungsoo’s opinion about him so much.

 

"I used to," the other finally replied and Baekhyun’s confused gaze snapped back up to him.

 

"Used to? You don’t anymore?"

 

"Not really. I told you, you’re different than how I thought you’d be," Kyungsoo said softly, his lips curving into a light smile that eased the disappointment away from Baekhyun.

 

"And how did you think I would be?" he still asked, however.

 

Kyungsoo once again shrugged, looking away from him. "An asshole, probably?"

 

"Well, thanks," Baekhyun snorted, upset but slightly amused by the fact that Kyungsoo could outright say that to his face.

 

"That’s how the rumors are," the other explained, furrowing his eyebrows a bit as if he feared upsetting Baekhyun. "I might not have too many friends but I can still hear what people say about you. Usually it’s something along the lines of you being a fuckboy, a manipulative jerk, and someone who takes pleasure in breaking innocent people’s heart."

 

"That’s not what I am," Baekhyun finally snapped, voice coming off stronger than intended and visibly surprising Kyungsoo who froze, his fingers stuck in his hair as he had been running his digits through the short strands while speaking.

 

He was just tired of it all. Tired of people misunderstanding him and then putting the whole blame on him when he didn’t deserve such mean words at all. He knew that he wasn’t completely innocent in all this, Jongdae had told him about it enough times for Baekhyun to actually start understanding it but was it his fault? Was wanting to make other people smile a bad thing? He might have been at fault but all of this wouldn’t happen if some people’s pride didn’t overthrow their reason and caused them to complain and blame someone else as soon as they got a little hurt. Did they all think it was pleasant for him to hurt people he had only wanted to make smile? It wasn’t and what was worse was that no one ever thought that maybe Baekhyun got his heart broken a little more with each insulting word thrown at him.

 

"That’s not what I am at all," he repeated when Kyungsoo remained silent, simply looking at him without letting anything appear on his features. "I don’t take pleasure in breaking people’s heart and getting hurt in return. I don’t intend to seduce people only to throw them away when I finally have them. I’m not some kind of heartless monster who’s unable to develop feelings either," he continued through gritted teeth, listing everything that always was thrown at his face whenever he had enough of pleasing people and had to draw the line somewhere. "I don’t do this on purpose, Kyungsoo. I never even know how it always ends up being the same thing. I don’t know why it always happens. I don’t hurt people on purpose, I don’t break their heart because I want to. I just… I just don’t."

 

He cut himself off before he could say anything else, not wanting to pour everything he had kept hidden in his heart until now on Kyungsoo when the latter probably didn’t even care about it. They were just project partners anyway and Kyungsoo probably didn’t care about those rumors because he didn’t care about Baekhyun’s life. He was just in this for the project and Baekhyun was already the one holding him back from making a song that fitted his taste so he shouldn’t worsen everything by uselessly pouring his thoughts out on Kyungsoo.

 

"I know, you just want to make people smile."

 

Those words were uttered gently, softly, like the first notes of a bird chirping in the morning to call for the end of a dark night full of storms and thunder and the start of a bright and warm day. As if awakened from a nightmare by the morning’s gentle symphony of a bird’s singing, the gentle wind blowing against his window, and the sounds of the city slowly leaving its few hours of slumber, Baekhyun looked up at Kyungsoo again, gaze filled with surprise. The smile on the other’s lips felt like the first rays of sunlight dripping from the bedroom window to his face at the start of a long day and he couldn’t find anything to say for a few seconds, simply staring at the other in surprise.

 

"What?" was the very stupid thing he asked as soon as the surprise dissipated a little.

 

"All of this happens because you just want to make people happy, I know," Kyungsoo started, sighing a little bit. Something told Baekhyun it wasn’t really an annoyed sigh, it couldn’t be when the smile still lingered on his lips. "You just have a slightly off way to make people happy and it causes you trouble and backfires at the end. I know, I understand you now. That’s why I said I _used_ to believe in those rumors."

 

"How?" he questioned, his heart suddenly not fitting in his chest, as if it was too big and too small at the same time, something pressing on his chest and pulling too much air into his lungs and not enough at the same time. 

 

He didn’t know what it was exactly, it was an odd feeling but Kyungsoo’s gentle voice sounded like the lullaby his mother used to sing to him when he was a child waking up from a nightmare in the middle of the night and screaming in fear.

 

No one had ever said that to him, not even Jongdae who never uttered those words gently and simply scolded him each time. No one had ever said they understood Baekhyun and no one had ever thought that he wasn’t doing all those things on purpose. No one but Kyungsoo.

 

"I told you I’m a good observer, just like you are. You said it was one of our common points, didn’t you?" he chuckled softly, the low sound sending shivers down Baekhyun’s spine. It was odd, so odd. "I saw you around campus a few times for the past two weeks and I never linger on you too much but I did notice a few things. Whenever someone’s with you, they’re always smiling, laughing, or looking at you with stars in their eyes. You just have that effect on people. I don’t know how you even do it but you just make people feel happy and you know it, each time someone’s smiling at you, you just smile back at them wider. It’s as if their happiness leads to yours, as if making someone smile is enough for you to be happy. I know that’s your only intention and people often misunderstand you."

 

The more Kyungsoo talked, the warmer Baekhyun’s chest felt, his words sounding like a melody that Baekhyun had heard once upon a time in his head but that he had no way of remembering where it came from until Kyungsoo gave him the answer he had been looking for, as if the other had understood what he was referring to only a few seconds after Baekhyun hummed the melody under his breath for him. No one had ever understood Baekhyun in such a way that even he was surprised to hear those words and find that they were right even if he had never even thought about it that way himself. It was odd, so odd because he had only spent a couple hours at most with Kyungsoo and yet, the other understood him better than anyone else despite the many differences between them.

 

It was odd because Kyungsoo was always said to be a loner and always had a blank or even grumpy expression on whenever Baekhyun caught a glimpse of him at school but no trace of such emotions were plastered over his face right now. There was nothing but a faint smile that somehow sparkled in his eyes as he never once pulled his gaze away from Baekhyun. He was smiling and maybe Baekhyun didn’t work too hard to earn this smile but being at the receiving end of it still felt like the best prize he could ever be given and when laughter bubbled in his chest, he didn’t even try keeping it in. He simply chuckled softly, oddly embarrassed although his ears picked on the notes of joy dancing in his own voice.

 

"Is this your way of telling me I make you happy?" he said, not knowing what else to reply to such words when his chest still felt weirdly tight and his heart was behaving unusually in the confine of his ribcage. It had just always been easy to form words that would draw a smile on others’ face.

 

And although Kyungsoo’s smile wasn’t always a wide one, the faint curl of his lips was enough for Baekhyun to take a deep breath in, happiness surging through his veins at the prospect of being the one to draw that rare smile on his lips.

 

"When did I even say that?" the other replied, the heavy tension slowly dissipating between them.

 

"You just said I make people happy, you’re a part of ‘people’ so I make you happy."

 

"That’s a far fetched compliment for yourself," the other replied, leaning back into his chair and looking at Baekhyun with that lopsided, amused smile. It somehow suited him really well, it gave him a casual look that was enhanced by his handsome features.

 

"You seem to be the kind of person who hides praises under long sentences and complicated words," Baekhyun hummed, narrowing his eyes and trailing them over Kyungsoo as if he was studying a complicated subject.

 

"Stop changing the subject so randomly in the middle of the conversation," Kyungsoo finally chuckled softly, putting an end to Baekhyun’s playful antics. "You always do that."

 

"You never notice until it’s already done," Baekhyun simply shrugged, grinning at the other.

 

Kyungsoo seemed to be determined to go back to their initial subject of conversation, however, the smile vanishing off his face to leave room for his usual serious expression.

 

"But really, I didn’t mean to upset you by asking you if you would be able to write lyrics about love. I didn’t mean to bring up those rumors either, I just asked that because I thought that you never fell in love so it might be a bit difficult for you if you can’t relate to what you’re supposed to write about," the other explained calmly.

 

Baekhyun understood him, it was a good point as well because he was right, Baekhyun had never fallen in love and he knew next to nothing about that feeling besides the fact that it could either feel like the cruelest torture or the most heavenly blessing. However, he didn’t want that to be an issue.

 

"There’s nothing I can’t do," he shrugged. "If you’re willing to make a lively song, I’m willing to write lyrics about love to balance things up or else it would be unfair."

 

"Are you sure?"

 

"Are you questioning me so much just because you really don’t want to make a happy song?" he said suspiciously, narrowing his eyes.

 

"We wont make a happy song. It won’t be _too_ happy," Kyungsoo reminded him, stressing on his words.

 

Baekhyun shook his head in mock exasperation. "I know, I know. Either way, it shouldn’t be too difficult only for you so I’ll accept this challenge as well and we can start working on it. You’re complying to my request so I should at least comply to one of yours."

 

"You want to make me happy that much?" were the words Kyungsoo’s teasing voice carried to his ears and Baekhyun found himself unable to say anything for a few seconds, pined down by the other’s insistent, heavy gaze.

 

"What?" he said stupidly, for the second time today.

 

"You already talked me into making a lively song, you could’ve just written the lyrics however you want but you’re going out of your way to make sure I’m content with it," the other shrugged, still with the same teasing smile on his lips.

 

"Do you want me to actually talk you into doing whatever I want?" he replied, raising a playful eyebrow.

 

"You managed to talk me into doing a happy song only because I allowed you to," Kyungsoo retorted, mirroring Baekhyun’s expression and as silence settled over them for a few seconds, there it was again.

 

That odd thing he had felt between them when they had been eating together at the cafeteria almost two weeks ago, something heavy that somehow squeezed Baekhyun’s heart but not in an unpleasant way. 

 

Kyungsoo’s smile grew victorious when Baekhyun couldn’t find anything to say, something that was really rare for him, and for a split second he wondered if that was Kyungsoo’s own odd, discreet way of flirting with someone. Was he feeling comfortable enough with Baekhyun to actually be teasing and flirt back with him? The thought somehow send tickles through his chest before it all ceased when Baekhyun thought that he had no reason to consciously flirt with Kyungsoo who also had no reason to flirt back with him. He had chosen him because he knew that Kyungsoo wouldn’t end up developing that kind of feelings for him, after all.

 

"Well, since you keep straying the topic somewhere else, I’m starting to think that you actually are unable to make a lively song, you haven’t even started on it, have you?" he asked, letting a bit of challenge seep into his voice.

 

"Why don’t you enlighten me on how to make a happy and bright song then, almighty creature?" was Kyungsoo’s calm reply and it was an alliance between two different tones, amusement and something that Baekhyun suspected to be somewhere between irony and sarcasm. It was a melody that somehow sounded as nice as the piano and violin that he had heard in one of the ballads he had tried listening to two nights ago just to try and understand Kyungsoo better.

 

There was also challenge somewhere in there however, and Baekhyun never backed off in front of a challenge so he simply stood up and walked towards the keyboard across from where they were sitting, passing by Kyungsoo and giving him an amused smile as the latter followed him with his gaze.

 

"I’m a ‘creature’ now? What kind? The kind that you see in your dreams and think can’t be real when you wake up?" he asked as he stood in front of the keyboard, gently trailing two fingers over the keys without applying any kind of pressure.

 

"I was thinking of something small and annoying like a hobbit but whatever helps you sleep at night," he heard, the notes of amusement in Kyungsoo’s voice not escaping him.

 

"Height jokes don’t work when you’re just as short as I am," he snorted, throwing the other a playful glare over his shoulder before gently pressing on a key and drawing the note out as he met Kyungsoo’s gaze, the latter having rolled the chair a bit closer and now facing him, or rather facing his back. "Actually you might even be shorter than me."

 

"Less talking, more playing," the other retorted, effectively shutting Baekhyun up.

 

"Alright, I’ll play you something that I think we could base ourselves on for a bright song that would cheer us all up!" he chirped instead, giving the other a last glance before he finally quieted down and focused on playing a song instead of random notes when he thought about the perfect song for this occasion.

 

He started off slowly, fingers gently pressing on the keys as he closed his eyes, fully focusing on the task at hand as he played one of his current favorite songs, the notes meshing together perfectly as he had played this song so many times in the past, each time taking pleasure in doing so. No one had ever heard him, though, and that wasn’t particularly because he held this song dear at heart but because he simply hadn’t really felt like letting anyone else listen to it. His lips curved into a gentle smile, one as light as his fingers felt as they danced on the melody that they created on their own, with each step and caress on the keys.

 

This song wasn’t really a creation of his own either but it was a song that he particularly liked and that he had spent a few hours learning and perfecting as it wasn’t even a difficult one, something simple that just always helped him relax no matter the circumstances. He was nearing the climax of the song, completely absorbed by it even if he still kept an ear available to pick on any kind of reaction Kyungsoo was willing to give him.

 

It took the other a while but just when Baekhyun was about to give up, right as he was about to reach the chorus, Kyungsoo didn’t disappoint him.

 

"Wait, isn’t that a rendition of Twice’s Cheer Up?" he heard Kyungsoo blurting out, voice carrying surprise and incredulity, finally louder than his usual calm and gentle tone. 

 

Behind his closed eyelids, Baekhyun could almost visualize the other’s surprised expression, laughter bubbling in his chest. However, he held it in because his favorite part of the song was coming and only then did he part his lips, not to give the obvious answer to Kyungsoo but to sing the lyrics that went along with the chorus of the song. If you could call it singing, since he was screaming his lungs out rather than actually singing, forcing himself to sing off-key, his fingers still dancing over the keyboard as his own voice echoed in his head, almost overpowering the melody coming from the piano. 

 

It took Kyungsoo only a few seconds but soon, Baekhyun managed to hear the sound of the chair rolling and then footsteps rushing towards him over the sound of his own voice before he felt strong hands grabbing his waist and pulling him back and away from the keyboard, the other’s words effectively shutting him up at once.

 

"What the hell, Baekhyun?! If this room wasn’t soundproof you’d have attracted a hoard of angry fans here for murdering this song!"

 

"Oh, so this room is really soundproof? I thought so," Baekhyun hummed softly, unimpressed gaze falling into Kyungsoo’s slightly panicked and mainly surprised one.

 

They looked at each other for a few blank seconds, Kyungsoo’s usually wide eyes widening even more as his hands were still gripping Baekhyun’s waist even if the other had turned to face him instead and kept his fingers away from the keyboard. Silence settled over them for those few seconds but it was broken when Baekhyun couldn’t keep his laughter in anymore, the absurdity of the situation he had created himself getting to him first and pushing a few notes of laughter out of his mouth. Seemingly infected by it, Kyungsoo let a small chuckle escape as well before suddenly, they were both laughing boisterously, the other’s hands dropping away from Baekhyun when the latter had to take a step back to bend forward a bit, hands pressing on his stomach as he was starting to get cramps from laughing too much.

 

It went on for almost five full minutes during which each time they were starting to quiet down, a glance at the other was enough for their eyes to meet, the look they exchanged enough to send both of them into loud laughter again. Baekhyun was seriously starting to be in pain but Kyungsoo’s laughter was contagious and he listened to it carefully, storing it somewhere in his mind along with the few other occasions he had heard Kyungsoo’s voice taking different edges. This was louder than mere amusement, not as low as mockery but still deep. His voice remained deep even as he laughed, sometimes going higher but always gaining its depth back, especially towards the end, when he was about to stop laughing. It sounded nice. It sounded like happiness and it sounded like _Kyungsoo._ As if he was finally letting himself go. It was odd but still nice.

 

"You were off-key, your rhythm didn’t even match the song’s slower flow when you play it on the piano," the other breathlessly said once they were finally done laughing like two idiots in an empty room. "How did you even manage to survive singing like this, you’re a music major. I wanted to cut your tongue off from frustration!" he continued, laughing a bit again at the end of his sentence and dragging Baekhyun into it.

 

"I’m just surprised, I thought you wouldn’t recognize the song at all since you basically hiss every time I mention mainstream music. But I guess not a single person who lives in this country doesn’t know this song," Baekhyun managed to say through the tightness in his stomach and his chest, throat a bit hoarse from singing so horrendously and then laughing so much right after. "And I wanted to cut myself off as well but I guess the want to make you laugh for real was stronger."

 

They took a few silent seconds to calm down again after that and Baekhyun could feel the other’s gaze on him but he didn’t pay too much attention to it, trying to gain a normal breathing pattern back.

 

"You did this to our poor ears just to make me laugh?" the other asked and his voice was now back to its usual low, soothing pace and volume albeit it still carried a few remains of surprise.

 

"I never saw you laugh for real besides a few small amused chuckles, I just wanted to hear what it would sound like," he replied honestly, shrugging a bit. It was true, he had just wanted Kyungsoo to let go of himself a bit especially after the semi-serious conversation they just had. Maybe he had also just wanted to make the other smile more.

 

"You’re really…" was all Kyungsoo said, trailing off as his gaze still traveled over Baekhyun in that now familiar way he did whenever he looked as if he was having a difficult time figuring the other out. "Weird."

 

"I murdered one of my favorite songs just to make you laugh and that’s how you’re treating me?" he reproached to the other, pulling his features into a mock disappointed expression and obnoxiously batting his lashes just because he had a feeling it would annoy Kyungsoo.

 

However, the other simply looked at him for a few silent seconds, still observing him before letting out a small, quiet chuckle.

 

"I really haven’t laughed that much in a long time… Thanks, I guess," he finally said, lips curving into that wide, heart shaped smile that Baekhyun hadn’t seen in a long time. It was really cute, a bit handsome too, but mostly adorable. It was a nice smile. A smile Baekhyun decided then and there that he wanted to see more often.

 

"You should thank me by actually ordering the pizza we talked about earlier," he suggested, a wide grin still on his face even if he was only half joking. All the laughter had really carved an empty hole in his stomach that he needed to fill up.

 

"Last time you wanted us to work while eating, we _only_ ate without getting any work done," the other raised an eyebrow, the faint trace of a smile lingering on his features.

 

"I promise we’ll actually work on the song this time!" he argued, pleading Kyungsoo with his eyes and leaning a tad closer to him, shamelessly getting into his personal space as he tried ridiculously giving the other puppy eyes.

 

"Oh, my god, fine. Just stop looking at me like that, you look so weird," were the words that broke his hope of actually convincing the other with puppy eyes, however, but the result was the same anyway so he pulled away, giving the other a victorious smile.

 

"I’ll go order it and we’re going to work until it gets delivered, alright?" Kyungsoo stated more than suggested, not really leaving the other any choice.

 

Baekhyun simply nodded eagerly and Kyungsoo looked at him for a few more seconds before shaking his head in what Baekhyun now knew to be mock exasperation. He retrieved his phone out of his jeans’ pocket, settling down on his armchair again and motioning Baekhyun to settle on the couch as he dialed the number that he seemingly knew by heart. He asked for what Baekhyun would like on his pizza while waiting for the line to pick up and as he repeated word for word what Baekhyun had told him while ordering, there was still the faint trace of a smile on his lips and his eyes were brighter than they had been when he had opened the door to Baekhyun a while ago.

 

His tone was totally emotionless and stern as he talked on the phone, reminding Baekhyun of their differences again since the latter would have probably made small conversation with whoever had picked up before actually ordering. They were different, so different despite a few similarities.

 

It didn't matter, though. Not when Baekhyun could make Kyungsoo laugh so loudly, his world brightening a bit more with the happiness that flowed through those sometimes small, sometimes loud notes of laughter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Isn’t she just so pretty? Look at that smile, she’s so lovely."

 

Baekhyun snorted at his best friend’s dreamy words, scrunching his nose a little bit in disgust when he sighed like a lovesick high school student, his gaze devouring Sooyoung from head to toe as she headed towards them.

 

"Stop this, your drool is going to scare her away."

 

"Shut the fuck up, why are you even here? I’m in a dream. She can’t be real," the other sighed again before straightening his back and clearing his throat as soon as Sooyoung pushed the coffee shop’s door open, laughing with the person that Baekhyun had only then noticed was walking with her.

 

"You told her to bring Yerim too?" he asked in surprise.

 

"Nope, she must have asked Sooyoung to tag along. Not surprising," Jongdae hummed, narrowing his eyes at a still very confused Baekhyun who shrugged.

 

They had been hanging around at the coffee shop a few blocks away from campus for close to an hour now with the intent of completing their assignments since after that Western Music essay he completed a few days ago, he now had another to work on for a subject he appreciated much less and this one was only due in three days. He hadn’t even actually gotten to work on it that much until now and he was panicking a little bit inside but he had thought that he would probably at least work on half of it this afternoon so he had tried ignoring the panic and had specifically asked Jongdae to tag along with him here so they could both work on that damn essay together. This place usually inspired him even if all he drunk was tea or anything that was as far as possible from the taste of coffee.

 

His plans had been crushed when Jongdae, who had been giving more attention to his phone than to his essay, had suddenly perked up, chirping about Sooyoung asking him what he was doing and telling him she was bored. Naturally, Jongdae had once again dumped both his student conscience and Baekhyun for the girl he had a massive crush on and here they were, smiling at two pretty girls  as Sooyoung settled down next to Jongdae and Yerim next to him. At least, they were both really nice and funny, or at least Sooyoung was since Baekhyun had probably talked to Yerim only a few times whenever they bumped into each other at a party.

 

"What are you doing here?" Sooyoung asked, smiling at Jongdae who looked as if he was ready to fall into her smile and get lost there forever.

 

"Trying to be good students and do our homework," his best friend immediately replied, like an annoying puppy eager to please its owner.

 

"I think it’s going to be difficult now that we have two pretty girls to distract us though," Baekhyun said, giving Yerim a light smile since she had been silent until now and looked a bit uncomfortable, as if she wasn’t sure she was accepted at this table.

 

She chuckled softly, relaxing a bit and filling Baekhyun up with relief. He didn’t want anyone to be uncomfortable around him.

 

"I don’t think they even heard you," she whispered to him rather loudly, obviously not with the intent to be discreet as she side-eyed Sooyoung and Jongdae who had already engaged into a random conversation about games and summer. It was an odd combination but he supposed it suited them both.

 

"I think so too, they’re basically going to ignore us now, I feel betrayed," he replied, faking a hurt expression that only made the other chuckle softly.

 

"I don’t mind, you’re nice company."

 

"That’s true, I’m the best company you can ask for when you feel like a third wheel and I’m glad you think so," he chuckled along, fingers wrapping around his empty cup. "I’m gonna get a refill, want me to get you anything?"

 

"An Iced Americano would be great," she smiled, looking at him as if he had just offered to buy her an entire collection of expensive jewelry.

 

He simply nodded, taking his empty cup with him as he stood up, throwing Jongdae a last barely amused glance before heading towards the counter. The barista wasn’t an unfamiliar one and he simply gave Baekhyun a friendly smile before immediately working on refilling his cup and preparing Yerim’s drink while making small conversation with him. He could feel Yerim’s gaze on him at one point so he glanced over his shoulder, meeting her eyes and giving her a light smile before she immediately looked away, as if caught red-handed. He looked in front of him again after that, silently waiting for his order to be ready.

 

He couldn’t help but let out a soft sigh, not entirely pleased with the situation at hand since he had initially planned to work on his assignment and all hopes of doing so had vanished with Jongdae’s tendencies to prioritize girls over his studies. He couldn’t even actually be upset about it because Yerim was a really nice person and she seemed genuinely happy to be with them, whatever the reason might be, so Baekhyun didn’t want to spoil it by just telling her she had to be quiet so he could work on his assignment. He wasn’t that kind of person anyway, he didn’t want to upset her either so as soon as their drinks were prepared, he paid for them with a light smile towards the barista and walked back to their table with the same smile still on his lips.

 

"There you go," he said, putting their drinks on the table before plopping down next to her again.

 

The smile constantly remained on her face after that and it was a nice smile but somehow, as they engaged into an actual conversation about their different majors and their plans for the upcoming summer, Baekhyun couldn’t really focus on it. Yerim talked a lot and she jumped from one subject to another in a way that even Baekhyun was starting to get dizzy despite being the kind of person who constantly did that as well. She was happy though, and that was what mattered, he guessed, since Sooyoung was giving all her attention to Jongdae and barely even glanced towards her.

 

She was a funny person and Baekhyun tried keeping up even if their subjects of conversation weren’t that interesting since they definitely had nothing in common and she barely even let him place more than a few words, constantly chirping about her plans, her grades, her friends, and how cute it was of Baekhyun to hate coffee so much. The latter tried keeping up with it but at one point, his mind had drifted away from her endless chattering as it was not interesting enough to keep his whole attention and he had already not been pleased with the situation at all to begin with. He simply hummed and nodded from time to time to let her know he was half-listening to her as he let his mind wander towards other subjects.

 

If he holed himself up in his room this weekend, he might be able to finish his essay for Monday but that would mean missing the party one of his friends was throwing on Saturday. He didn’t even feel like partying anyway, nowadays all he wanted to was to stay at home and simply laze around, communicating with people only through his phone and nothing else. Kyungsoo hadn’t replied to his latest message. He supposed it might be understandable since it had been a lame, random joke about short legs that he had stumbled upon online but still, he could at least reply to tell him it was not funny. Or maybe it was so not funny that he had simply chosen not to reply to Baekhyun. It could be understandable. He wondered what drink Kyungsoo would order if he were here. He seemed like the coffee type of person. Actually, Kyungsoo seemed like a lot of things and each time Baekhyun voiced it out, the other always told him that he was right so maybe Kyungsoo really was a coffee lover.

 

They had been talking quite a lot since their meeting in the other’s apartment, almost a week ago, about random things, about music and lyrics and their song. They had worked quite a lot that day and had even settled on what kind of song they were going for, it was going to be a ballad but not the sad kind of ballad, maybe something that would sound like a confession song. They argued about the instruments they were going to use but at the end, they had settled for a simple song with nothing but piano as a base. They hadn’t seen each other a lot since then but Kyungsoo had already started working on it since he would sometimes send small snippets of a melody to Baekhyun through the phone and the latter would always help him perfect it, telling him whether it sounded nice or not, whether he could make it brighter or not, talking about cords and rhythms, and sending him what he thought would sound nice by simply humming it or recording a melody he played on his own keyboard at home.

 

Kyungsoo still seemed unsure about the whole thing but they were slowly advancing even if he was still struggling with the lyrics which wasn’t too surprising since he knew it would be easier if he heard the whole finished song before working on it properly. In spite of that, Baekhyun knew that they would get there eventually, they actually made a nice team when they weren’t arguing which actually hadn’t happened again besides a few childish banter through texting. It had almost been a bit more than three weeks now and they still had time, there was no need to rush anything too much.

 

"Baekhyun, are you listening?" 

 

An upset voice suddenly pulled him out of his thoughts and snapped his gaze back at Yerim, meeting her saddened expression.

 

"I’m sorry, what?" he asked sheepishly, giving her an apologetic smile.

 

"I asked you what your dog was called. You have a dog, right? We talked about it last time we saw each other," she explained, still frowning a bit.

 

"Yeah! Yeah, I have a dog. He’s called Mongryong, he’s not with me though. He’s with my parents back in my hometown," he immediately explained, feeling bad for having been absent for god knows how long. "What about you? Do you have a dog? I think you’d be a really great dog owner, you’re kind and responsible enough for it."

 

He didn’t even know whether she was actually a responsible person or not but the smile suddenly brightening her features was enough for him to know that his words has at least made her happy so he relaxed a bit.

 

"I don’t have one yet but I’m thinking of getting one this summer so I can give it my whole attention without having to bother about school," she grinned.

 

"That’s a good idea," he nodded before his gaze caught on a faint dark trace at the corner of her lip. Without thinking, he simply reached for it, wiping the remnant of coffee away from her skin quietly since she seemed to be a bit self-conscious in general and would feel bad if she saw it on her own a while later. "You had a bit of coffee there," he smiled lightly.

 

Her wide eyes looked at him for a few silent seconds before she looked down at her hands fumbling together on her lap, her smile widening as a flush started dusting her pale cheeks.

 

"Thanks," she muttered, oddly turning shy at once.

 

However, before Baekhyun could say something else, the familiar ding of the door opening and the bell ringing in consequence pulled his attention to the entrance of the small coffee shop and when his gaze fell on the person he had been thinking about only a few seconds ago, his chest suddenly felt a bit tight, his heart oddly jumping around too much.

 

It was almost odd, the way Kyungsoo somehow appeared in front of him each time he allowed himself to think about how long it had been since they had last seen each other. He was wearing a white shirt this time, his messenger bag slung over his shoulder as he headed towards the counter, throwing a glance around him once. Their gaze accidentally met and Baekhyun felt a smile spreading on his lips, mirrored on Kyungsoo’s face as the other stopped in his tracks as if surprised and clueless about what to do as soon as he saw Baekhyun. However, he simply nodded as a form of greeting and continued walking towards the counter to order a drink. It was such a lame thing to do, nodding to someone to greet them but somehow, Baekhyun found it endearing and couldn’t take his eyes off Kyungsoo even if Yerim was still saying something to him, her gaze still lost somewhere on her fumbling hands.

 

Kyungsoo didn’t make conversation with the barista, he only gave the man a polite smile as he ordered and waited for his drink to be ready before taking it and heading towards a table on the opposite corner of the room where there wasn’t as many patrons. He had ordered something that looked like Iced Americano and Baekhyun smiled. He had been right.

 

"There’s a party tomorrow, are you gonna be there?"

 

Yerim’s question pulled him out of his thoughts and he looked at her, glancing at Kyungsoo from time to time again.

 

"I don’t think so. I have an essay due Monday and I haven’t been able to properly start working on it yet," he replied, furrowing his eyebrows at the disappointment in Yerim’s face. "But if I decide to go at the last minute, I’ll see you there."

 

That seemed to lift her mood up a little and Baekhyun glanced back at Kyungsoo, watching as he seemingly turned his laptop on, taking a sip of his drink before immediately starting to type on his keyboard.

 

"I actually don’t really like parties that much but Sooyoung will probably want to go and–"

 

"I’m sorry, Yerim," he suddenly cut her off, taking a sudden decision and giving her an apologetic smile. "I saw my friend just there and we have to work on something so I should go with him, it’s important."

 

Disappointment instantly filled her eyes up but she simply nodded, seemingly understanding enough for Baekhyun to like her a little bit more. He gave her a bright smile, telling her that they’d see each other again soon before gathering his stuff, shoving everything into his backpack and grabbing his still mostly full cup before standing up and walking towards Kyungsoo without another word. Warning Jongdae would be useless, Yerim would probably tell them where he was and it wasn’t like he was leaving altogether either, he would only be a few tables away from them.

 

"What a surprise, I didn’t think we’d ever hang out in the same places," was his greeting as he stood in front of Kyungsoo’s table, a hand grabbing the chair but not pulling it out yet. 

 

He didn’t know whether the other would accept his company and usually Baekhyun wouldn’t care but this was Kyungsoo. The latter didn’t seem to have even expected Baekhyun to approach him since he had looked up at him with wide eyes as soon as Baekhyun had spoken, fingers momentarily freezing on his keyboard.

 

"What are you doing here?" the other asked, voice indeed tainted with faint traces of surprise.

 

"What do you expect me to do in a coffee shop?" he snorted.

 

"No, dumbass," Kyungsoo rolled his eyes and Baekhyun oddly didn’t even feel offended by it. He had gotten used to it in the short time they had spent together over the past few days. "I mean why are you here and not with your friends over there?"

 

"It was getting boring," he simply shrugged. Conversing with Yerim had really started to get boring but something told him that it wasn’t the only reason why he was standing here right now. He didn’t let the other know though and simply gave him a wide smile. "You’d make better company. Can I crash with you? I’ll even buy you a muffin if you want."

 

The other simply looked at him for a few silent seconds, raising an eyebrow.

 

"Are you trying to hit on me?"

 

Baekhyun’s heart froze in his chest at those words, his eyes widening the slightest bit as he spluttered for the few seconds it took him to find the playful glint in Kyungsoo’s dark eyes, the rest of his features remaining serious like they always did whenever he was teasing Baekhyun. If there was something he had never gotten used to about Kyungsoo, it was how straightforward he could be sometimes, whether he was being serious or playful. And the fact that he was the only person who always managed to render him speechless for a few seconds.

 

However, Baekhyun quickly got a grip of himself, playing along with the other as he finally sat down across Kyungsoo, his smile turning as playful as the glint in Kyungsoo’s eyes.

 

"Do you want me to hit on you?" he retorted even if his chest felt weird at the unexpected turn of their conversation. It was a game though, Kyungsoo unexpectedly seemed to like this kind of game.

 

"I’m just saying, I’m not as easy as all those girls who play innocent around you while you sweet-talk them," the other simply replied, a corner of his lips tugging up into that faintly amused smile as his gaze fall back to his laptop’s screen. It was odd but Baekhyun found himself thinking that he had missed that smile.

 

"Oh, I know that. You’re probably not innocent at all. Quiet people are always the wildest," he shrugged, letting his gaze playfully trail over the other as if he was observing him before he lowered his voice the slightest bit to add something else. "And the kinkiest."

 

Kyungsoo’s gaze fell on him again, swirls of amusement still gleaming in his dark orbs.

 

"And how do you know for sure that this applies to me?" he asked and was Baekhyun imagining things or was his voice a tad lower than it usually was?

 

"You have a soundproof studio in your apartment, that’s kinda kinky and could be used for not-so-innocent things. Have you ever fucked someone in that studio?" he questioned, curiosity and innocence allying in his voice just enough not to overthrow the mirth in it.

 

Kyungsoo simply looked at him for a few silent seconds, Baekhyun’s amused gaze meeting his equally amused one and watching as it seemed to darken for a split second during which Baekhyun felt himself pulled in. He could feel it, that thing that so often danced between them but that Baekhyun had never really been able to put a name on. It was heavier than usual, stronger as it pulled him in and he felt himself letting go. 

 

However, Kyungsoo blinked and it was gone all at once as his eyes dropped to his laptop again.

 

"I’ll allow you to stay with me if you stay silent and refrain from saying anything crude or annoying. I have homework to do," he finally said, ignoring Baekhyun’s question and letting his voice take a more serious edge even if he could still decipher the amusement in it.

 

Like an obedient and good friend, Baekhyun simply grinned at him, bringing a hand up to his face and passing it against his lips as if he was zipping them up to let the other know that he would be completely silent.

 

He merely respected Kyungsoo’s condition to his sitting with him and even if he spent a good ten seconds observing the other without Kyungsoo even looking back at him as he was focusing on whatever he was writing on his laptop, Baekhyun still stayed silent. It felt nice to be sitting with Kyungsoo even if it was entirely silent and Baekhyun would usually do anything in his power to just make some noise but this time, he really didn’t mind. It was almost soothing and as he watched Kyungsoo work on his homework, he pulled his own laptop out of his backpack and decided to use the calm that Kyungsoo always poured over him to work on his own assignment since he hadn’t been able to do it earlier thanks to his best friend’s inconsiderate behavior.

 

He had already started working on the outline of the essay earlier so he tried perfecting it, simply listening to the noise Kyungsoo’s fingers made as they continuously tapped on the keyboard, only stopping from time to time when Kyungsoo frowned at his screen or took a sip of his drink. Baekhyun did the same thing, working on his essay more than he had thought he would and in no time, he was done with the outline and had started working on the actual essay, going through the introductory paragraph and starting to breach into his first main axis. He had told Kyungsoo that he was with him only because he was bored with his other three friends and maybe he has expected the other to actually talk to him but he also didn’t mind silently working together. Kyungsoo’s presence had an odd but nice calming effect on him.

 

His productive streak was broken after a while, however, when he heard footsteps slowly approaching them and stopping right next to their table. He looked up, a bit disoriented when his gaze landed on Jongdae, Sooyoung, and Yerim. 

 

"Working on your essay?" Jongdae asked and only then did Baekhyun hear Kyungsoo’s typing stop.

 

"Yeah, I’m trying to," he replied with a light smile when his gaze met Yerim’s before he looked at Kyungsoo who was observing the three others silently.

 

Yerim didn’t even glance at him but he saw Sooyoung smiling at him when their eyes met and Kyungsoo returned it with a faint, polite smile that he gave Jongdae too when the latter grinned at him as well.

 

"We were thinking of going to a bar, I thought you might want to come with us," Jongdae said still with that same smile as he focused back on Baekhyun before looking at Kyungsoo again. "You could come with us too if you want, Kyungsoo."

 

It wasn’t surprising of Jongdae to invite Kyungsoo, his best friend was as friendly as he was and he knew it wasn’t an offer made out of politeness either, there was genuine interest and curiosity in Jongdae’s eyes. Baekhyun was suddenly reminded of all the time he had spent talking about Kyungsoo to Jongdae and the latter’s constant wiggling eyebrows whenever they caught a glimpse of Kyungsoo in the school hallways. He didn’t even have to think twice before giving his reply.

 

"Thanks but we actually have homework to do and we agreed on finishing it up today together," he explained, giving an apologetic smile to Yerim when she instantly seemed to deflate. He did his best to ignore the sly grin spreading on Jongdae’s face. 

 

"Are you sure?" the little shit asked, drawing his question out obnoxiously as he continuously glanced at Kyungsoo who remained silent all the while, merely observing the situation.

 

"Yeah!" he said, hoping that Jongdae would understand from his eyes that Baekhyun needed him to shut that mouth of his right away. He glanced at the time on his laptop screen before frowning up at his best friend when noticing that only a little more than an hour had passed since Baekhyun had invaded Kyungsoo’s table. "It’s like 4PM, Jongdae. Why are you going to a bar so early?"

 

The other merely rolled his eyes. 

 

"Baekhyun, you know that there’s no fixated hour to–"

 

"Get drunk and have fun, yes, I know," Baekhyun finished for the other, laughing softly. "It’ll be without me this time though, sorry," he repeated, catching Yerim’s gaze and giving her a light, teasing smile. "You should be careful there though, Yerim. A pretty girl like you would attract too many eyes so be careful, alright?" he asked, half playful and half genuinely concerned about her. He really didn’t trust Jongdae to pay enough attention to her.

 

Yerim smiled as if he had given her tomorrow’s winning lottery numbers, nodding eagerly as her cheeks turned pink once again. She was adorable so Baekhyun chuckled softly before turning to Jongdae who pronounced a few last words before all three of them waved at both Kyungsoo and him and finally walked away.

 

"So that’s how you break hearts," Kyungsoo finally broke his silence once they were out of the coffee shop, his gaze remaining on his laptop as he resumed typing.

 

"What do you mean?" Baekhyun asked, confused by the other’s words and his unfamiliar tone. It sounded slightly accusing but at the same time a bit like any other observant comment he made about Baekhyun.

 

At his words, Kyungsoo stopped typing and finally looked at Baekhyun for a few silent seconds, his eyebrows furrowing a bit.

 

"You’re really clueless about it, aren’t you?" he then muttered, only adding up to Baekhyun’s confusion.

 

"What are you talking about?"

 

"Nothing," he finally sighed before leaning back against his chair and giving his whole attention to Baekhyun. The latter couldn’t decipher the look in his eyes, however. "Why did you lie to them? We don’t have anything to work on together right now and you seem to get along just fine with _that_ girl."

 

Baekhyun hadn't thought that the other would actually question him about it but he simply shrugged, not taken off-guard either despite the odd tone he was using.

 

"I just didn’t feel like getting drunk or witnessing Jongdae flirting with Sooyoung so disgustingly. It’s better to stay with you, more entertaining."

 

And it was true. He hadn’t felt like hanging out with them at a bar, getting drunk and forcing himself to smile at Yerim because it made her happy. Staying with Kyungsoo was much more pleasant. Even if they hadn’t even uttered a single word to each other for more than an hour. He hoped Kyungsoo wouldn’t question that because he really had no answer to give him as to why he thought sitting with him in silence was more entertaining than spending time with his best friend, his best friend’s current crush, and a pretty girl.

 

Fortunately, Kyungsoo didn’t seem to have that intention and they silently sized each other up for a few more seconds before the other shook his head, lips quirking up into that faint but handsome smile. He looked away from Baekhyun and the latter felt himself going slack at once, not even having realized until then that he had been tensed up all along. He took a deep breath in, confusion coming back to him like an old song stuck in his head when Kyungsoo suddenly lowered the lid of his laptop, closing it off.

 

"Let’s go work on our song then. At least you wouldn’t be totally lying this way," he simply said, still with that same smile that was mirrored on Baekhyun’s face. 

 

His heart jumped in delight in his ribcage, like a child that was just given a birthday gift, and it was odd for him to feel so happy so suddenly but he merely blamed it on the fact that it had been a while since they had last worked on their song together. 

 

A week could be a long time, after all, and it had felt like an awfully long week whenever Kyungsoo wasn’t texting him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They had been entirely silent on their way to Kyungsoo’s apartment or rather, Kyungsoo had been silent and hadn’t replied to any of Baekhyun’s random questions, simply humming or nodding to let him know he was listening. It hadn’t taken long for Baekhyun to simply shut up and wait for the other’s rather sudden bad mood to cool off even if he had been smiling right before they had left the coffee shop.

 

Fortunately, Kyungsoo had seemed to relax as soon as they stepped foot into his apartment and oddly, Baekhyun noticed that he still felt as happy to be there as he had the first time he had visited the other to work on their project. Kyungsoo had offered him something to drink again and Baekhyun had refused again, causing the other to tease him about the fact that he really did not like coffee at all and only then had the worry planted somewhere in his mind vanished. They bickered a little bit on their way to the studio room and as soon as he had stepped inside, Baekhyun had playfully wiggled his eyebrows to remind the other of his words about this particular room back at the coffee shop. Kyungsoo had rolled his eyes at him but had still chuckled while telling him not to be a kid.

 

However, when they had both settled down, Baekhyun on the couch and Kyungsoo on that rolling chair again, all air of playfulness had been swept away for them to focus on their song.

 

"I’ve actually tried working on it more since the last time I sent you something and I don’t know, it doesn’t really fit with what I have in mind. I don’t think it fits with what you have in mind either," Kyungsoo said, eyebrows furrowed in the familiar way they always were whenever he was focusing on something.

 

"You did sound rather uneasy when we talked about it for the past few days," Baekhyun hummed since Kyungsoo was right, it was a nice melody and the piano was one of his favorite instruments but it just didn’t sound right to him, for whatever reason.

 

"I thought back on it last night actually, after you mentioned maybe trying something else," he continued, pursing his lips. "I know you really liked the melody and it sounds really nice when you hummed it on the last recording you sent me by phone and I think you’d be able to find matching lyrics more easily if you like the melody."

 

"You’re right, it could be easier," he said even if no, nothing about that side of the song was easy right now. "But if you don’t like it, we shouldn’t force it. It would be better for both of us to like the song we’re making."

 

"You’re right and I do like the small melody you found so I tried something else with it," he said, standing up to walk towards the keyboard on the other side of the room.

 

"What?" Baekhyun asked, impatiently.

 

"The melody doesn’t sound too nice on the piano because it’s something that’s too soft, too slow and kind of awkward on the piano so I thought why not try with another instrument?" he explained, grabbing the acoustic guitar next to his desk.

 

"The guitar?" he asked, observing Kyungsoo as he walked back to him and plopped down on the chair again. 

 

"You wanted a happy song so I tweaked our melody a little bit because I could tell that it didn’t sound happy enough for you. I guess it’s difficult for me to make a happy song with the piano," he chuckled softly, that low sound echoing somewhere in Baekhyun’s chest and giving him tingles.

 

"You managed to make it into something that would suit the guitar?" he asked, gaze dropping to the instrument as Kyungsoo rested it on his lap, fingers positioned against the strings so naturally it was almost as if he had done this thousands of times before.  
  
Kyungsoo looked good with a guitar. His fingers looked nice against the strings, his hands were small and yet they held the instrument so confidently, and his muscled arms were a delightful sight to Baekhyun’s eyes, a sight he had never paid to much attention to until now. He couldn’t deny the fact that Kyungsoo was probably actually working out anymore.

 

However, before he even had the time to say something else and blurt a surprisingly inappropriate thought out first, his gaze was pulled towards Kyungsoo’s fingers as he strummed the strings once.

 

"Just listen," was all he said before letting Baekhyun see and hear something that he had never thought he craved so much until that exact moment.

 

Kyungsoo was indeed a natural guitar player, his eyes closing for a few seconds as his fingers strummed the strings, his other hand caressing the handle so gently yet so confidently, as if he was leading every single note produced by the instrument, which he did. It sounded nice, it was the melody Baekhyun had hummed into his phone before sending it to Kyungsoo only a few days ago and it sounded wonderful. It sounded like joy, a bit of shyness, maybe like a flustered chuckle and a whispered confession at the start of a day, when the sun was the only witness of two people admitting what their heart held for each other. 

 

And it lasted only for what Baekhyun figured out would be the chorus of the song, not longer than fifteen seconds, but it sounded so nice and somehow, it allied both what he was and what Kyungsoo was. It sounded so much better than it would on the piano and Baekhyun found himself loving it more than he had thought he would when putting together the fact that they had such distinct styles and tastes.

 

"So, how was it?"

 

Kyungsoo’s voice pulled him out of the daze the song had put him into and only then did he realize that Kyungsoo was looking at him with something that looked like nervousness in his eyes, his teeth sunk into his plump lower lip in a clear indication that he had been waiting for Baekhyun’s reaction for more than a few seconds now.

 

"I love it," Baekhyun simply said, lips blossoming into a wide and genuine smile that seemed to be all Kyungsoo had wanted to see since the next second, that beautiful heart shaped smile was offered to Baekhyun.

 

"I’m glad you like it then," he replied gently, his shoulder dropping a bit as if he was finally relaxing after nervous seconds. It was a bit endearing and it was really weird, Baekhyun seemed to be more observant than he usually was whenever Kyungsoo was with him.

 

"It really sounds nice, it’s so simple but I think it would be the perfect kind of melody for the theme we talked about," he continued, words almost meshed together as he perked up, barely keeping himself from jumping on the couch from excitement. "I’m guessing you want to throw away the other parts we worked on but that’s okay, I’m sure we can find something that’s more fitting with those few seconds as a base. It’s gonna be really amazing!"

 

"I think you just passed from a dynamic child to an excited puppy," Kyungsoo chuckled softly, fingers steaming on the strings once as if out of habit.

 

"I mean, if you think I’m a puppy, I’m definitely a puppy that deserves a reward," Baekhyun grinned, playfully wiggling his eyebrows at the other who chuckled again, louder this time. He seemed happy.

 

"Why would you suddenly deserve a reward?"

 

"Because this is probably the only happy song you’ve written until now and it’s happening thanks to me!" 

 

Kyungsoo simply looked at him for a second before sighing softly and shaking his head in what Baekhyun knew to be mock exasperation as indicated by the trace of a smile on his lips.

 

"Fine, you’re right. It’s the first bright song I’ve written in years. What do you want?"

 

Baekhyun actually had no idea what he wanted as it had been spontaneous and he hadn’t even expected Kyungsoo to give in so easily so he hummed for a few seconds, observing the other. His gaze fell back on the guitar and his smile widened.

 

"You should sing for me while playing guitar. You’re really good at it and I haven’t heard you sing while I already sang for you once," he then asked gently.

 

"You call your murder of a hit song singing?" the other deadpanned, the glint in his eyes playful.

 

"That’s only a detail. Just sing for me, please?" he asked again, leaning forward a little bit and looking at the other with a hopeful glint in his eyes.

 

He didn’t know why he suddenly wanted to hear Kyungsoo sing, maybe it was just curiosity, maybe it was just because he wanted to add another one of Kyungsoo’s sounds to his odd mental repertory, or maybe it was because Kyungsoo looked so nice when playing guitar. Either way, when the other sighed softly and shook his head again, he knew that he had won.

 

"What do you want me to play?"

 

"Anything you want," he shrugged, his heartbeat oddly picking up its pace as he watched Kyungsoo close his eyes and take a deep breath in as if he was nervous.

 

Kyungsoo started strumming on his guitar and it wasn’t a bright song this time, it wasn’t a bright song that brought a smile on Baekhyun’s face at all, it wasn’t a melody that spoke of young, joyful, and innocent love at all. It was a soft melody that sounded pained, wounded, and like a scar that would never heal. It sounds sorrowful and when Kyungsoo parted his lips, the first thing that hit Baekhyun was how rich, how deep, and how gentle his voice sounded as he sang about being different, being not good enough, and wanting his loved one to accept him the way he was, even if all he did was hurt them.

 

He had a nice voice and Baekhyun had been right, Kyungsoo was really a ballad kind of person, both in his appearance and in his rendition of the emotions conveyed through the lyrics and the melody he played with his own fingers. He wasn’t just singing, he was _living_ the song, he was the sorrow in the lyrics, he was the regret in the melody, and he was the main character trapped in the lyrics that maybe he understood better than anyone else. He had a nice voice, however, a voice that sounded like melted chocolate, like a warm caress on Baekhyun’s nape in a cold winter night, like a gentle finger wiping away the tears that sometimes escaped him when he was unable to sleep at night and it was nearing daybreak, and it sounded like the sorrow Baekhyun hated so much but found himself lost in right at that exact moment.

 

Baekhyun hated ballads with every inch of his soul, he hated the way he could feel Kyungsoo’s fingers pinching his heart and not the strings of his guitar, he hated the way sadness spread through his veins with every hammering beat of his heart, and he hated how thick the lump that settled in his throat was. He hated it all but as Kyungsoo hit the last note of his sorrowful song, Baekhyun found himself yearning for the other to never stop singing. He also felt the same song beating loudly in his chest. Or maybe it wasn’t Kyungsoo’s song, maybe it was his heart’s own fast paced, wild hammering that had suddenly started as soon as Kyungsoo parted his lips and sang.

 

Silence settled over them when Kyungsoo quieted down and took a few seconds to open his eyes, as if it was difficult for him to get himself out of the song, but Baekhyun had never once looked away from him.

 

"It was really beautiful," he whispered, unable to push himself into being as loud as he would usually be when Kyungsoo looked completely bare in front of him, with nothing but a guitar in his hands and a sorrowful song on his lips.

 

 "Thank you," he whispered back, gaze finding Baekhyun’s and never losing it again. 

 

"It’s a nice song," he found himself saying. He had heard it before, it was called _I’m Different_ and he didn’t remember which group it belonged to but he recalled Jongdae dramatically blasting it through their whole apartment for two days straight after going through a break up with a fling of a mere week. "You seem to relate to it. Have you been in that situation before? Loving someone but only hurting them because you’re different from what they deserve?"

 

There was no way Kyungsoo could sing that song with so much emotion if he hadn’t felt those exact emotions in his own chest at least once.

 

"Maybe," the other sighed before chucking softly. It didn’t sound happy though, it didn’t sound sad either, just empty and maybe a little surprised, as if he hadn’t expected Baekhyun of all people to ask him such a question. "I guess I do relate to it a little bit," he finally said.

 

"How so?" he couldn’t help but ask, voice still lower than usual as if they were sharing a secret. Maybe they were.

 

Kyungsoo observed him for a few silent seconds, looking for something in Baekhyun’s eyes and visibly finding it because the next second, he simply let himself go, fingers going slack on the instrument.

 

"I had a relationship before, we met in high school and broke up a few months into our first year of college. We just kind of fucked everything up," he explained, gaze lost somewhere on Baekhyun’s chest, maybe lost in a memory in his own head.

 

"You loved that person," he stated more than asked, something squeezing his heart as he pronounced those words. Yet another difference between them. Baekhyun had never loved someone.

 

"I guess I did," he muttered, a bitter chuckle laced with his words. He didn’t look in pain, though, he looked like someone recalling an old injury from the past. "I did love him. I thought he loved me too, but maybe he didn’t love me as much as I thought he did."

 

"He’s the one who broke it off," he once again stated gently, heart squeezed tighter in his chest. He hated this. He hated it. He hated seeing Kyungsoo unhappy. He hated it more than he’d hate seeing anyone else unhappy.

 

"He did, I guess I was different from what he needed in his life. I wanted a love that would last forever and he… I guess he wanted something else and when I understood that, I started hating him and loving him at the same time. We hurt each other a lot, I hurt him more than he hurt me."

 

"You believe in forever?" he couldn’t help but ask.

 

Forever. It was such a weird word, an odd concept. It was the subject of all those love songs he couldn’t bear to listen to. It was the one word that Baekhyun had never been able to understand and relate to.

 

"You don’t?" Kyungsoo asked in return, gaze finding Baekhyun back again.

 

"I’m not sure," he replied hesitantly. "I’m not sure I understand what forever actually is. Everyone talks about it, everyone says they want to be loved by someone forever but I just… I just don’t get it," he tried explaining despite having a difficult time understanding his own thoughts.

 

"It’s an odd concept, forever," Kyungsoo hummed softly but his lips curved into that small, genuine smile and Baekhyun took in every single word that was about to fall off his lips. "I don’t think there’s just a single, unique forever."

 

"What do you mean?" he asked confusedly, gaze locked into Kyungsoo’s.

 

"There isn’t just a single forever. What’s forever even like? Who even has the power and the right to tell you what forever is? How long does it last? When does it start? No one can answer those questions because forever isn’t a fact, it’s just a concept, a dream, something we made up with our own minds and something that doesn’t exist amongst defined rules. It isn’t defined by anything but your own feelings," Kyungsoo started, his gentle, soothing voice coaxing Baekhyun into listening to him as if his life depended on it, and maybe it did. He had a gentle smile on his lips, a handsome one, one Baekhyun liked to look at. "I think everyone has their own forever. You can define forever on your own. You can start your forever with someone, you can start your relationship with someone and it will last forever because it happened and maybe you ended it but it already happened, it will forever be marked into the universe. It will be marked into the universe’s forever but it will be just another chapter for you. You can start your forever with someone and you can end it whenever you want, when you’re tired of it or when you don’t enjoy every second of it anymore. Then, you can just start a new forever with someone else. Maybe you’ll also be stuck in the forever you started with someone alone while that person has already moved on. Forever isn’t a defined amount of time, it’s a feeling."

 

"I don’t really get it," he said even if he did. He did get it. Maybe he was just scared of understanding something he had hated for so long.

 

"Maybe you’ve just never experienced it," Kyungsoo smiled at him, shrugging a little bit. "When you kiss someone, doesn’t it last forever? Doesn’t it feel like a short second and a whole life time at the same time if you kiss that person with the right feelings?"

 

"I’ve never felt forever when I kissed someone. Have you?" Baekhyun heard himself whisper, voice as gentle as the first notes of a lullaby meant to tame a child’s fear and lure them into a gentle slumber filled with nothing but sweet melodies to dance around with instead.

 

"I did. It was beautiful," Kyungsoo muttered, his eyes sparkling like a night sky as he looked at Baekhyun. It was a clear, summer sky studded with diamonds that called for the melody wrapped around Baekhyun. He felt it grow lighter, that ballad he saw in the mirror whenever he looked at himself and lowered his guard. "Forever ended for me, though, and its end is never as beautiful as its start. Love is forever but you can be the one to decide how long your forever is going to last."

 

"Do you want to experience it again? Forever?" Baekhyun asked and amidst the sudden, crazy hammering of his heart against his ribcage, he wasn’t sure what he was actually asking to Kyungsoo.

 

The other simply smiled at him, though, and Baekhyun saw it, the same ballad as his own, the same notes of sorrow twirling around Kyungsoo in a crazy dance Baekhyun was so familiar with. His smile was gentle, however. Gentle and free.

 

"If I find someone who can just take my hand and pull me into it without me even noticing, maybe."

 

"You make forever sound really beautiful," someone whispered, a voice filled with emotion, a bit choked up but melodious. A voice that pulled the corners of Kyungsoo’s lips up into a delighted yet saddened smile. It took Baekhyun a second to realize that voice belonged to him.

 

"It’s a beautiful thing and I hope you’ll experience it too one day."

 

Baekhyun heard his own voice in his head, a whisper wishing for the same thing.

 

As silence settled over them again, as they simply smiled at each other like two people sharing a secret they didn’t even know about, as his gaze dived into Kyungsoo’s for what felt like forever, Baekhyun found himself understanding for the first time in his whole life. He found himself understanding that the way his heart sang a gentle, sorrowful, light, and joyful melody was what all those love songs he hated so much were about.

 

Forever still sounded like an awfully long time, an unsure concept, and something that he probably would take a while to completely figure out but for a split second, he found himself thinking that if Kyungsoo would be willing to be with him through it, he wouldn’t mind being stuck in Forever.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fear wasn’t something Baekhyun was familiar with. Or maybe it was something he was too familiar with, maybe it was something that seeped into his blood whenever he heard someone sing about broken hearts and loneliness.

 

After leaving Kyungsoo’s apartment that day, their conversation lingered in his mind for the rest of the night and for most of the following day, Kyungsoo’s words endlessly echoing in his mind, like a song stuck in his head. However, what shined brighter in his mind was the thought that struck him right after that conversation, the thought that maybe he wouldn’t mind Kyungsoo dragging him into a moment that would last forever between them. When he coupled that with his odd behavior around the other, it wasn’t difficult for Baekhyun to figure out what he was exactly starting to feel.

 

He had heard this in a lot of love songs before, your heart beating wildly whenever you saw that person, happiness wrapping all around you whenever they were near you, your thoughts unconsciously chasing them, and your soul lulled by their presence. It wasn’t difficult to figure out what this was all about because Baekhyun might be clueless sometimes, but he wasn’t entirely stupid and Jongdae had dragged him into enough movies and forced him to listen to enough love songs for Baekhyun to realize his own mistake.

 

The only reason why he had chosen to partner up with Kyungsoo for this project was because he thought that the other wouldn’t be like everyone else, maybe he wouldn’t fall for Baekhyun’s unconscious habit of doing his best to make someone happy until they clung to that happiness and never wanted to end it. He had chosen Kyungsoo specifically because he was scared of breaking another heart but at the end, he was probably the one about to get his heart broken. He was the one doing what he hated the most. He was the one running straight into something that would end bad. Because there was no way this would amount to anything good, they were so different, too different, and until now, Kyungsoo had never shown anything close to what Baekhyun seemed to feel for the other. Although, even if he did, Baekhyun would probably end up breaking his heart. That was what always happened. 

 

He was scared of turning into the main character of one of those ballads he tried avoiding so much and the worst thing about it was that he knew he didn’t want to stop it. The smartest thing to do would be to avoid Kyungsoo but he couldn’t do that and not only because they were project partners and had to work on their song as they had only a month left to complete it but because he didn’t want to. Kyungsoo made him feel happy. He made Baekhyun feel things he had never experienced before and maybe it wasn’t anything close to Forever yet, maybe it was just the start of a tiny little crush that could still vanish with time but Baekhyun knew that the other made him happy. It felt soothing, nice, and so fulfilling to be at the receiving end of Kyungsoo’s heart-shaped smile, a smile that Baekhyun had never seen the other direct to anyone else until now. It felt delightful to be able to spend time with Kyungsoo despite their clashing personalities and it felt so _new_ to be able to talk to the other without fearing anything bad happening to him.

 

Because as much as he feared how this would all end for his poor heart, Baekhyun also wanted to experience this. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to feel Forever, maybe it just wasn’t meant to be, and maybe he was the only one to feel this way but he didn’t want to stop this feeling.

 

It was confusing but Baekhyun remembered hearing in a song that love was confusing. Was this love, though? He wasn’t sure.

 

He wasn’t sure about anything anymore and therefore, it had seemed like a good idea to accept when Jongdae had asked him whether he would come to that party the next day or not.

 

As he stood in the middle of a wide room full of people, loud music, alcohol, and familiarity, Baekhyun finally felt the confusion and the fear slipping away from him, comfort settling in as soon as he felt in his element. Spending his Saturday nights partying was something that he did often, something that he was used to, and something that he didn’t have to fear because this was familiar. The person hosting this party was familiar, the people dancing around him with bottles of beer or glasses of other alcoholic beverage in their hand were familiar, the loud music booming through the whole house was familiar, and the people who greeted him, who stood to exchange a few words with him, or who asked him for a dance were familiar. This was familiar, Baekhyun didn’t have to fear this.

 

And he enjoyed it, he enjoyed the freedom that partying gave him, he enjoyed the heat of the alcohol running through his veins after a few bottles of beer and shots of something he didn’t even remember the name of.

 

He also enjoyed the way Yerim smiled at him and followed him around. She looked happy. Maybe it was just the alcohol, but she still looked happy and that was enough for Baekhyun to feel happy as well. Maybe he had drunk too much as well but he could take his alcohol well, it wasn’t a problem for him. Even if he had been there for only a little more than hour and he already felt as if he was reaching the end of the night.

 

"What do you think I should name my dog?"

 

Yerim’s voice snatched him out of his thoughts and he looked down at her. Her wide, red-painted smile reached her eyes. She looked happy. Baekhyun wished he could be happy like her too.

 

"Your dog should have a cute name that would fit its cute owner," he hummed, giving her a playful smile as he watched her smile widening even more, her cheeks flushing a bit, probably because of what she had in her big, red cup. There was a lot of red. Her smile was red. It wasn’t heart-shaped, though.

 

"You should help me name it when I get it then," she giggled drunkenly, dragging Baekhyun into it, a clear sign that he was less sober than he thought he was.

 

"I should!" he agreed, bringing his bottle of beer up to his lips to take a sip. It was bitter. He didn’t like beer. "By the way, how was it at the bar yesterday? I hope no one bothered you," he added just to keep the conversation going. She had a nice voice, it didn’t wrap all around him and warmed him up the way Kyungsoo’s voice did but it still kept him grounded.

 

"It was great but kinda boring without you," she shrugged, her wide blown eyes looking into Baekhyun’s as her lower lip jutted out in a faint pout. She was drunk. She had filled her cup three times since Baekhyun had stumbled upon her close to half an hour ago. Kyungsoo’s lower lip always looked so plump without him even needing to pout. "Actually, everything is boring without you."

 

"Is it? That’s bad for you, it means you can’t have fun without me," he chuckled softly, barely registering his own words at this point while he finished up his beer and leaned to grab another bottle from the table they were standing right in front of.

 

"I can’t!" she eagerly agreed. "I always feel much happier whenever we’re talking."

 

"I’m glad I can make you happy, it makes me happy too," he muttered, scrunching his nose a little bit as he took a sudden, big gulp of beer that left a sour taste in his mouth and burned his throat a little. He wondered if Kyungsoo liked beer. He probably didn’t. He looked like the kind to prefer fancier drinks. Baekhyun was always right about Kyungsoo.

 

"Really?" Yerim asked and Baekhyun wasn’t sure what he understood from his words and why her eyes were suddenly sparkling so much but if she was happy, it was okay. "Do you know what would make me even happier?"

 

"What?" he asked, smiling down at her when she stepped even closer to him and rested her warm hand on his arm. He looked down at it. Her fingers were long and slender, her skin looked soft, her hands weren’t as calloused as Kyungsoo’s had looked when he was playing guitar to Baekhyun.

 

"A kiss," she whispered, or maybe screamed because the music was loud and there was no way Baekhyun could hear anyone if they only whispered.

 

However, he did hear her words and the smile slipped off his lips right away.

 

"A kiss?" he repeated, stepping away from her. He didn’t want to kiss her. Her lips weren’t heart shaped, her smile wasn’t either. "I’m sorry, Yerim. I can’t," he tried telling her, giving her an apologetic smile.

 

However, she was drunk and as soon as Baekhyun stepped away from her, her face fell and her eyes sparkled more, not because of a smile this time.

 

"You don’t want to kiss me?" she asked and Baekhyun heard her voice breaking through the loud bass booming through the room and the laughter coming from behind Yerim. 

 

He felt something squeezing his heart. She was about to cry. He didn’t want her to cry. Why couldn’t she be happy? Why did he hurt her again?

 

"It’s not that I don’t want to!" he quickly said, shaking his head. He didn’t want her to be sad. "It’s just…"

 

"Am I not pretty enough for you?" she asked, her lower lip trembling a bit. He hated it. He hated seeing people cry, especially girls. But he didn’t want this.

 

"No, you’re really pretty," he tried comforting her, a lump settling in his throat when a tear finally escaped the pool that had gathered in her eyes. He felt himself drowning in that single tear and he stepped closer to her again, wiping it away with a gentle finger. "You’re one of the prettiest girls I know."

 

"Then why don’t you want to kiss me?" she asked again, her small hand grabbing his arm tightly. "I like you a lot. I thought you liked me too. You should kiss me, why are you rejecting me? I like you."

 

Her words turned his blood into ice and this was familiar, these words were ones Baekhyun had heard so many times in his life but he was drunk and the alcohol sloshing in his veins made her voice echo in her head. She was crying. Baekhyun was tired of making people cry. He didn’t want this. He didn’t want this at all but he would be happier if she smiled at him instead of crying. She shouldn’t cry, she should smile. He didn’t matter that much if she’d be happy. 

 

She was only asking for a kiss anyway. It wasn’t such a big deal. Baekhyun had kissed many people in his life. He had never felt Forever when kissing any of them but it wasn’t such a big deal. He could kiss her if it meant she’d be happy.

 

She would be happy, therefore Baekhyun leaned forward, pressing his lips into hers in a small, gentle peck. Her lips were soft, cushiony. It was a mere contact between their lips, nothing that went too far, a small peck and yet, it felt awfully wrong. He didn’t like it. He wanted to pull away. However, her small hand tightened its grip on his arm and he let it go on for a few seconds longer before finally pulling away and taking a deep breath.

 

She was smiling at him, her eyes sparkling but not with tears, with gleams of happiness. That happiness didn’t reach Baekhyun’s heart, however, and maybe this had been a mistake. It was okay, though. She was happy, grinning at him, leaning her forehead against his chest while hugging him. He stayed frozen against her. He hated this.

 

She pulled away from him, his hazy mind only understanding what was happening when he saw Yerim hugging someone else in front of him. He had seen her before. Seunghwan? He wasn’t sure, he didn’t care, they were talking animatedly as if they hadn’t seen each other in a while and Baekhyun was thankful because he could breath easily now that she wasn’t invading his personal space or pressing her lips against his. 

 

He brought his bottle up to his lips, throwing his head back and drinking it all in one go, his throat burning, his mind sloshing around for a bit when he lowered his hand to let the empty bottle rest on the table, next to the other green, empty corpses there. He hated beer but he liked dancing. He wanted to get away from Yerim so he did, walking away with wobbly legs as he headed towards the middle of the room where people had gathered to dance, to jump around, and let the alcohol and the joy take over their body. He liked this song. He liked dancing in the middle of a crowd who didn’t care about whoever was around them.

 

As he seeped into the crowd and staring moving his body along to the rhythm, his gaze trailed around and he observed his surroundings even if he had a hard time properly focusing on anyone. Suddenly, he wondered if Kyungsoo liked to dance. He never attended any party so he probably didn’t. Kyungsoo was more of a bar kind of person. He wondered if Kyungsoo would look as awkward as the boy dancing a few feet away from Baekhyun looked when dancing. How would he style his hair if he attended a party? Would he have not even bothered like the girl dancing with who seemed to be her partner for the night right in front of Baekhyun? Maybe he would simply sit and wait for the party to end like the person who was standing against the wall on Baekhyun’s left did, a seemingly full bottle of beer in his hand as he trailed his gaze around the whole room, as if the only thing he liked about this place was the people he could observe. That seemed like what Kyungsoo would do. 

 

Suddenly, that boy met his gaze and Baekhyun froze, his heart stopping for a second before hammering in his chest like a caged animal.

 

He would recognize those eyes anywhere. It was Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo who always magically appeared in front of Baekhyun whenever his thoughts chased him in his head.

 

And suddenly, Baekhyun felt the small tints of sadness in him vanishing away as something seemed to push him towards Kyungsoo, as if the latter’s gaze on him was enough to pull him forward and make him stumble on his wobbly legs as he walked to him as quickly as he could.

 

"Kyungsoo!" he grinned at the other, half-falling onto him and half throwing himself to the other in a  hug. He had missed him. They had seen each other just yesterday but Baekhyun had missed him. Was that what Jongdae’s favorite singer meant in her song about loving someone so much you missed them even when they were next to you? Baekhyun didn’t love Kyungsoo, though, did he? "What are you doing here?"

 

He felt warm hands settling on his waist as Kyungsoo stumbled backward a little bit but managed to keep the both of them balanced. He smelled nice. He smelled really nice and he was so warm. Baekhyun wasn’t cold but he liked that warmth. He pulled away to look at the other more properly, almost loosing his footing. Maybe he had drunk too much. Kyungsoo seemed to think he had drunk too much, he was frowning at Baekhyun.

 

"I was dragged here by my best friend," the other muttered, gaze trailing over Baekhyun as if to make sure he was okay. "Why are you so drunk?"

 

"You have a best friend?" was the only thing Baekhyun asked, frowning a little bit. He thought he was Kyungsoo’s only friend. Why did he have a best friend? Did he spend more time with that person than he did with Baekhyun? Probably. "Who?"

 

"I don’t think you know him, he’s not in our major. His name is Chanyeol," Kyungsoo replied, his hands hovering in front of him as if Baekhyun could fall any second. But Baekhyun wasn’t the kind to fall. He never fell. Not until Kyungsoo described falling as such a beautiful thing, at least.

 

"I’m glad he brought you here then!" he perked up, laughing softly as he let his gaze trail over Kyungsoo. He was wearing yet another black shirt and black jeans that hugged his thighs more than they usually did but what Baekhyun lingered on was the leather jacket he was sporting. He looked really handsome. Did he always look so handsome? "I’ve missed you a lot. You look really handsome. Wanna dance with me?" he asked and before even leaving the other the occasion to reply, he grabbed both of his hands in his and started tugging.

 

However, the other didn’t budge and even pulled Baekhyun closer to him instead. He stopped moving, looking at the other and stepping even closer.

 

"We’ve been texting the whole morning, how can you even miss me? And I don’t think you’re in a good enough state to dance right now, Baekhyun," Kyungsoo said and was that amusement in his eyes? 

 

"But I want to dance with you," he argued, frowning a bit. They really had been texting the whole morning but it wasn’t the same as seeing Kyungsoo in the flesh.

 

"We’re not going to dance," Kyungsoo said with a final tone even if he had that handsome smile on his face. The faint one. The slightly lopsided one. The one that sent shivers down Baekhyun’s spine.

 

"Fine, we’re not going to dance," he said softly because if not dancing was what Kyungsoo wanted then Baekhyun would follow along.

 

"Alcohol makes you so obedient," the other snorted softly but Baekhyun could barely register these words into his drunken mind when he felt Kyungsoo’s thumb rubbing gentle circles on his hand. It felt warm.

 

"I’m obedient. You should reward me," he mumbled, blinking a bit because two Kyungsoo were suddenly looking back at him.

 

"Another reward?" Kyungsoo laughed softly, his teeth sinking into his lower lip afterwards. Only one Kyungsoo was left when he blinked again. "What do you want this time?"

 

"A hug."

 

That seemed to be enough because Kyungsoo simply observed him for a second before his hands once agin slid around his waist, his arms circling Baekhyun’s body and bringing him against his chest. They had a similar height and it was nice as Baekhyun rested his chin on the other’s shoulder, nuzzling his nose into the hair behind Kyungsoo’s ear. It was nice. It was so warm.

 

"Baekhyun!"

 

That familiar voice sent a cold spike down his back, however, and when Baekhyun pulled away, holding onto Kyungsoo’s arm for balance, his gaze landed on Yerim. She was looking at him only, completely ignoring Kyungsoo like she had done yesterday at the coffee shop. He didn’t like that.

 

"Hey, Yerim," he still smiled, however, not wanting to hurt her.

 

"I lost you, where did you go?" she asked, whining a little bit. He glanced at Kyungsoo, meeting his gaze. He had beautiful eyes. His answer was delayed by a few seconds as he had trouble looking away from him and back at Yerim.

 

"I found Kyungsoo so I’m staying with him. You should go back with Seunghwan," he mumbled, hoping that she’d understand him. He could still feel her lips against his. It had felt cold, so different from Kyungsoo’s embrace a few seconds ago.

 

"Why would I go with Seunghwan? I want to spend time with you," she replied and maybe she was still as drunk as he was because she stammered on her words a little.

 

"I want to spend time with Kyungsoo," he replied, tired of yielding to her demands, tired of yielding to everyone’s demands. Couldn’t they allow him to spend time with someone he actually liked? Just for one night?

 

"But you like me," she frowned, her voice suddenly turning harsh as she glared at Kyungsoo who remained silent, visibly unimpressed as he met her gaze. He didn’t like her attitude with Kyungsoo but her words felt worse than that.

 

"You must have misunderstood me, Yerim," he said softly, pulling away from Kyungsoo completely and giving his whole attention to her. He didn’t like this. He didn’t like the way she tensed up, her glares like tiny needles to his heart. Was it happening again?

 

"You kissed me!" she reminded him, her voice gaining a bit in volume. He felt Kyungsoo stepping closer to him.

 

He should apologize. He definitely should apologize for kissing her. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. Her eyes were sparkling with tears again.

 

"You asked me to," was what he replied, however, because it was true. She had insisted and he could’ve said no but he hadn’t wanted her to cry. It seemed useless now, though.

 

"You kissed me after I told you that I liked you!" she insisted, stepping closer to him.

 

"You insisted and I refused but you still asked me to kiss you. You were about to cry! I just didn’t want to hurt you!" he finally snapped and her eyes widened at those words, her dark orbs glinting with rage and the same selfishly pained look Baekhyun was always given whenever this happened.

 

Something suddenly collided with his cheek, pain shooting through him and twirling his mind around even more. A slap. Again. Always. It always ended like this.

 

"You’re an asshole!" was her words and it sounded like the voices of a million people, echoing in Baekhyun’s head as he closed his eyes, his legs wobbling a bit as he brought a hand to his cheek.

 

He heard Kyungsoo say something but couldn’t decipher it, Yerim replying something followed by Kyungsoo’s harsh voice and finally a groan before he opened his eyes to see that Yerim wasn’t there anymore. When his gaze landed on Kyungsoo again, he was blurry and something wet was trailing down Baekhyun’s cheeks. He hated this. He hated this so much and it was all his fault but he didn’t know how to stop this from happening.

 

He wasn’t a bad person, he wasn’t an asshole or a manipulative jerk or anything that Yerim now thought him to be. He had only wanted to make her happy.

 

"Are you okay?"

 

Kyungsoo’s voice was like a gentle melody in the midst of a cacophony of jumbled thoughts and Baekhyun clung to it, feeling himself letting go of something when the other cupped the cheek Yerim had just slapped.

 

"I broke another heart," he mumbled, his own voice sounding so choked up and weak even to his own ears.

 

"No, she just broke yours a little more," was Kyungsoo reply as Baekhyun’s hand dropped and his warm hand cradled his probably reddened cheek.

 

Gentle fingers brushed over his other cheek, smearing something wet on his skin. Baekhyun felt himself twirling around, his throat burning both from the alcohol and the sadness he hated so much. It felt like a thorn in his heart, a vine crawling through his veins and wrapping around his heart and squeezing and sending shots of pain through his whole body and even through his soul. It never worked. Whatever Baekhyun did, he ended up hurting someone and the worst thing about it was that Kyungsoo was right, his own heart broke a little more with each single time it happened.  
  
His heart was so easy to break, it had been breaking for a while now and each slap to his face, each spiked insult was enough to dig another crack through it. Everyone ended up breaking his heart just as much as he broke theirs.

 

However, as he looked at the concern in Kyungsoo’s eyes, he felt the pain vanishing away a little bit. He blinked a few times, chasing the black dots invading his sight. He felt sleepy. Kyungsoo’s hand against his cheek was like a warm lullaby calling him to sleep. He felt an arm wrap around his waist, his legs suddenly seeming useless as Kyungsoo was his only support. He furrowed his eyebrows a bit and said something that Baekhyun couldn’t hear, his ears buzzing too loudly. His gaze dropped to the other’s lips.

 

He felt himself leaning closer. Yerim’s lips had been so cold but Kyungsoo’s whole being felt so warm. Baekhyun craved warmth. He craved it so much. He felt himself leaning closer, his gaze jumping up into Kyungsoo’s. The latter’s eyes were filled with surprise. Baekhyun felt his breath caressing his skin. It was warm.

 

"I’m tired of getting my heart broken, Kyungsoo," he heard himself say, the symphonies dancing in Kyungsoo’s eyes pulling the words out of him like they were the lyrics to a song only the two of them could hear in this crowded room. It was a song filled with sincerity, hesitation, maybe a little bit of fear, but mainly calm. "You would never break my heart, but I’d break yours. I always do."

 

His last word brushed something soft, his lips then gently pressing on Kyungsoo’s. It was warm, soft. It was gentle and soothing. It was so warm. Baekhyun hadn't known he had craved it so much until he felt his whole body going slack against the other’s.

 

It was a gentle kiss and in that single second it went on for, Baekhyun felt as if it had lasted forever.

 

Forever ended, however, and only darkness was left to take over.

 


	2. Love is Forever (Your Forever is All That I Need) (2/2)

When the darkness finally faded away, the first thing that Baekhyun could feel was warmth, too much warmth, the kind of warmth that was nice and stifling at the same time, the pleasant kind of warmth that pulled you out of your sleep at night but that didn’t make you want to curse out loud at the prospect of awakening earlier than you should.

 

However, that pleasant feeling dissipated in the blink of an eye when the next thing Baekhyun felt was something piercing through his temples, like a nail being hammered into his skull, something that felt like an awful headache born out of an evil hangover. He kept his eyes closed for almost a full minute, counting every single second in his head to focus on something other than the blinding pain he could feel pulsating through his whole head. Fortunately, it was silent in the room which helped lighten the pain a bit but still felt unusual, almost eery since he was used to waking up to Jongdae trying and failing to locate the hole in the door lock when he came back home at dawn, drunk out of his mind. Either that or he’d just blast loud music through the whole apartment early in the morning just because he didn’t like silence and if Jongdae was awake, he always thought that Baekhyun should be too.

 

There were no such sounds that morning, though, but if Baekhyun could get past the headache enough to actually focus on what he was hearing, he could pick up the slow rhythm of someone’s breathing, right next to him, not close enough for him to actually feel it on his skin but close enough for him to hear it. It was slow, each inhale and exhale long as if the person next to him was sleeping, something that was unusual too because Baekhyun rarely brought anyone back home with him. Had Jongdae crashed into his bed while trying to put him to sleep after the party last night? Or had he accidentally allowed someone else to take him home? The bed was comfortable though, as comfortable as his own was and Baekhyun usually had trouble sleeping in strangers’ bed but he could tell that nothing was wrong with him beside the hangover pounding into his temples.

 

The simple solution to his problem would be to open his eyes and look around but he was scared of his headache turning agonizing when he did if it already hurt that much even when his eyes were closed. Why had he drunk so much? He tried recalling what he had done at the party last night but his temples only throbbed harder as he did so, resulting in his giving up for now. He had no other choice, he should probably leave before whoever was sleeping next to him awoke - if he really was in a stranger’s house - so he opened his eyes, eyelids fluttering a bit and pain shooting through his skull as soon as he could catch blurry glimpse of the ceiling.

 

He bit his lower lip hard to prevent himself from groaning in pain, closing his eyes again for ten seconds that he counted in his head before opening them and blinking a few times, until the ceiling stopped wiggling around above him. How much had he even drunk? He had a decent alcohol tolerance and he was lucky enough for his hangovers to usually not last for more than a few hours but he usually always tried being careful.

 

Now wasn’t the time to try figuring out why he had fucked up so much, however, not when there was someone sleeping next to him. It took him a few more seconds but Baekhyun finally turned to his right, his eyes widening and the headache suddenly slipping into the back of his mind at the sight that greeted him.

 

The first thought that hit him was that Kyungsoo looked really cute when sleeping, then he wondered what Kyungsoo was doing in his bed before the realization that he wasn’t in his own bedroom finally struck him harshly and a small glint of panic seeped into him. It gradually grew brighter, coursing through Baekhyun’s veins as he spent a few seconds simply staring at Kyungsoo with wide, surprised eyes.

 

What was he doing in Kyungsoo’s bed? He had never actually seen Kyungsoo’s bedroom but he supposed this was it. There was no reason for the both of them to end up in a stranger’s bed. Why was Kyungsoo sleeping so soundly when Baekhyun could feel his skull splitting into two under the weight of his headache? How had they ended up like that? He lifted the blanket away from his body, looking down with panicked eyes that filled up with relief when he saw that he still had clothes on. However, he frowned the next second. These weren’t his clothes. He hadn’t been dressed like that when leaving his house last night. Had Kyungsoo changed his clothes? He felt his heart embarrassingly jumping in his ribcage like an overjoyed child at the thought but panic filled him up the next second. Why had Kyungsoo changed his clothes? Had he done something to embarrass himself? Why was he even here? Why couldn’t he recall anything from last night? 

 

Baekhyun forced himself to calm down, putting an end to the thoughts that traveled across his brain like a loaded truck whose breaks had been cut off. He took a deep breath in, closing his eyes for a few seconds, until his heartbeat slowed down a notch before looking at the other again.

 

Oddly, he felt something inside of him melt away, his teeth sinking into his lower lip almost hard enough to cut through the tender flesh. He let his gaze land on the black strands of hair that were scattered over Kyungsoo’s forehead, barely reaching its middle as they were ruffled from sleep but contrasting beautifully with his skin tone nonetheless. He then trailed his gaze down to the other’s bushy eyebrows, the small hair scattered at their extremities leading a path to the denser part that formed straight, thick brows. He felt his heart slowly regaining its usual rhythm back, soothed as he silently let his eyes travel down the bridge of Kyungsoo’s nose, watching as it scrunched up for a tine second before his features relaxed again. His cheeks were a bit rosy, as if he too felt a bit too hot while sleeping but wasn’t too bothered by it the way Baekhyun had been. He wondered what time it was, if probably wasn’t too late because he knew Kyungsoo was an early riser, he always replied to Baekhyun’s texts early in the morning or sent a good morning text on his own, one that put a smile on Baekhyun’s face as soon soon as he woke up a few hours after receiving it.

 

All thoughts about Kyungsoo’s lifestyle vanished away when his gaze trailed down a little bit more, however, tracing the pink curve of his upper lip. It had a perfect shape, like two little mountains, small twin hills that Baekhyun maybe wouldn’t mind letting his finger climb over. His lower lip was plump, it looked soft and like a comfortable cushion that seemed to be perfect enough to steal the exhaustion away from you as soon as you’d let yourself go against it at the end of a tiring day. His lips formed a small, barely noticeable sleepy pout and it was adorable. Baekhyun could feel gentle winds going through his head, the wind blowing his thoughts away as his eyes lingered on the other’s lips. They looked so soft, so appealing, Baekhyun’s heartbeat skyrocketed again and it was stupid and a bit scary but he couldn’t help it. He knew he couldn’t help it anymore, what he had thought would never happen to him finally did. But it didn’t matter because Kyungsoo looked so peaceful, so soothing, and his lips looked so soft and so warm. 

 

His lips were soft and warm. And as Baekhyun frowned, headache buzzing around his skull, he couldn’t help but wonder how he could even know that Kyungsoo’s lips were soft and warm. He had never kissed Kyungsoo. He had accidentally thought about it maybe more than he would admit it out loud but he had never kissed Kyungsoo. He hadn’t.

 

However, pain shot through his head, his eyes closing for a few seconds as suddenly, flashes from last night gleamed in his mind like a bright and loud siren. Flashes of a bottle of beer in his hand, a  red smile, glistening eyes, an overwhelming feeling of sadness that vanished away when he clung onto something soothing, someone soothing. Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo who had been wearing a leather jacket and who smelled nothing like alcohol and everything like comfort and safety. He felt his cheek throbbing with the memory of a slap, something wet sliding down his cheeks as something warm and gentle chased it away. Something soft and warm against his lips.

 

_‘You would never break my heart, but I’d break yours. I always do.’_

 

A short kiss that went on for a lifetime. A small taste of forever.

 

He had kissed Kyungsoo.

 

Baekhyun had kissed Kyungsoo after someone slapped him for whatever reason, with tears gliding down his cheeks and nothing but alcohol in his veins. He had kissed Kyungsoo. Panic suddenly crawled into the pit of his stomach, punching his heart up into a rampage against his ribcage as his grip on the blanket tightened, his eyes still wide as they rested on Kyungsoo’s lips. The soft, pink, heart shaped lips that he had kissed, without asking the other for his permission, without being allowed to, without even allowing himself to. He had kissed Kyungsoo. He heard someone gasp in surprise and the realization that the loud sound had been let out from his own mouth came along with the realization that he had _kissed Kyungsoo._

 

Kyungsoo seemed to have heard Baekhyun’s loud and stupid gasp as the next second, he watched the other frown in his sleep, stirring a bit before his eyes fluttered open. Baekhyun immediately snapped his eyes closed and cut his breath off, doing his best not to move an inch as his heart hammered against his chest. And he hated this, he hated suddenly feeling flustered and not knowing what to do because Baekhyun had woken up in a stranger’s bed more than once and never had he ever felt anything close to shyness or embarrassment but Kyungsoo kept making him feel stupid new things he had never experienced before. He didn’t even know why he was suddenly acting as if he was still asleep. He was so stupid.

 

"You know, playing dead doesn’t work when you’re blushing," a low, husky voice broke the silence after a while and it sounded much closer than it should. Baekhyun did his best not to let out any kind of embarrassing sound as he felt shivers running down his spine. Kyungsoo’s voice sounded so nice when he had just woken up. Kyungsoo always sounded so nice. He always felt so nice and it was a bit scary.

 

"I’m not blushing," he muttered after a few seconds, opening his eyes since he had been busted and acting as if he was asleep would only make him look even more stupid.

 

Kyungsoo was closer to him than he had been when Baekhyun was observing him, only a few inches separating their faces as he smiled at Baekhyun with that wide, amused smile that sparkled into his eyes. Baekhyun felt his heart begging to be let out and craving to be hidden away at the same time but he didn’t move a single inch, letting his gaze meet Kyungsoo’s amused one.

 

"Your cheeks are pink. That’s what we call a blush. You probably never experienced it before since you’re a shameless little shit," the other snorted and his husky, sleep-laced voice sounded so heavenly with a teasing undertone.

 

"I’m just hot. Why is your room so hot? That’s not the way to treat your most precious guest up to date," he mumbled, narrowing his eyes at the other. Why did Kyungsoo act as if waking up next to each other was a daily thing for them? Why was he the only one not knowing what to do?

 

"Who said you were my most precious guest up to date?" the other raised an eyebrow, his sleepy, hooded eyes filling up with amusement.

 

"Am I not? We slept in the same bed and I’m even wearing your clothes," he blurted out without even realizing it, freezing afterwards.

 

Kyungsoo simply chuckled softly, Baekhyun feeling that low, husky sound once again shaking his core, before he put some more distance between them and stretched his arms over his head, letting out a soft, tired sigh. He was like a sleepy cat. He was really adorable and this was so unhealthy for Baekhyun first thing in the morning.

 

"You refused to move from my bed and I had no choice but to change your clothes since you… dirtied them," he finally said, scrunching his nose up a little bit at the memory.

 

And Baekhyun cursed himself inwardly.

 

"I’m sorry, I hope I wasn’t too much of a bother. I usually never get so drunk and I don’t even remember much so I’m not sure why you’re the one who had to deal with me but thank you. I’m still sorry though, I kinda stole your clothes and your bed and probably also ruined your night so I’m–"

 

"It’s okay, calm down," Kyungsoo cut him off with a chuckle, turning to him again. "I didn’t mind, it’s not like I was having too much fun at that party anyway. You were just really drunk and we couldn’t find your friend so I took you home since I couldn’t just leave you alone there in that state."

 

"Still, I’m really sorry you had to see me… like that."

 

"Well, you can make it up to me by keeping me company for breakfast," Kyungsoo smiled at him before sitting up properly.

 

He was wearing a black shirt even to sleep and Baekhyun wasn’t sure whether he wanted to laugh or cry at this point when he found himself thinking that it was a bit cute. He settled on frowning in confusion.

 

"Free food is not really a punishment."

 

"It’s not, you’re right," the other shrugged, giving him a last light smile before getting off the bed. "The bathroom’s the door right across this room in the hallway. It should be ready in half an hour and I have painkillers in the kitchen too so be quick."

 

With that, Kyungsoo was gone out of the bedroom, leaving Baekhyun in a jumbled mess of confused thoughts.

 

It was still difficult to process all of this with a headache still hovering over him but the one thing he knew was that asking Baekhyun to keep him company for breakfast was far from being a punishment, it was a recompense even. Unless Kyungsoo planned to poison him with food but that was unlikely since he seemed to be in a rather good mood despite having told Baekhyun before that he was usually grumpy in the morning. He wasn’t sure how they had even managed to breach that subject but the conversations they had through texts always turned random anyway.

 

Why was Kyungsoo acting so normal? Baekhyun had _kissed_ him last night, something that could have turned their friendship upside-down since despite Kyungsoo usually answering to his slight flirty remarks and teasing him a lot in general, there was nothing that ever indicated that he was into Baekhyun. They had never acted in a way that suggested _feelings_ between them and Baekhyun knew that he did have those feelings but Kyungsoo probably didn’t. He had gotten out of a painful relationship not long ago, after all. Baekhyun really did feel comfortable with him and he also liked to think that Kyungsoo treated him differently than everyone else but that usually was just wishful thinking.

 

Maybe he had just forgotten about it. That could be possible, Baekhyun barely remembered anything besides that kiss and maybe Kyungsoo didn’t remember anything at all either. However, he seemed to remember was state Baekhyun had been last night and if he had been able to take care of Baekhyun and bring him home, then he must have not been in a bad state too. Maybe he just wanted to ignore the kiss. Baekhyun didn’t really remember his returning it. Maybe he had hated it and preferred to erase it completely from his memory, thinking that Baekhyun had forgotten it as well. It could make sense. It felt a bit weird to think about it, as if tiny needles were poking at his heart, but it could make sense.

 

He spent close to fifteen minutes in bed just sorting his thoughts out and readying himself to actually get out of this room and face both Kyungsoo and his hangover but eventually, Baekhyun managed to drag himself out of the comfortable bed. He headed towards the bathroom, following Kyungsoo’s instructions and washing up, trying to put his hair into order and crunching his nose a bit at the dark bags under his eyes. There was nothing much he could do, however, even if he somehow didn’t like the thought of Kyungsoo seeing him this way. He supposed nothing could be as bad as how he had probably been last night.

Once he was done, he headed towards the kitchen, stopping at the doorway to silently observe as Kyungsoo moved around the kitchen, busy with preparing breakfast.

 

"You’re making pancakes?" he finally asked, stepping into the room and walking closer to Kyungsoo to peek over his shoulder.

 

"I hope you’ll like it," the other hummed. "There are painkillers and a glass of water to go with it on the counter."

 

"I think I’m hungry enough to eat anything you’d feed me," he chuckled softly, his chest warming up a bit at how natural this all seemed. As if they woke up together and shared breakfast every morning. The thought was nice.

 

He once again did as told, grabbing the glass to gulp down the small pill that he hoped would efficiently chase his headache away.

 

"You really should eat whatever I’d feed you, I’m generous enough not to kick you out of my house after last night," Kyungsoo said sternly but Baekhyun caught on the teasing edge of his voice.

 

"You would’ve kicked me out of bed last night if you hated it so much," he chuckled softly.

 

"I’m just kindhearted."

 

"You just like me," he retorted with a snort, realizing what he had said only after the words left his mouth.

 

Kyungsoo stayed silent as he started cooking up the pancakes, the smile now gone from his face and lips pressed into a straight line in what seemed to be concentration. Baekhyun’s heartbeat was still too fast. It felt so odd.

 

"Can I help?" he asked after a few seconds of uselessly and awkwardly hovering around the other.

 

"You can set the table," Kyungsoo said and like an eager puppy, Baekhyun immediately got to work.

 

As it turned out to be, around fifteen minutes later, Kyungsoo had really not tried to poison him with food since the pancakes tasted rather heavenly in his mouth and he just couldn’t stop eating even if his stomach hurt a bit and he probably shouldn’t eat that much. The painkillers had taken effect at least, and his headache had slowly dissipated but what kept him going was probably Kyungsoo’s pleased smile each time he voiced out how delicious the food was. 

 

They talked about random things, nothing and everything at once and even if silence sometimes settled over them for a few minutes, this silence was the only one that Baekhyun never itched to break off. It was just comfortable to be around Kyungsoo, he was just soothing and now Baekhyun could figure out that it was probably because of those feelings he nurtured towards the other but it didn’t change the fact that he liked it so much. He didn’t even know when that had happened. When had those feelings even developed? He wasn’t sure. Was it when Kyungsoo had been so surprised that Baekhyun wanted to partner up with him that he had looked nothing less than adorable with his wide confused eyes and his stupid questions? Or maybe it was when he had told Baekhyun that he was different than how he thought he’d be, when they were eating their favorite sandwich in a crowded cafeteria but Baekhyun hadn’t felt the need to look at anywhere else but Kyungsoo’s face. It could have also started when Kyungsoo had understood Baekhyun so quickly, when he had told him that he knew Baekhyun only wanted to make people smile. Or when he had played guitar for Baekhyun and sang a song that Baekhyun felt in his heart, or when he had smiled for the first time with that heart-shaped smile that Baekhyun found himself thinking about more often than not, or when Kyungsoo had explained him why love was forever. He didn’t know but it was stupid and weird and a bit scary but the suffocating fear Baekhyun had felt last night had dissipated a little bit.

 

Kyungsoo was so different from what Baekhyun thought he would turn out to be, he was playful and teasing even if only someone familiar with him would be able to pick up the small lilts of his voice. He was maybe a bit too sarcastic sometimes but it wasn’t in a mean way, and he just had a beautiful smile that Baekhyun liked seeing. Oddly, that smile seemed to greet him more often as the days passed.

 

However, in the middle of yet another comfortable silence, when Baekhyun finally could not fit any more pancakes into his stomach and Kyungsoo had been done eating for a few minutes now, there was still something that bothered him.

 

"I don’t really remember much about last night," he started, hesitantly glancing at Kyungsoo who gave him his whole attention in return, leaning back into his chair. "I think someone… slapped me?"

 

"You don’t remember that? It was quite a sight to see," Kyungsoo chuckled quietly. "I think it left a mark on your cheek for the rest of the night. You seem to bruise rather easily."

 

"I guess I do," Baekhyun chuckled softly before sighing. "Who slapped me and why?"

 

"I think it was a girl called Yerim or something like that. The one that was at the coffee shop the other day," Kyungsoo shrugged, his eyebrows furrowing a bit. "From what I got, she likes you and you kissed her for whatever stupid reason so she thought you liked her back. You told her you didn’t when she tried taking you away from me and she got really angry, kinda freaked out and slapped you while calling you an asshole."

 

Somehow, it wasn’t surprising. It shouldn’t be surprising, Baekhyun had expected to hear those words and that same exact scene had happened to him so many times he probably shouldn’t even have questioned it. He hadn’t expected it to be Yerim though, and he hadn’t expected to hear that he had kissed her either. Either way, he wasn’t surprised by the way his heart seemed to be squeezed by his ribcage suddenly. What was surprising was the accusing tone Kyungsoo had thrown into his words when addressing them to Baekhyun.

 

"I guess I deserved it then," he mumbled, looking down at his empty plate and avoiding Kyungsoo’s gaze. The latter probably thought he did.

 

He didn’t like the fact that Kyungsoo had had to witness such a scene, not when Baekhyun had never wanted him to believe the reputation he had. He probably had looked like an asshole to his eyes as well, kissing an innocent girl without any reason and then telling her that he didn't return her feelings. It had been his fault. He shouldn’t have kissed her.

 

"You can just make sure that it doesn’t happen again. You’re a grown up, you can learn from your own mistakes, can’t you?" Kyungsoo questioned, gaze hard as steel on Baekhyun’s face. He felt shame wrapping all around his throat at once, hating himself in the few seconds it took Kyungsoo to soften his gaze a bit. "Even if you still eat like a five-year-old."

 

That was enough for Baekhyun to smile a bit and he looked up at the other, glad that Kyungsoo wasn’t judging him or changing his views about him after witnessing such a thing. It was so odd, Baekhyun had never really cared that much about what people thought of him but Kyungsoo’s opinion mattered so much, way too much. He supposed it was normal.

 

"You’re the one feeding me pancakes."

 

"Pancakes can be eaten by adults too," the other raised an eyebrow.

 

"Well, since you bothered bringing me home, changing my clothes, and tucking me into bed right next to you, I suppose you don’t hate me acting childish that much," he retorted, raising an eyebrow to playfully mirror the other’s expression. They stared at each other defiantly for a few seconds during which Baekhyun’s heartbeat was loud enough to fill up the silence.

 

"Don’t be an ungrateful brat or I’ll make you do the dishes," Kyungsoo threatened him, eyes narrowing a little bit.

 

And in the next second, both of them burst into laughter, once again without any actual reason. That didn’t really matter, however, and Baekhyun was happy. Happy that Kyungsoo had taken care of him last night when he could’ve just left him at the party, happy that Kyungsoo had asked him to stay for breakfast, and happy that he wouldn’t change his behavior with Baekhyun despite what had happened last night.

 

That single thought was enough for Baekhyun to remember that there was one last thing they had to talk about.

 

"Last night," he started hesitantly when they had both calmed down a bit. "When I- I’m sorry for… I mean, for what I did to you."

 

Kyungsoo frowned at him as if he had no idea what Baekhyun was talking about and it was so stupid because Baekhyun should word it correctly, he never had trouble talking about that kind of things but somehow, when it came to Kyungsoo, Baekhyun could hardly ever recognize himself.

 

"You mean when you kissed me?" Kyungsoo asked without beating around the bush, filling Baekhyun both with relief and dread. He couldn’t recognize the emotions in his voice and he couldn’t look at the other either.

 

"That," he nodded, unsure what to say or do. "I’m sorry for that, I just… I didn’t mean to–"

 

"It’s okay," Kyungsoo cut him off, shaking his head a bit and giving him a tight lipped smile. "I figured you were the kind of person to go around and kiss random people when you’re drunk. No big deal."

 

As soon as those words left Kyungsoo’s mouth, he heard something break and felt something crack a little in his chest. Panic filled him up at once, seeping though the new cracks in his heart. Kyungsoo was wrong. He had gotten it all completely wrong. This wasn’t it at all. Baekhyun didn’t go and kiss random strangers just because he was drunk. That had happened with Yerim because he remembered her crying but when he had kissed Kyungsoo, it had been because he had craved it. He could remember the gentle warmth coursing through his veins, he could still feel it lingering in his chest, wrapped all around his body like a devilish song stuck in his soul, notes harsh and loud enough to push him against Kyungsoo and complete their song with an everlasting lip lock. 

 

Kyungsoo wasn’t just a random person to him, not anymore.

 

However, Kyungsoo was right to think this way. How else could he have even considered their kiss with Baekhyun’s reputation and the knowledge that he had kissed Yerim right before? He had brought this upon himself, it wouldn’t have happened if he had been more careful. Or maybe Kyungsoo simply wanted their kiss to remain as something Baekhyun would have given to just anyone in his drunken daze.

 

He felt a big, painful lump lodge itself in his throat. Maybe he should have acted as if he had forgotten it, the way Kyungsoo had done until Baekhyun had brought it up himself. 

 

"Alright then," he said softly, forcing himself to return the other’s smile. "No big deal. I’m glad."

 

Kyungsoo observed him for a few seconds but Baekhyun immediately looked away, forcing himself to put on a blank expression. He didn’t want the other to know. He didn’t want Kyungsoo to know that he had felt that small glimpse of Forever in that short kiss that seemed so insignificant to the other.

 

"If you’re done eating we could work on our song a bit since you’re here anyway," Kyungsoo offered softly.

 

Baekhyun didn’t want to. He wanted to go home and for the first time ever, he wanted to listen to one of those stupidly sad ballads and bury himself under his blanket for the rest of the day.

 

However, Baekhyun was weak and when he spent a few hours laughing with Kyungsoo, teasing the other and getting teased back in return, humming gentle melodies with him before leaving while still wearing the other’s clothes, he supposed that this was what all those love songs were about.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The whole ordeal was forgotten in the span of a few days, or at least that was what Baekhyun liked to tell himself even if the fleeting memory of gentle lips pressing against his always sneaked into his dreams at night, only for the sudden realization that his bed was somehow too cold hit him as soon as he woke up in the morning, no source of warmth next to him. 

 

Maybe he was being a bit dramatic, he had only spent a single night in Kyungsoo’s bed and they hadn’t been clinging to each other when he had woken up, not as far as he remembered at least since he couldn’t be sure whether he had been all over Kyungsoo in his sleep or not. It had still felt nice to wake up next to the other, however, it had felt really nice and warm, something that Baekhyun hadn’t felt in a long time. His one night stands were sparse, he didn’t like waking up in a  stranger’s bed too often but whenever he did, he was always swarmed with the panic of getting out of there as soon as he woke. That hadn’t been the case when he had woken up in Kyungsoo’s bed.

 

It had felt nice and somehow, now that he looked back on it, Baekhyun kind of wished he had spent longer there. It was really weird but after spending one night in Kyungsoo’s bed, simply sleeping with a few inches separating them, Baekhyun’s own bed didn’t seem as appealing anymore and he certainly did not sleep as well as he had slept that night. Neither of them ever mentioned anything about it in the following days, however, and when he had left Kyungsoo’s house that day, more than a week ago now, he had expected things between them to take a drastic change.

 

They had _kissed,_ after all and Baekhyun knew that he had changed after that short moment, he knew that it had been more than a mere kiss to him, it had been his first taste of Forever. It hadn’t been the case for Kyungsoo, however, and seeing as Kyungsoo was way more uptight than he was about his relationships with people, Baekhyun had almost expected the other to suddenly change his attitude towards him after that day. He knew about Baekhyun’s reputation, after all, he had even told him that he was aware that Baekhyun had kissed him only because he had been drunk and it had been far from being the case but Baekhyun hadn’t even bothered correcting him because if Kyungsoo had wanted it to be something more, he would’ve said so. He hadn’t, however, and Baekhyun had expected him to start putting more distance between them, he had even refrained from texting the other for almost three whole days even if he had spent those few days opening up their conversation box and letting his fingers hover over the keyboard only to lock the device up again and put it somewhere he wouldn’t have to see it. He just hadn’t found the courage to send a message to the other from fear of never receiving a reply or just being offered a few words that had everything to do with their project and nothing else.

 

And it had been weird because Baekhyun had never felt this way, he had never expected a text so much, he had never spent whole days wondering whether someone was okay, whether they had eaten, whether they were taking breaks between studying, and whether they were thinking about him too or not. It was completely familiar and unexpected but what had been more unexpected was for Kyungsoo to be the first one to send him a message after three whole days of silence from Baekhyun. It had been nothing much, just a picture of a dog he seemed to have snapped in the streets while walking around, but somehow, it had been enough for relief to fill Baekhyun’s chest up and _almost_ drip into his eyes. That single picture had been enough for Baekhyun to know he had been the first person to pop into Kyungsoo’s mind when he had stumbled upon that cute puppy since Baekhyun distinctly remembered sending pictures of his own puppy to Kyungsoo while gushing over how much he loved animals and especially dogs.

 

Maybe he was being too dramatic, maybe he was getting too ahead of himself, it had been nothing but a picture but Baekhyun had still eagerly replied to him, the next minute, not even letting himself wait a bit in order not to make it seem like he had been hanging off his phone, waiting for Kyungsoo’s text. That had been the case anyway and Baekhyun had always been shameless, he supposed. That cute picture had led to a conversation through text messages that had lasted the whole day, up until Kyungsoo had told him to go to sleep when it had already been past midnight. They had talked about everything and nothing, and Kyungsoo had not missed the occasion to tell Baekhyun he thought he had died after three days of silence but Baekhyun had waved it off, simply telling him he had been busy with classes and watching anime. 

 

Everything had fallen into place properly after that, they continued texting each other as often as they used to before the party. Or maybe things had taken a better turn after that since they texted each other more often after those three days of silence and they had even started bumping into each other more often at school as well. If you were to ask him, Baekhyun would keep denying the fact that he hung around the building Kyungsoo had class in whenever he was free. They had also started going to that coffee shop they had coincidentally met in together as well, often after class. Kyungsoo had made it into a habit to tell Baekhyun he was at the coffee shop after Baekhyun had told him that he somehow was more productive whenever he had tea and Kyungsoo with him. Kyungsoo had raised an eyebrow and Baekhyun had simply shrugged, telling him that it must be because he was boring and therefore pushed Baekhyun to find entertainment in his homework.

 

He couldn’t say that spending more time with Kyungsoo was the best thing to do in his case as with each minute he spent in the other’s company, his desire to never ever part from him was growing even more to the point that Baekhyun was starting to get tired of this stupid crush he couldn’t seem to get rid of. He couldn’t just suddenly cut contact with Kyungsoo, however, especially not since they were in the middle of finalizing their song. Maybe that was just an excuse though, maybe Baekhyun just knew spending his days without Kyungsoo would feel too weird now.

 

Moreover, his own stupidity wasn’t the only reason why this was getting too difficult with each passing day. On the contrary, Kyungsoo’s own behavior was the sole reason why this was all getting harder. The other had clearly stated that Baekhyun had kissed him because that was just what he thought he did whenever he was drunk and Baekhyun would’ve expected him to be upset about it but he had never been. He had made breakfast for Baekhyun on the morning following the party, he had been the first one to message Baekhyun when the latter had been silent, and he had never ever made Baekhyun feel as if he was just too much. He only seemed to grow more comfortable around Baekhyun, smiling at him more often, laughing at his jokes harder than before and even joining in the banter. He always informed Baekhyun whenever he was at the coffee shop and he never explicitly asked Baekhyun to join him but whenever Baekhyun replied to him that he was on his way, his usual drink was always already waiting for him when he settled across from Kyungsoo at their usual table.

 

That could’ve seemed normal, Kyungsoo wasn’t too uptight, he wasn’t haughty, and he had never been an asshole either so maybe he really did just found a nice friend in Baekhyun and at this point, the latter could be happy with that mere fact as well but sometimes, Kyungsoo didn’t even treat him like a friend. He might be treating him like something more and Baekhyun knew he could very much be delusional at this point but he wasn’t stupid, he knew Kyungsoo enough now and he could decipher almost every single emotion behind his words, most of his intentions, and what struck him often was the fact that Kyungsoo seemed to be flirting with him. Maybe Baekhyun was always the one initiating it first out of habit - unfortunately - or maybe also out of despair, but Kyungsoo never shut him down, always retorting with that playful tone, always offering Baekhyun that lopsided, dashing smile, and sometimes even initiating physical contact with him, brushing the corner of his lip with a thumb whenever Baekhyun was eating a muffin at the coffee shop because he was a messy eater, sometimes letting his hand rest on Baekhyun’s lower back to steady him whenever they were taking the subway together and it was too crowded, and always, always observing Baekhyun like he had done since the very first day.

 

In short, Baekhyun was starting to go crazy and kept telling himself that he needed to stop being delusional if he didn’t want to experience a pain a thousand times greater than what he had felt when Kyungsoo had shut him off when he had breached the topic of their kiss that morning, almost ten days ago.

 

However, Baekhyun might be a little stupid because as soon as Kyungsoo had messaged him that their song was completely done and only needed the lyrics to be fully complete that afternoon, he had immediately jumped on the occasion to call for celebration. They had been working on the last finishing touches last night but Baekhyun had to go home before they could finish the song together since Jongdae had lost his keys and had ended up locked outside their apartment, waiting for Baekhyun to save him. Kyungsoo had simply smiled and told him to go, that he could finish it up on his own tomorrow since he was also tired anyway. Baekhyun had never cursed Jongdae so much before.

 

It was all settled now though and Kyungsoo had also replied positively to Baekhyun’s suggestion even if the latter had to insist a little bit. They could’ve very much just celebrated it on their own, in Kyungsoo’s apartment while eating pizza and watching movies but it was getting exhausting for Baekhyun to try keeping his heartbeat in a normal pace whenever Kyungsoo was getting too close to him even with the most innocent of intentions. It was growing stifling to be in the same closed space as the other, alone, and he was scared of Kyungsoo catching him staring at him like an idiot in the middle of a movie so this had seemed like the safest way to spend time with Kyungsoo for now. He had already been planning to go out tonight anyway so Kyungsoo could just join him and make it easier for Baekhyun. Not only would they be in a crowded bar together without any possible danger for Baekhyun’s heart but he also just wanted to spend time with Kyungsoo outside of their usual hanging out places that merely consisted of the school grounds, the coffee shop, and Kyungsoo’s apartment.

 

And that brought him to waiting for Kyungsoo right outside of the bar that night, his fingers typing a message to the other to make sure he didn’t get lost on the way since it had already been five minutes since Baekhyun arrived and Kyungsoo was usually always the one already waiting for him in their meeting places. He might be a bit too impatient but he was really excited to show this place to Kyungsoo who surprised him by telling him he didn’t know yet another amazing place in this amazing city. This bar was one that Baekhyun frequented often, both when he needed a drink and craved to listen to young, underground artists performing the music they genuinely liked creating. This place was always full of hidden gems, sometimes it was a band Baekhyun could listen to for hours, sometimes it was a wonderful performance of piano, twice a month the owner even allowed a DJ to take over the place and turn the quiet bar into a bustling night club, and sometimes it was just soothing, happy melodies that Baekhyun could listen to the whole night.

 

There was always a few ballads in there as well but lately, that didn’t bother Baekhyun as much as it used to. He knew for sure that it was at least the kind of ballad Kyungsoo would love and he sincerely hoped that he wouldn’t be wrong about it. He had never been wrong about Kyungsoo until today though, so he was hopeful.

 

He pressed the send button on his phone, watching as the message containing a question about Kyungsoo’s location and at least five question marks was delivered to him and remaining still, gaze impatiently locked on their message thread as he waited for a reply. 

 

"You’re so impatient," he suddenly heard, however, recognizing the baritone voice he loved so much without even having to look up. He still did, however, gaze meeting Kyungsoo’s slightly amused one. "Do you ever see me spamming you with messages each time you’re late to our meetings?"

 

"I sent you like two messages," he grumbled as a reply, a beat too late as his gaze took in Kyungsoo’s appearance.

 

There wasn’t anything too different about it, he was still dressed in black save for the white shirt he was sporting under his black jacket, his jeans dark and hugging his thighs the same way they did a few nights ago, when Kyungsoo had given Baekhyun a glimpse of forever before taking it away from him just as quickly. How he managed to always look good despite always wearing similar clothes was still a mystery to Baekhyun who felt his heart thudding in his chest a bit quicker than it had only a minute ago. He also found himself unable to breath properly for a few seconds when he took in the way Kyungsoo’s hair was slicked back, giving him a more mature and put-together image than usual even if he looked at Baekhyun with the same gentle eyes and the same lopsided smile that just gave Kyungsoo this little air of _something_ that always seemed to press play on Baekhyun’s heart, making it play as loud as the bass in all those nightclubs he had frequented his whole life.

 

"Two messages in the span of five minutes," Kyungsoo quirked an eyebrow, voice playfully singing right into Baekhyun’s ears even if there were a few steps separating them. It didn’t change the fact that his voice was the only melody he could hear amidst the music emanating from the bar behind him, the low swoosh of the passing cars, and the conversational laughter of the passer-by’s.

 

"You look great," he suddenly blurted out, words escaping him so suddenly that Kyungsoo looked surprised for a second before laughing with that low, raspy, and chocolatey voice that always sent tingles down Baekhyun’s spine.

 

"Thanks, you look really nice too," he replied, his eyes looking into Baekhyun’s with that glint Baekhyun had still not managed to figure out. "Almost as if you dressed to impress someone."

 

"Yeah, I pleased and impressed myself a lot when I looked into the mirror before leaving home," Baekhyun shrugged, an amused smile curled on his lips as he recognized that tone, _the_ tone that either told him that Kyungsoo was flirting with him or that he was being completely delusional. He still didn’t know.

 

Either way, he felt his heart beating even harder at those words as he couldn’t help but panic a little at the prospect of Kyungsoo figuring out that he had put extra care to his appearance tonight. It wasn’t much. He had just put on his favorite shirt and his favorite jeans, the ones that he knew just hugged his behind perfectly and gave a wonderful sight to whoever glanced at him. He might have also spent almost a full hour in the bathroom trying to tame his silver hair into _something_ that would look casual but amazing and maybe he had also carefully lined his eyes with a little bit of kohl but he had just felt like it. Jongdae had snickered at him when he had seen him finally getting out of the bathroom, his laughter only growing harder after he had asked Baekhyun whether he was _trying to impress his anti-bright-song crush_ and he had spluttered as if caught red-handed. Maybe snapping and telling Jongdae everything about Kyungsoo in the third day they had gone without communicating had been his biggest mistake, following right after allowing Jongdae to call him his best friend years ago.

 

"I don’t wanna know what you do when you’re alone with your mirror, Baekhyun," the other replied but there was no sign of disgust or honesty at all in his voice or features and Baekhyun was honestly starting to lose his sanity.

 

"You sure?" he quirked an eyebrow, leisurely drawing his word out as he stepped closer to the other.

 

Kyungsoo simply chuckled lowly again before shaking his head at him in amusement and stepping closer, gaze never once wandering away from Baekhyun’s until he gently grabbed the latter’s arm, turning him around and gently pushing him forward so they could walk together.

 

"Let’s go in," he simply said and Baekhyun smiled at him, excitement bubbling in his stomach as they walked into the bar.

 

It was a bit warmer inside but that was to be expected as they were well into spring. It wasn’t too much of a bother, however, and truthfully, Baekhyun couldn’t really pay attention to that kind of detail as he simply observed Kyungsoo who took in his unfamiliar surroundings, doe eyes trailing around in the familiar way they always did as soon as Kyungsoo stepped into both a new or familiar place. 

 

It wasn’t too crowded, it was a rather small place with just enough patrons to fill all the seats without it seeming anything remotely close to suffocating. The lights were dim, comfortable booths made out of blue velvet were lining the walls and the center of the room was filled with small tables for those who wanted to be closer to the stage, a small elevated spot that was just large enough to fit in a whole band who might have to squeeze together closer than usual without it being too uncomfortable either. The stage wasn’t filled with instruments today, however, there was only a microphone stand along with a high stool Baekhyun had seen dozens of times there. None of those were occupied for now, however, and the only music draped over the room like a comfortable, gentle blanket was emanating from the speakers hidden somewhere between the classy yet warm decorations splattered all around the room. It wasn’t a huge place, it wasn’t too popular either and that was why Baekhyun liked it, he could come here whenever he needed to be alone without isolating himself too much.

 

Without a word, they headed towards the bar, settling on the empty stools they found before Baekhyun turned to the bartender who immediately walked to them. It was a nice, pretty women who had listened to him ramble about anything and everything whenever alcohol erased his brain to mouth filter more than usual and he gave her a smile before ordering a beer. He wasn’t in the mood for anything fancy tonight and Kyungsoo didn’t seem to be either since he asked the bartender to make it two beers instead.

 

"So, how do you find the place?" he asked as soon as the woman got to work and left them alone for a bit, his excited smile offered to Kyungsoo without any ounce of hesitation. He could feel himself almost wanting to jump up and down on his stool and he didn’t know whether it was because he hadn’t dropped by there for a few weeks, if he just needed to know what Kyungsoo thought about one of his favorite places in the world, or if it was just because of _Kyungsoo._

 

"I’ve only been here for two minutes, Baekhyun," the other chuckled softly, looking at him in a  way that made it obvious to Baekhyun that the other was aware about his hardly-contained excitement.

 

"Come on," he rolled his eyes, huffing a little. "Don’t act as if two minutes aren’t enough for you to make yourself an idea about this place."

 

"Fine, I’ll make an effort so you can stop acting like an excited puppy," the other snorted without any bite, merely widening Baekhyun’s smile with those words. He looked around for a few silent seconds, waiting for their drinks to be slid in front of them before speaking again. "It’s nice."

 

"That’s it?" Baekhyun urged him, frowning a little. Kyungsoo merely shrugged before taking a sip of his beer.

 

All of a sudden, Baekhyun felt the excitement that had been coursing through him simmering down, growing quieter before finally dying down like the last note of a song. If that was all Kyungsoo was willing to say about this place then it could only mean that he didn’t like it and that he refrained from outright saying so only because he didn’t want to be rude to Baekhyun. If he had genuinely liked this bar, then he would’ve commented on it more. It shouldn’t really come as a surprise, they had different tastes, after all, despite their similarities. Maybe bringing him here had been a mistake. He looked away from Kyungsoo, letting his gaze fall on his bottle of beer instead as he turned to properly face the counter instead of Kyungsoo. What if he totally hated this place and asked to leave in half an hour? What if he told Baekhyun to stay here if he likes it and that he could just go home on his own? What if he had just ruined their night by bringing him here and Kyungsoo was going to be upset at him? What if-

 

"Stop looking like a kicked puppy," he suddenly heard, his dangerous trail of thoughts suddenly cut off when he felt a warm hand settling on thigh before pulling firmly until he turned to face Kyungsoo again, surprise preventing him from keeping control over his own body.

 

"I don’t," he mumbled, frowning when he caught Kyungsoo’s amused smile. It was hard to focus on anything else but the warm hand still resting on his thigh, however, and when Kyungsoo slid it towards his knee a bit before removing it completely, Baekhyun wasn’t sure whether he was relieved or saddened by it.

 

"Yes, you do," the other snorted and Baekhyun was really about to get upset but before he could say anything, Kyungsoo’s smile suddenly grew wide and heart shaped and amused and handsome and Baekhyun was starting to hate the effect it had on him. "I just wanted to see if I could turn an excited puppy into a sad one. I was just kidding, I actually like this place," he continued, his smile turning a bit gentler as he glanced around again. "It’s cozy and not too crowded, it feels a bit warm too."

 

It was ridiculous how easy it was for Kyungsoo to drain him out in a second only to inject happiness right into his heart the next moment. He had heard something similar to that in a song before and he had scrunched his nose at those cheesy lyrics instantly. He wondered if this was karma slapping him with all its strength now.

 

"I didn’t take you for the manipulating kind of person," he snorted, narrowing his eyes in mock anger as he looked at the other even if his voice was once again filled with joy and mirth.

 

"And I didn’t take you for the kind to hang out in this kind of places," Kyungsoo played along, narrowing his eyes right back at Baekhyun to mimic him. "I thought you only hung out in nightclubs to get drunk and dance on bright, messy music." The way he scrunched his nose up the slightest bit towards the end of his sentence was a bit adorable and it took the sting of those words away the slightest bit.

 

"What can I say, I’m a man full of surprises," he simply shrugged, sipping on his drink afterwards.

 

"You are," he heard the other say before he followed Baekhyun by taking a sip of his beer as well.

 

"But I’m really glad you like this place," Baekhyun commented after a few silent seconds. "It’s one of my favorite places to hang out in."

 

"It does look like a great place to go to when you want to be alone but not cooped up at your house at the same time," Kyungsoo hummed. The corner of Baekhyun’s lips quirked up the slightest bit. They had a similar way of thinking. "But I’ll decide whether I fully like it or not after watching the performance. You said the performer’s your friend, right?"

 

"He is!" Baekhyun perked up, glancing at his watch to check the time. "I think he’s gonna go up in a few minutes, we arrived just in time."

 

"I’ll continue trusting your taste for the music too then," Kyungsoo said seriously but Baekhyun caught on the playful glint in his eyes and deciphered the hidden meaning of those words.

 

"He’s not going to sing girl group songs," he defended himself with a light chuckle. "He’s actually really great and I think he’ll perform with his guitar tonight so we might get a depressing song or two. Lucky you," he ended playfully.

 

Kyungsoo laughed softly, parting his lips to reply but before he could say anything, Baekhyun heard the soft thud of a glass being put on the counter and he turned is head to look at the same bartender from earlier, gaze falling to the glass containing a very expensive golden beverage.

 

"I didn’t order this," he said, confused eyes looking back up at the woman behind the counter.

 

"It’s on the man sitting over there, he ordered it for you," she informed him, nodding towards a spot over his shoulder. 

 

He followed her gaze until his eyes indeed met those of a man sitting alone on a booth at the other side of the room, his fingers curled around a glass containing the same golden brew he had just been offered. He lifted his glass a bit as if he was silently raising a toast, lips curling into a handsome smile as he stared back at Baekhyun who had no idea who he was. He had never encountered him here, nor anywhere else as far as he remembered and he would’ve remembered him because the man didn’t look too bad despite obviously having a few years on him, that fact made obvious by the way he was dressed in an expensive suit.

 

The whole ordeal was weird but not unfamiliar to Baekhyun even if being offered a drink by a stranger hadn’t happened to him in this particular bar yet. He wasn’t the kind to refuse free drinks, however, and the guy hadn’t actually made a move on him, he didn’t even look like he had that intention for now. He smiled back at the man, feeling surprisingly awkward about it since he could feel Kyungsoo’s gaze on him. He immediately turned back to the latter, oddly feeling the urge to explain himself but before he could even say anything, Kyungsoo reached for the glass, wrapping his fingers around it and suddenly bringing it up to his lips only to throw his head back as he dawned the whole drink in a single shot.

 

"What are you doing?" Baekhyun asked, surprise seeping into his voice since he hadn’t expected the other to do that and especially not to drink it all in one shot.

 

Kyungsoo didn’t reply to him, however. Instead, he turned his head to look at the man Baekhyun had been looking at only seconds ago and slightly lifted the now empty glass towards him the same way the man had done when looking at Baekhyun. Kyungsoo didn’t have a charming smile on his lips as he did so, however, and Baekhyun heard confused notes twirl around his head as he took in the way Kyungsoo’s gaze was darker than earlier, no other trace of emotion on his face besides his quirked eyebrow as he looked at the man and the tense line of his jaw.

 

His gaze found Baekhyun again and for some reason, he felt something unfold in him, maybe something melting. He wasn’t sure what it was but it was somewhere around his chest.

 

"I was thirsty," Kyungsoo simply said, putting the empty glass back down on the counter.

 

Baekhyun frowned a bit in confusion. If he had been thirsty, he could’ve drunk from his own bottle of beer. Hell, he could’ve even ordered a glass of water, it wouldn’t have costed much and it certainly would’ve quenched his thirst better than alcohol. A few silent seconds passed like that before Kyungsoo turned his gaze away, looking over at the man with what seemed to be a slightly pissed off glint in his eyes. Baekhyun glanced at said man as well, noting that he had stopped looking over at them and was busying himself on his phone instead, a frown now replacing the charming smile that had been on his face as he was looking at Baekhyun.

 

His gaze found Kyungsoo again but the other still wasn’t looking away from the man, as if he wanted to make sure that he wouldn’t disturb them again. It was odd. He had never seen Kyungsoo act like that. He was acting almost territorial, maybe a bit pissed off and he had _that_ look on his face. Baekhyun had seen that look on Jongdae’s face before, whenever he caught a glimpse of Sooyoung talking to another man. Baekhyun always teased him about it because Jongdae was always extra whiny whenever he was jealous and he always took great pleasure from seeing that.

 

He frowned. But that was Jongdae. Kyungsoo wasn’t Jongdae and he wasn’t Sooyoung being hit on by another man.

 

There was no reason for Kyungsoo to act like that. But Baekhyun wasn’t _that_ clueless either. He could recognize jealousy and possessiveness when he saw it. Most of the time at least, he thought when remembering how many times Jongdae had told him some _friends_ were getting possessive over him and Baekhyun never believed him until he witnessed it with his own eyes when it was already way to late for him to get himself out of the situation without any trouble.

 

This wasn’t the case now, though. Kyungsoo wasn’t a friend Baekhyun was accidentally on the way of breaking the heart of. Kyungsoo had never actually shown any sign of interest towards him. He had never even shown anything justifying his reaction now. Maybe he was just the protective kind of friend. They were friends now, they had established that a long time ago and Kyungsoo did seem like the kind of friend who’d always look out for you. He supposed, at least, since he had never actually seen Kyungsoo interacting with his friends. However, this didn’t really look like the friendly kind of possessiveness. It looked like something more and Baekhyun inwardly cursed himself when his heart suddenly agreed with him by dancing crazily to its own fast-paced rhythm. 

 

He was probably only being delusional, once again. There was no reason for Kyungsoo to be jealous. There was no reason at all and Baekhyun needed to stop imagining all sorts of things when Kyungsoo had already made it clear that he didn’t see Baekhyun as anything more than a friend and a project partner. He needed to stop letting himself imagine all kinds of things until the ache in his heart screamed into his soul and called him back out of his fantasies and into the harsh reality instead. Baekhyun was just delusional. He needed to stop hurting himself.

 

He was delusional but he was also a bit stupid and when his lips curled into a teasing smile and he leaned a bit closer to Kyungsoo, ignoring the pain clutching at his chest, he couldn’t help but notice that with each passing day, he was also starting to get too close to the correct definition of masochist. 

 

"Thirsty? It looks more like someone is jealous to me," he singsonged, playful eyes finally meeting with Kyungsoo’s again when the latter snapped his attention back at him. He hoped that the teasing lilts in his voice were enough to hide the worry and curiosity he could feel deep inside of him no matter how much he tried telling himself that this was just another way of simply making fun of Kyungsoo. It was slowly starting to become his favorite thing to do, after all.

 

However, Kyungsoo didn’t seem to share the same emotions as him and even if it should’ve been expected, Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed when Kyungsoo merely quirked an eyebrow, the playful glints in his eyes far from the panic someone who had just been caught redhanded should show. It really had just been delusion, after all. His heart curled in on itself, hiding in a corner of his ribcage, needles painfully poking it. Was it because of the beer?

 

"Wouldn’t you like that," the other mumbled softly, teasing Baekhyun right back, so easily, _too_ easily.

 

Baekhyun took a big gulp of beer, the liquid only adding more to the bitter taste already lingering in his mouth but allowing him to simply tell himself it was the alcohol and not his own feelings. It also helped cope with the disappointment a little bit and Baekhyun managed to get a grip of himself back right away, not wanting to ruin the night because of his own stupidity.

 

"Jealousy?" he asked, looking at the other as he supported his head by resting his chin on the palm of his hand, his elbow digging into the counter to prop him up. Kyungsoo remained silent, gaze not straying away from Baekhyun even once as the latter simply shrugged, curving his lips into his usual playful smile. "Well, jealousy makes everyone more attractive."

 

"Does it?" Kyungsoo asked in a chuckled, mumbling those words against the seam of his bottle before taking a sip, still looking at Baekhyun under his eyelashes as he did so. He didn’t look pissed off anymore. Baekhyun felt oddly warm. Must be the beer.

 

"It does, most people think that way and I do too. Unless it actually gets too much, I guess," he replied, taking a few sips of beer between his words and realizing that the bottle was now empty. He scrunched his nose a bit but chose not to order another one for now, the slight buzz in his veins was already enough to relax him now and he didn’t want to actually get drunk either. Silence settled over them for a few seconds and Baekhyun spent them observing Kyungsoo who did not reply, as if he really didn’t have an opinion on the subject. His next words escaped him before he even registered them. "You do look like the possessive boyfriend type though."

 

And it was true. Baekhyun still wasn’t done trying to figure Kyungsoo out but whenever he formed a theory in his head about Kyungsoo’s personality, he always seemed to be right later on. He had never actually thrown in a supposition about Kyungsoo as a boyfriend until now, however, so he hoped Kyungsoo would just take it as yet another one of Baekhyun’s playful words or random thoughts. That was what he seemed to think half of Baekhyun’s words were anyway. 

 

He really did look like the possessive kind of boyfriend though, and Baekhyun really didn’t know why he was starting to torture himself by trying to imagine it but he had to stop. He was turning into the main character of a love song and he hated it.

 

Kyungsoo simply let out a low chuckle at his words.

 

"And you look like the kind of boyfriend who’d make his lover jealous on purpose," he replied, baritone voice sinking deeper into a see of playfulness. Baekhyun felt himself drowning.

 

It was still an ongoing game of theirs, throw suppositions in the air while trying to figure each other out and so far, Kyungsoo seemed to be able to read him well. He was better at reading Baekhyun than the latter was at reading him, at least.

 

"Well, possessive and angry sex is great," he shrugged casually, almost amazing himself with the way he was able to have this kind of conversation with _Kyungsoo._ "Or so I’ve heard," he added as an afterthought.

 

The other simply chuckled quietly, shaking his head a bit in mock exasperation. He always did that whenever Baekhyun said something stupid and it was a bit endearing, oddly.

 

"Any kind of sex is great if your partner’s good," he eventually said, voice a tad lower than usual and gaze slightly darker as he looked into Baekhyun’s eyes. Maybe it was because of the bar’s lighting. Baekhyun’s heart hadn’t suddenly started beating wildly because of the lights, however.

 

"Are you trying to tell me something?" he drawled out playfully, unconsciously lowering his voice the same way Kyungsoo had. His heart was hammering against his chest and it was so stupid of him when Kyungsoo probably was behaving this way with him because he knew Baekhyun was the kind to flirt with just about anybody but he couldn’t help it.

 

Fortunately, before either of them could say anything and before Baekhyun could let anything he’d regret escape his mouth, he suddenly heard the characteristic thud of a finger tapping against a microphone, a familiar sound that immediately brought a wide grin to his lips as he turned his attention towards the stage. As expected, there stood his friend, guitar in hand as he adjusted the microphone stand’s height before settling properly on his chair and propping the acoustic guitar on his lap. He smiled, looking over at his rather crowded audience and leaning forward to speak into the microphone.

 

"Good evening, everyone. Are you having a nice time?" he asked, ever so polite and kind, his smile widening a bit when a few people shouted their answers to him, especially a few groups of young women on the front line, as close to the stage as possible. He was rather popular, one of the most liked musicians playing in this bar and in many others. "Well, I hope we’ll spend an even better time together while I sing and play for you. I’ll take requests in a bit but first, I’ll play some of my songs for you," he continued, his fingers strumming on the strings once before he blinked, and quickly added a few words, as if he had forgotten something important. "Oh, and my name’s Zhang Yixing."

 

Baekhyun couldn’t help but laugh softly at the adorable way in which his friend introduced himself, not even surprised that he had almost forgotten to say his name since Yixing often forget a thing or two, his phone, what he was supposed to say, or even a meal or two. He never ever forgot his lyrics, though. 

 

The audience laughed along with him, a few voices shouting at Yixing that they already knew his name and causing the latter to laugh softly, a small dot of happiness peeking at them on his cheek as he did so. He heard a few women swoon and he had never been surprised by that, Yixing was both really talented and really charming.

 

"That’s your friend?" he heard Kyungsoo ask.

 

"Yep," he replied but didn’t look him while doing so because Yixing was clearing his throat, preparing himself to sing as he looked into the audience one last time, his gaze eventually finding Baekhyun who immediately perked up and waved at him. Yixing’s dimple greeted him back once again, his smile bigger than earlier for a second before he finally started playing.

 

A general hush fell over the whole room as the melodious guitar filled the silence up, gentle, soothing, yet joyful and catchy. Yixing had always been good at playing guitar and Baekhyun had never had the occasion to see him play another instrument but he knew for sure that nothing could beat the guitar in his eyes and ears. His songs were also always full of happiness and even if most of his lyrics were about love, Baekhyun still enjoyed it more than usual, his smile widening a bit as soon as Yixing parted his lips to sing along to his own melody. 

 

It went on for almost a full hour, Yixing alternating between playing his own songs and taking requests from a really eager audience that always clapped for him and cheered at the end of every song, Baekhyun never forgetting to show his support for his friend by cheering along and always smiling brightly whenever Yixing’s gaze found his in the middle of a song. It had been a while since he had the occasion to listen to Yixing’s music and he realized that he had missed it a lot, his body relaxing as he listened mostly quietly, sometimes singing along and sipping on the beer that he had ordered after a while.

 

He sometimes let his gaze wander to Kyungsoo who seemed to enjoy it as much as he did even if his reaction was more on the quiet side, his lips quirked up from time to time, his body swaying a bit when he found a song he particularly liked, and his fingers drumming on the countertop along the melody. They sometimes exchanged a few comments about the songs, Baekhyun filling him up on the few stories Yixing had told him about them and Kyungsoo listening eagerly. Ballads were obviously unavoidable as they were one of Yixing’s favorite genre as well but Baekhyun didn’t mind because Kyungsoo seemed to enjoy those more, his doe eyes staring at Yixing for the whole duration of all the ballads he sung in an obvious sign of enjoyment.

 

Baekhyun couldn’t be happier but he sometimes felt Kyungsoo’s gaze on him throughout the songs and each time he refrained from looking because he was sure that it must be one of his delusional moments again and he was scared of meeting that same ugly feeling of disappointment again. When he finally snapped, at one point, and looked back at Kyungsoo, his gaze met the latter’s for a second before Kyungsoo smiled a bit and looked away and back at Yixing, leaving Baekhyun to deal with his thunderous heartbeat and the way his chest was oddly feeling warm and cold at the same time. He came to find out that this _feeling_ was almost like having the flu, he felt warm and cold at the same time, he had trouble breathing as if his nose was stuffy from the weather, he had small chest pains, and he could feel beads of sweat trailing down his back. Love songs never had mentioned anything similar to the flu though, but then again, Baekhyun wasn’t sure whether his heart had actually started endlessly serenading Kyungsoo with a love song or not.

 

They didn’t meet gazes in a similar way afterwards, simply enjoying the music silently until Baekhyun couldn’t take it and leaned to start another conversation with him, just to see if he could catch that dark, odd glint in Kyungsoo’s eyes again. It never happened, however, and soon, Yixing was already waving goodbye to his audience, thanking them and telling them to enjoy the rest of the night with lots of drinks and conversation.

 

"So, how did you find him?" Baekhyun immediately asked as soon as Yixing had disappeared from the stage, excitement and curiosity filling his gaze as it met Kyungsoo’s calmer one.

 

"It was nice," the other smiled and oddly, Baekhyun felt himself relaxing. He had already known that Kyungsoo had been enjoying the performances but hearing it from his own mouth felt way better. "He had a nice voice and his Korean is really good. His english too and although I didn’t understand that one Chinese song, the emotions were still conveyed through his voice and the melody. It was really nice."

 

"I knew you would love that one Chinese song," he snorted teasingly, shrugging playfully when Kyungsoo narrowed his eyes at him. "I’m really glad you enjoyed it though."

 

"You make things easily enjoyable," Kyungsoo shrugged before taking a sip of his beer casually, as if he hadn’t just sent Baekhyun’s heart into rampage again. Was he even aware of what he was doing to Baekhyun? Somehow, he hoped he wasn’t.

 

"I guess I do have that kind of effect on people," he shrugged, chuckling softly at the look that Kyungsoo gave him. He didn’t even deny Baekhyun’s words, however, and the latter was about to comment on it before being interrupted.

 

"Baekhyun!"

 

He turned at the call of his name, recognizing that voice amidst the chatter of the patrons surrounding them and the soft melody emanating from the speakers again until the next performer would join the stage.

 

"Yixing," he grinned, the last syllable of his friend’s name muffled when said friend suddenly took him into his arms.

 

"It’s been a while," he heard amidst his own laughter.

 

Yixing’s arms were tight around him and he returned the embrace by wrapping his arms around the  taller’s waist, his face squished against chest since Baekhyun was still sitting down and Yixing was on his feet. Warmth poured into him through Yixing’s hug, they were always warm and comforting and when they finally pulled away, Baekhyun smiled up at him, Yixing’s hands lingering on his shoulders.

 

"If you’re going to miss me so much and hug me so tightly every time I spend a few weeks away from you, I might make a habit out of it," he replied teasingly, amusement growing in him as he watched Yixing’s lower lip unconsciously jut out a little bit while he frowned.

 

"If you disappear for more than a few days again, I’ll come find you and scream into your ears until you remember me," he mumbled, his voice taking on that usual almost-whiny tone whenever he was speaking Korean. It was always more prominent whenever he was a bit upset and Baekhyun found it adorable, it always prevented him from teasing Yixing as much as he’d do to the rest of his friends.

 

"I’m just kidding," he defended himself with a chuckle, gently patting the singer’s lower back. Yixing was always more touchy than any of his other friends and Baekhyun had learned to adjust to him, gently poking him as he gave him an amused but gentle smile. "And how could anyone even forget you? I don’t think that’s possible."

 

Yixing’s smile widened at those words, that adorable dimple peeking at Baekhyun again, tainted rosy like the rest of his cheeks as a probable result of the efforts he put into his performance. Baekhyun couldn’t pay much attention to it however since he closed his eyes when the singer suddenly ruffled his hair, ruining Baekhyun’s long efforts to create the perfect hairstyle by mumbling complaints to him and running his fingers through Baekhyun’s silver locks to create a bird’s nest. Baekhyun didn’t have the heart to scold him, however, not when Yixing seemed to be a bit upset that Baekhyun had neglected him for the past few weeks. They had always been close, ever since Baekhyun had discovered this place on the first night of Yixing’s performance here and had showered the man in compliments as soon as he had seen him brooding at the counter. His voice had cracked for a second because of the nervousness as he sang and Baekhyun had forgotten about it until Yixing had reminded himself, too mesmerized by the rest of the performance. He had said a lot of things to comfort the other and not once had he even exaggerated when assuring him that the performance had been perfect despite the small mistake.They had stuck close after that day and Baekhyun had started attending all of Yixing’s performances to support him, appreciating both his new friend’s talent and his company.

 

He was pulled out of his thoughts and of his battle for his hair’s protection against Yixing’s attacks when he suddenly heard a loud thud next to him, causing him to freeze and causing Yixing’s laughter to abruptly stop. The latter finally pulled his hands away from Baekhyun’s hair and Baekhyun turned to see that the abrupt noise had been caused by Kyungsoo who seemed to have accidentally let his empty bottle of beer drop on the counter a bit too harshly. His fingers had probably slipped a bit. He glanced at Baekhyun, smiling a bit at him before looking back at Yixing. The smile didn’t reach his eyes like it had a few minutes ago.

 

"Aren’t you going to introduce me to your talented friend, Baekhyun?" he suddenly asked and Baekhyun realized that both Yixing and he hadn’t even looked at Kyungsoo for a while. He cleared his throats hoping that he hadn’t come off as too rude.

 

"Of course, sorry. I got caught up since someone seemed to have missed me too much," he playfully narrowed his eyes at Yixing who ignored his accusatory tone to smile at Kyungsoo instead. "Anyway, Yixing this is Kyungsoo, my friend, and Kyungsoo, this is the one and only best singer of our generation, Zhang Yixing."

 

"Stop that," Yixing laughed sheepishly, gently slapping his shoulder but not hurting Baekhyun the slightest bit. On the contrary, the embarrassed blush lingering on the taller’s cheeks was satisfactory. "Nice to meet you," he then said, turning to Kyungsoo and offering him a handshake.

 

"You have a really nice voice," was all Kyungsoo said, smiling back at him even if it still looked smaller than earlier. Maybe he was just getting tired, it was getting late, after all and they hadn’t drunk too much but they had still spent a while here.

 

"Thank you, I’m glad you enjoyed the performance," Yixing smiled, dropping Kyungsoo’s hand to rest his on Baekhyun’s shoulder again. He was standing a bit too close but Baekhyun didn’t mind, that was the way Yixing was.

 

"Kyungsoo here really loves ballads," Baekhyun said, glancing at Kyungsoo to meet his gaze before he looked back up at Yixing when the latter’s fingers gently brushed over his nape out of habbit. "He loved your Chinese one the most," he added since Kyungsoo remained silent. It was odd to see him grow silent so suddenly but maybe that was the way he was when interacting with strangers.

 

"Really? I’m glad then, I really love ballads too," Yixing grinned. "I actually wouldn’t have sung so many if I knew you would be here since Baekhyun prefers brighter songs but I had no idea he was coming since he hasn’t contacted me in weeks."

 

There was the accusatory tone again and Baekhyun gave Yixing his most innocent smile, wrapping his arms around his waist and shaking him gently, hoping that the other would forgive him quickly. 

 

"I’m sorry," he apologized again and he only let go of Yixing when the latter smiled at him, his fingers gently massaging Baekhyun’s nape as if to tell him it was okay. "And you can sing as many ballads as you want, yours are the few I actually enjoy."

 

It wasn’t even a lie, he used to tolerate Yixing’s ballads because he was his friend and he had a way to sing that just pulled you into songs and turned the lyrics into your thoughts. Lately, he learned to enjoy love songs a bit more, however, and it was mainly thanks to Kyungsoo. He didn’t really feel the need to scrunch his nose whenever a sad ballad or any kind of love song reached his ears and tried paying more attention to them whenever he heard some on the radio. He still wasn’t at the point where he’d ever actually download a ballad but he paid more attention to the lyrics and found himself even enjoying them sometimes so he had Kyungsoo to thank for that. Even if the latter had no idea about it and Baekhyun sometimes found himself thinking that he hated love songs more than ever each time Kyungsoo flashed through his mind whenever he accidentally heard one.

 

"If you enjoy them so much then you should come here more often," Yixing said with a shrug, hopeful eyes locking with Baekhyun’s before he glanced at Kyungsoo. "You could even bring Kyungsoo along more often if he likes it here."

 

Kyungsoo still said nothing, however, not even looking back at Yixing as he seemed to pay more attention to the empty bottle between his fingers than to them.

 

"Looks like you can’t live without me anymore," Baekhyun said teasingly when he saw the way Yixing’s smile fell as Kyungsoo didn’t look back at him, hoping that it would take his attention away from the latter. He didn’t know why Kyungsoo’s mood suddenly fell but he did his best not to let it affect him.

 

His words seemed to be effective since Yixing immediately chuckled softly, his gaze softening as his fingers now brushed the small hair on Baekhyun’s nape, twirling the strands at the back of his head slowly, almost as if Yixing himself didn’t realize what he was doing. Baekhyun came to find out as time passed that Yixing liked doing this to him and he never called him out on it since it felt  relaxing anyway.

 

"Who’s fault is that?" Yixing replied, voice gentle and words almost barely audible.

 

Baekhyun was surprised by those words, their meaning slowly creeping into his mind. It sounded familiar and suddenly, the warmth of Yixing’s fingers on his nape turned completely cold and it felt wrong. However, what surprised him even more was Kyungsoo suddenly standing up, his gaze boring into his with an unfamiliar glint, one that Baekhyun couldn’t recognize. He looked angry, looking at Baekhyun with the same pissed off expression he had on when the man from earlier had sent him a drink.

 

"I’m gonna call it a night, it’s getting late. I already paid for our drinks. Have fun."

 

And with those words, Kyungsoo was suddenly gone, not even giving Baekhyun the occasion to protest or bid him a goodnight. Discomfort settled in the pit of his stomach and he frowned, gaze following Kyungsoo’s retreating figure as his words echoed in Baekhyun’s head. He had never spoken to him with that tone, not with the angry echoes of his voice, not with the snap of a lightning hidden beneath his words. 

 

He didn’t like it.

 

He didn’t like the fact that he knew Kyungsoo had just found an excuse to simply flee the place when it wasn’t even that late. They had both stayed awake way past this hour when working on their song and Kyungsoo didn’t mind disturbing his sleep schedule that much. Then why did he suddenly leave when he had seemed fine a few minutes ago? He had seemed fine until Yixing arrived and it didn’t make sense. Yixing hadn’t said anything bad, they had barely even paid attention to Kyungsoo.

 

They had barely paid attention to Kyungsoo. Could it be that he had felt left out? Yixing had tried talking to him though, he had ignored him, looking at his beer instead of talking. He had the same expression he had shown to the man from earlier. It didn’t make sense and Baekhyun hated this because he wasn’t sure whether Kyungsoo was giving him mixed signals or he was just being stupidly hopeful again.

 

He didn’t know but he didn’t want their night to be ruined so he immediately shot up on his feet as well, giving Yixing an apologetic smile and promising to call him tomorrow before running out of the bar without hearing the other’s protests, heartbeat frantic as stepped out. He immediately looked around, gaze jumping around on his surroundings and relief flooding him when he spotted Kyungsoo only a few feet away, heading towards the subway station.

 

"Kyungsoo!" he called out, watching as he stopped on his tracks for a second before turning around and raising an eyebrow at Baekhyun who instantly ran towards him.

 

"Why are you following me?" he asked as soon as Baekhyun was close enough to hear him.

 

"We’ve come here together, we should leave together too," Baekhyun said after a few seconds of surprise. Kyungsoo was frowning at him, still looking very much pissed off and it was odd, it was throwing him off and churning his stomach weirdly, in a really unpleasant way.

 

"You could’ve stayed there with your friend, I didn’t ask you to follow me," Kyungsoo sighed, jaw clenched as if he was containing himself, and Baekhyun still didn’t understand why the other was doing this to him. Why was he acting this way? Why was he giving Baekhyun hope? Why was he pushing Baekhyun to believe he might actually not be too delusional after all?

 

"You just left so suddenly, are you okay?" he asked softly and for the first time ever, Baekhyun found himself thinking before speaking, afraid that he’d worsen the situation. "Is something wrong? Did I do something wrong?"

 

He couldn’t have ruined this. He hadn’t done anything bad. He had brought Kyungsoo there because he had thought he would like it and that had been the case, he had liked the music, he had liked the place and he had even seem to appreciate Yixing at first. Until the latter had joined them at the counter and Baekhyun had given him most of his attention, at least. Mixed signals. He hated them.

 

However, Kyungsoo suddenly snapped at him, his frown hardening and the low but furious tone of his voice slapping Baekhyun hard enough to make him flinch.

 

"Do you really not fucking see what’s wrong, Baekhyun?"

 

"I don’t," he frowned back, upset because not only Kyungsoo was giving him mixed signals but he also was snapping at him without any actual reason, not one that Baekhyun understood at least.

 

"You’re really so damn oblivious," the other muttered, running a hand over his face harshly before looking at Baekhyun for a few silent seconds that only seemed to anger him further more. "And stupid. Can’t you see what you’re doing?"

 

"What am I doing, Kyungsoo?" he snapped back, his heart beating in fear against his ribcage. What had he done? Had he done something wrong? Had he hurt Kyungsoo? What had he done this time? Had he broken Kyungsoo’s heart? Had he done it even when the last thought that always seeped into his mind every night before he went to sleep was that maybe it was for the best that Kyungsoo didn’t return his feelings because at least, Baekhyun wouldn’t break his heart? Why did everything always go wrong? How did he always manage to fuck things up?

 

"You’re always doing the same thing, Baekhyun!" the other raised his voice, throwing his hands up as if this situation was completely over him and he was tired of it. "Do you honestly not see Yixing’s feelings for you?"

 

At those words, he froze, his heart skipping a beat but not out of joy or excitement. He remembered the last thing Yixing had told him, asking him who’s fault it was that he seemed not to be able to live without Baekhyun anymore. Something familiar crept around his shoulders, something cold, tightening, slowly, inch by inch until it squeezed around his neck. Something that he was so used to feeling, something that always broke his heart a little. Fear.

 

"What feelings?" he muttered, his voice sounding shaky to his own ears.

 

Kyungsoo snorted, as if he wasn’t even surprised by Baekhyun’s answer, as if he was mocking himself for even asking that question when the answer should’ve been obvious.

 

"Of course you don’t see it. You never do," Kyungsoo laughed bitterly, closing his eyes for a second as if to get a grip of himself. Baekhyun felt himself go deaf for that single second until he spoke again. "Do you know what’s going to happen in a few days, maybe weeks?"

 

"What?" he whispered, not trusting himself to use a louder tone but stepping closer to Kyungsoo to make sure that he wasn’t going to leave abruptly again.

 

"Yixing is going to confess to you," he deadpanned, gaze loud as it locked into Baekhyun’s. However, the latter couldn’t hear anything over the sudden cacophony in his head. That was Yixing had meant. That was why he was so upset. Baekhyun felt so damn stupid. "And you’re going to reject him because you don’t return his feelings. You never do. You’re going to lose yet another friend and your heart’s going to break a little more. Until when, Baekhyun?"

 

"How is it my fault?" he asked back after a few silent seconds during which he felt like running away. Running away and blasting loud, happy, and noisy music right into his skull, hidden under his blankets and away from the whole world. "Why is it always my fault when it happens? Why do you always blame me whenever someone ends up liking me? Do you really think it makes me happy, Kyungsoo? Do you think I even know why they do? Do you really think I like this kind of situation? Do you-"

 

"It’s your fault, Baekhyun," Kyungsoo cut him off harshly and his voice was once again low and calm but the anger locked in his words was loud and clear to Baekhyun’s ears, to the point that he felt his whole existence freezing for a second as he processed those words. "It’s your fault and deep down, you know it so stop denying it. I already told you before. I already told you to learn from your mistakes and not let the same things happen again but you never fucking learn. If you don’t want to do this for yourself, do it for all the people you’ve broken the heart off and all the hearts that you can still continue breaking so easily," the other spat out, his eyes dark and accusing as he glared right into Baekhyun’s soul, breaking it into two even if Kyungsoo looked as if he hated himself for saying this to Baekhyun. Or maybe he hated Baekhyun for having to say this to him and maybe that was why Baekhyun felt pain shooting through his whole being.

 

"What do you want me to do, Kyungsoo?" he asked quietly, not even to spite the other but because he genuinely wanted an answer, he genuinely needed an answer.

 

Kyungsoo was right. Everyone was right. If this happened so many times then there was no use finding excuses for himself or blaming the other party. Kyungsoo was right and Baekhyun hated it but he hated the idea of losing the other so much more and if Kyungsoo was willing to give him an answer as to how to prevent that from happening, then he would take it. This wasn’t the first time Kyungsoo had insinuated that it was his fault. He didn’t want to lose the other, he didn’t want Kyungsoo to end up like one of those people who left him with nothing but harsh words and pain. Not Kyungsoo. 

 

It was pathetic and he hated the person he was slowly becoming but he would take it. Because he was tired of this, tired of the same thing happening over and over again, tired of breaking hearts and losing friends, and tired of not doing anything about it.

 

"Maybe you could start by preventing yourself from flirting with anyone you meet," Kyungsoo started and he knew that wasn’t really his attention but Baekhyun flinched at those words, pain clenching his heart between its sharp claws. It sounded so bad. It sounded so awful and Baekhyun knew himself, he knew how he usually behaved but he had never used those words to describe his own behavior. No one had ever said that to him with such emotions, such anger and accusation in their voice. "Stop being so fucking kind to everyone. Stop trying to make everyone smile. Stop letting people misunderstand your behavior. Stop complimenting everyone so much. Stop making _everyone_ feel so fucking special for you when they aren’t. Stop giving them false hope only to crush their heart later on."

 

Baekhyun took in every single word, each sentence a blow to his soul, a loud and off-key note that sounded like a scream coming straight out of his heart with each word Kyungsoo mercilessly threw at him. His fingers tightened into fists at his side and he could feel his eyes stinging a little bit with the realization that Kyungsoo was right. Not only was he right but each sentence seemed to come straight from his own heart, his voice quivering a little bit on his last sentence, so briefly that Baekhyun wondered if he had imagined it. Kyungsoo was accusing him the same way he sung his favorite ballads, full of emotion, full of passion, as if those were the lyrics engraved into his soul and he was the main character of a song. It hurt. The thought hurt but he didn’t venture there. Because Kyungsoo knew the only thing Baekhyun could do was break people’s heart.

 

And it hurt but Baekhyun had no right to feel hurt when he had caused so much pain to so many people and he had no right to pity himself either or make Kyungsoo pity him. He didn’t allow the sting in his eyes to turn into drops of pain, he didn’t allow himself to find an excuse and blame someone that wasn’t him. If even Kyungsoo had noticed all those things then he was right and Baekhyun had to stop.

 

He would. Maybe for himself. Maybe for all those people he had hurt. Or maybe because he didn’t want Kyungsoo to become part of those people.

 

A melody in his head wondered in a whisper whether he was too late or not but he paid it no attention. He only looked into Kyungsoo’s eyes, making sure that his gaze was firm, straight, and sure.

 

"Alright," he said, voice pitifully cracking a little bit. He cleared his throat. "God, I’m so fucking stupid," he mumbled to himself, rubbing his face, forgetting that he had makeup on and probably smudging the dark lines on his eyelids. He shook his head. He didn’t want Kyungsoo to feel bad for telling the truth. "Alright. You’re right," he said once again, voice carrying more conviction to Kyungsoo’s ears. "You’re right. I’ll try. I’ll do my best. I promise. Just… Just don’t be mad at me. Please," he finished, hating the way his voice was trembling on his last words but unable to do anything about it when his chest felt too narrow for his heart and Kyungsoo was looking at him with that gaze. That glint. Always that glint. The one that always felt like lyrics stuck in Baekhyun’s head, a melody he knew for sure but that he couldn’t figure out which song it belonged to.

 

It was almost pathetic. He had never felt this way before and maybe he should’ve listened to more love songs instead of stupidly avoiding them. Maybe then, he would’ve been able to prepare himself for the confusion, the pain and the suffocation this feeling brought to him. Because he supposed this was it. This wasn’t just a mere crush anymore. This was love. He briefly wondered if that was what it felt like to hear hurtful words from the person you nurtured feelings for and fear instantly seeped into his veins, whispering in his head that this was bad, that this was scary, that he shouldn’t have been so weak and let himself fall on the trap he had tried avoiding his whole life. However, he ignored it all.

 

He didn’t want to lose Kyungsoo and if he had to change in order to keep him, then Baekhyun would do it.

 

Kyungsoo simply sighed, his features losing their tightness, his gaze losing its ferocity, and his whole body relaxing. Baekhyun took a deep breath only when Kyungsoo curled his lips into a small smile that wasn’t as big as the smiles he usually gave Baekhyun but that still made his heart swoon in relief. Kyungsoo wasn’t angry. He hadn’t broken his heart. Not yet. Not enough to destroy everything between them. His soul slowly started mending together, hesitantly, as air made its way into his lungs when the fear wrapped around his neck like a tight rope started loosening. He wouldn’t break his heart. He wouldn’t.

 

"Let’s just go home," Kyungsoo simply said before walking away and when noticing that he was walking at a normal pace instead of a rushed one like earlier, Baekhyun pushed himself forward to catch up to him.

 

He couldn’t find anything to say from fear of upsetting the other again but the mere fact that Kyungsoo was allowing him to walk alongside with him was somehow enough for Baekhyun to figure out that they were okay now. Maybe not entirely okay, maybe there still was words to be exchanged, maybe Baekhyun had cut off the argument as soon as possible because he was scared, maybe Kyungsoo had refrained himself from pouring out everything he wanted to say for a reason Baekhyun couldn’t comprehend yet, maybe this had ended way too quickly for them to even say they had solved this argument properly, but they were okay. 

 

Kyungsoo didn’t seem like the kind of person who’d linger on a single emotion for too long.

 

"I’m sorry for snapping at you," Kyungsoo mumbled a few minutes later, when they were nearing the subway station after a silent journey during which Baekhyun couldn’t prevent himself from sneaking glances at the other.

 

Those few words were enough for Baekhyun to forget about how painful it had all been and it was odd, Baekhyun had always been the kind to hold grudges. However, Yixing had sung a song about not being able to refuse anything to the person you loved earlier, about not being able to stay angry or hurt at them. Maybe he needed to trust lyrics a bit more.

 

"Can I crash at your place?" Baekhyun abruptly asked instead of replying because he didn’t want to open that topic up again and he was _weak._

 

"Why?" Kyungsoo asked, puzzlement obvious in his voice but amusement peeking at Baekhyun on the quirked up corner of his lips. 

 

They were ignoring it. They were acting as if nothing had happened. Maybe that was another one of their similarities, Baekhyun thought, ignoring complicated things so easily.

 

"You make great pancakes for breakfast," he mumbled, shrugging.

 

It was an excuse. Kyungsoo’s pancakes were pleasant but Kyungsoo himself was even more pleasant and Baekhyun was just weaker than he’d ever thought he could be. He just wanted to spend more time with Kyungsoo. He didn’t want their night to end on such a bad note and Baekhyun had already spent the night at his house once, he had been over during the day and late into the night several times as well. It wouldn’t be such a big deal.

 

Or maybe he was also more stupid than he thought he could be because this was so random and Kyungsoo had no reason to say yes, especially not after their little argument.

 

"Fine, but you’ll sleep on the couch," the other simply said, however, and Baekhyun was more surprised than relieved. 

 

He had to bite his lower lip hard to conceal a stupid grin, butterflies dancing all over his soul, flapping their wings to the rhythm of Baekhyun’s hammering heart.

 

They never left, lingering in the pit of his stomach joyfully even until Baekhyun had ended up dragging Kyungsoo to his own bed and telling him that it was no big deal, that they had already shared a bed anyway and that it was rude to make his most precious guest sleep on the couch. Kyungsoo had sighed, arguing with an amused smile only to let Baekhyun wake up in the warmth of his embrace the following morning.

 

As if nothing was out of the usual, they had smiled at each other first thing in the morning and Baekhyun had sung a bright song off-tune to Kyungsoo until the latter had no choice but to leave the bed and cook his delicious pancakes in order to shut Baekhyun up.

 

Maybe Baekhyun should officially add pancakes next to their project in his list of excuses to spend more time with Kyungsoo. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"You haven’t been slapped in a while, Baekhyun, you’re getting rusty and making my life boring."

 

Baekhyun looked up at the familiar snarky tone of his best friend’s voice, his already furrowed eyebrows turning into a complete frown as soon as he laid his gaze on the snickering boy leaned against the doorframe of his bedroom. 

 

"Maybe that’s because _you_ have a boring life, Jongdae," he retorted with a snort, without any real bite since what Jongdae has said wasn’t even too insulting or stupid for once.

 

"Maybe that’s only because _you’re_ in my life, Baekhyun," the other replied, obnoxiously mimicking Baekhyun’s words and tone. Baekhyun felt like throwing his pencil at his face but he was too lazy to bother standing up and getting it back once Jongdae would decide to grant him with peace. "But seriously, how come I haven’t heard you complain about being called an asshole in more than two weeks? That’s a new record."

 

"I don’t know, shouldn’t you be happy that I don’t get slapped and insulted instead of questioning it?" he mumbled, letting his gaze fall back to the almost blank sheet of paper in front of him, laid on his desk.

 

"I am happy. Mostly," Jongdae added, as if in afterthought and Baekhyun threw him a halfhearted glare. "I’m just wondering how that happens when you used to complain to me at least once a week. The last thing I heard was about Yerim and that was almost three weeks ago."

 

The worst thing about this was Jongdae was right and somehow, hearing that surprised Baekhyun. He had almost not realized that the thing he hated the most hadn’t happened to him in such a long time.

 

"Maybe I’ve learned from my mistakes," he mumbled even if it felt nice to be able to pronounce those words.

 

"Then I’d say it was about damn time," Jongdae laughed and Baekhyun curled his lips into a light smile.

 

He was right. It had been about time and Jongdae himself had told him numerous times that what he was doing was wrong even if Baekhyun had never really been able to see it. It was different now. And it was all thanks to Kyungsoo, somehow.

 

He had promised him more than a week ago that he would try his best to stop breaking hearts and blaming the other party afterwards, that he would fix his behavior and stop hurting everyone around him. It hadn’t turned out to be that easy, however, trying not to act that way, overly friendly, overly _flirty,_ too caring and accidentally making everyone around him feel special only to tell them later on that they in fact weren’t. It wasn’t even a habit, it was just the way Baekhyun was, it was in his nature and for a long time he had told himself that because it was in his nature, he didn’t have to change himself. Kyungsoo helped him realize that he had been wrong, however, and ever since that day, Baekhyun did his best to change. It was odd, how a few words from Kyungsoo had been enough to finally make him realize his own stupidity but Baekhyun knew that it wasn’t just because of those words the other had told him, it was because of the emotion with which he had pronounced those words. As if he had experienced the exact thing he was asking Baekhyun not to do.

 

To this day, Baekhyun still didn’t know whether he had imagine that last fact or not but nonetheless, he still did his best. It was difficult, he still sometimes found himself complimenting a nice girl just because she had a pretty smile and he wanted her to show it more to the world, he still hadn't been able to reject one or two offers to hang out with someone even if he now knew it wasn’t just an offer to hang out for the other party, it was an offer for a date. It was difficult to change himself but he was slowly doing it, he had considerably slowed down on the compliments and the _dates_ , he had also stopped messaging all his acquaintances to ask for their whereabouts, and he managed to flee people whenever they were getting too touchy and friendly most of the time.

 

He still had progress to do but as Jongdae said, he hadn’t received any confession in almost three weeks and that was still a good first step. The last time it had happened was with Yerim and besides the small incident with Yixing, no one had ever shown any strong kind of interest for Baekhyun which led him to wonder if he had already tried changing himself before Kyungsoo had explicitly asked him to a week ago. Maybe he had. However, maybe he also wouldn’t have been able to make so much progress if he wasn’t spending so much time with Kyungsoo. Once again, Baekhyun had expected the other to put some distance between them after their argument at the bar but on the contrary, they had started spending even more time together, continuing to text each other everyday for a couple hours, sometimes the whole day, and seeing each other practically everyday as well, at the coffee shop, at either of their apartments, or at school. Somehow, Kyungsoo was always there to look at him insistently whenever an acquaintance suddenly engaged a conversation with him, stepping too close to him or being too touchy with him until Baekhyun told them that he had a class to go to or a paper to work on. Kyungsoo was always there to take Baekhyun’s phone from his hand and send a firm message to whoever was insisting for a date and Baekhyun had a hard time refusing more than once. He probably had lost a few friends but somehow, he didn’t really mind as he didn’t really feel like spending time with anyone but Kyungsoo anyway.

 

However, spending more time with Kyungsoo somehow led him to constantly think about the fact that he still had to do his part of the project.

 

His eyes slid down to what he had written so far and he read over the four words on the otherwise blank sheet before scrunching his nose in distaste and letting the tip of his pencil cover them in black as he scratched all over them, more than unsatisfied with them. He had been trying to write lyrics for their project song the whole day, locking himself up in his room since this morning and never once leaving it up until now. He hadn’t gotten anything done, however, simply wasting paper and messing his room after crumpling up dozens of sheets of paper and discarding them all around him in frustration. The sun was setting now and he hadn’t gotten even a single word that pleased him, yet alone a single line. They were running out of time, the song was complete and Baekhyun was in charge of the lyrics but he just couldn’t do it. 

 

Finals were in less than three weeks and their project’s deadline was around that time as well and he felt like crying just while thinking about the fact that not only was he going to study for days in order to pass those finals but he’d also have to write perfect lyrics.

 

He let out a frustrated groan, crumbling yet another mostly blank sheet between his fingers and throwing it over his shoulder out of spite.

 

"Why are you so grumpy?" he heard Jongdae again, almost startling at the sound of his voice since he had basically forgotten that his best friend was still there.

 

"I can’t write those damn lyrics," he sighed, running a hand through his unruly, and slightly greasy hair. He briefly realized that he hadn’t taken a bath in almost three days now.

 

"For the song you’re making with your crush?" Jongdae wondered as he stepped closer to Baekhyun only to step back, his nose scrunched up in distaste. "When did you last take a shower?"

 

"Shut up, don’t call him like that. He has a fucking name," he mumbled.

 

"What’s your song about?" Jongdae asked instead.

 

"It should be about youth, a relationship that’s rather new maybe. Something fresh and cheesy," he sighed again. Even he had a hard time grasping the theme of their song no matter how many times Kyungsoo had explained it to him.

 

"You’re good at writing lyrics though," Jongdae hummed, genuine concern pulling his eyebrows into a frown. "Write whatever comes to your mind."

 

"Nothing comes to my mind," he frowned, looking up at his best friend with pleading eyes now. "What’s your song about?"

 

"It’s a secret," the other singsonged, obnoxiously winking at Baekhyun who once again prevented himself from throwing something at him. 

 

"I just told you what my song was about."

 

"Not my fault if you can’t keep things to yourself."

 

Baekhyun saw him shrug before he closed his eyes, rubbing his face with a hand. He could feel the oncoming headache already and Jongdae was worsening everything.

 

"Why don’t you try writing about things you like?" Jongdae suggested more seriously, probably seeing that Baekhyun was in no mood to play around with him.

 

"Like what?" the other grumbled, looking at him with an almost hopeful glint in his eyes. 

 

Jongdae was good at writing lyrics too, even better than Baekhyun was and the other wasn’t scared of admitting that fact.

 

"I don’t know," he shrugged and when his lips curved into that smile that still made him look like the Cheshire cat Baekhyun had always hated since his childhood, he felt his hopes crumbling down little by little, with each word Jongdae pronounced. "Sex, curves, dicks, one night stands… You also like chocolate and strawberry."

 

"Get the fuck out before I shove this pencil down your throat," he snapped, pulling out another blank sheet and intending to ignore the disturbance until it disappeared.

 

"I don’t swing that way, Baekhyun. Keep your dick to yourself."

 

And this time Baekhyun couldn’t stop the few pens that flew out of his hand and collided with Jongdae’s face, the latter cackling as he ran out of the room like an annoying three-year old.

 

"Maybe you should write about your first love!"

 

Of course, Jongdae wouldn’t shut up even if miles were separating them and those words were the last thing Baekhyun heard from the hallway before the sound of Jongdae’s bedroom door snapping shut reached his ears.

 

He sighed, cursing his best friend under his breath.

 

That was the only suggestion that he could take seriously, even if it would’ve sounded absurd weeks ago.

 

First love. He supposed he had one now.

 

His eyes slowly slid to his phone, the device resting on the desk as close to his hand as possible without disturbing him too much since he wanted to be able to see his phone lighting up with a notification as soon as it did.

 

However, he knew it wouldn’t. It hadn’t for three whole days, or rather it hadn’t lighted up with a notification from the name he wanted to see and deep down, Baekhyun knew that that was the only reason why he was so on edge nowadays.

 

Kyungsoo hadn’t messaged him in three whole days, he hadn’t replied to any of Baekhyun’s texts, not even to a link he had sent him to the trailer of the new movie he knew the other was expecting. He had sent numerous texts to him on the first day before giving up as he didn’t want the other to think that he was being annoying by spamming him which resulted in not a single message exchanged between them in two more days, a total of three days that felt like a lifetime to Baekhyun. He was worried but not too much since Jongdae had told him that he had caught a glimpse of Kyungsoo in their usual coffee shop only yesterday and more than worried, Baekhyun had suddenly felt hurt. Kyungsoo always let him know whenever he was at _their_ coffee shop, usually.

 

Was he avoiding Baekhyun? Why wasn’t he replying to his texts despite not being sick to the point of being unable to lift his hand up from under a blanket? Had Baekhyun done something wrong? He had read over their last few texts at least a dozen times in the past three days, however, and Kyungsoo had seemed completely fine, joking around with him despite keeping a serious tone in his texts like he always did. He had even been using small emojis here and there lately. Why was he suddenly avoiding Baekhyun?

 

He didn’t know but it suddenly felt really, _really_ annoying to him because here was Baekhyun, doing his best to keep his promise and change things that Kyungsoo - and a few other people - found wrong about him while Kyungsoo allowed himself not to communicate wit him for _three whole days._ Baekhyun knew he hadn’t done anything wrong, he was sure of it this time because if that had been the case, Kyungsoo would’ve let him know the way he did that night, at the bar. Why was he the only making efforts? What was he even making efforts for anyway? Why was he getting ignored without any reason despite making so much efforts when he probably didn’t even have any reason to since he didn’t seem to matter that much to Kyungsoo?

 

After five long minutes spent glaring at his phone and waiting for a message that never came, he finally snapped, his hand shooting up and his thumbs drumming on the screen before he was able to stop himself, the message sent to Kyungsoo before he even realized what he was doing.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘where the fuck are u’_

 

He kept his eyes over the message he had just sent on a whim, hating himself for being so weak but forgetting all about it when a small bubble with three dots suddenly appeared, Kyungsoo typing in his reply before sending it almost immediately. He hadn’t expected to get a reply so quickly after three whole days of silence.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Here.’_

 

Baekhyun couldn’t contain the small snort that escaped his lips. Kyungsoo had ignored all his messages for three whole days only to reply to him with a mere small word at the end. Somehow, he felt that small word pinching his heart. Maybe Kyungsoo had just not felt like talking to him. Maybe he had grown tired of him. Maybe he just didn’t feel the need to constantly communicate with Baekhyun the way the latter did. It shouldn’t be surprising. Kyungsoo didn’t see him the same way as Baekhyun saw him. 

 

That wasn’t what his fingers seemed to want to say, however, and Baekhyun surprised himself once again when he pressed the send button without thinking.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘why haven’t u been messaging me’_

 

It was a natural question. It was only natural of him to wonder what had happened for Kyungsoo to suddenly stop messaging him when they used to text everyday. Sometimes, Kyungsoo was even the one to initiate it, he even had started replying to Baekhyun as quickly as the latter replied to him when it used to take him hours to reply when they had first started texting. His chest felt disgustingly tingly at the thought.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Why?’_

 

Why? True. Why? Why would Kyungsoo have to constantly message Baekhyun? That was a good question. One that Baekhyun couldn’t reply to because what was he supposed to say? That the past three days had been the shittiest of his life and that he missed Kyungsoo to the point that he had barely gotten any sleep last night? Baekhyun could barely even admit those things to himself yet alone to Kyungsoo. He settled on something else.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘cuz we have a project to work on??’_

 

The usual excuse would always work. 

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Sorry, I was hanging out with a friend.’_

 

That reply took more than a minute to come and Baekhyun instantly frowned as he read it over. A friend? Had Kyungsoo forgotten about him for three whole days just because he was hanging out with a _friend?_ Baekhyun felt something sharp and ugly beat in his heart, something weird, something that didn’t feel nice at all. Something that was always described as green in love songs but that he’d describe as annoying instead.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘for three days? they stole ur phone? tied u to a chair and fed u rainbows??? who is it even?’_

 

He was aware of how bratty and annoying he sounded but he couldn’t help it. He hated it but he couldn’t help it.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Chanyeol. And no, we’ve simply decided to start a movie marathon.’_

 

It sounded so cold and Kyungsoo most of the time sounded cold while texting but this time, Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel slightly hurt by it. Maybe he was really disturbing Kyungsoo. That movie marathon seemed too sudden too. He had the vague memory of Kyungsoo once telling him that he usually had movie marathons with his best friend when one of them wasn’t feeling well. That didn’t change the fact that Kyungsoo didn’t seem to mind not being in contact with him as much as Baekhyun did. But if he really was disturbing Kyungsoo then the latter wouldn’t reply to his messages so quickly now.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘why are u suddenly having a movie marathon?’_

 

He wasn’t asking out of spite. He just was genuinely curious. Had something happened to Kyungsoo? Was he okay? Before he could create any worrisome scenarios about the other’s health in his head, another message popped up and he found himself suddenly unable to breath.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘I thought I was the one supposed to look like the possessive kind of boyfriend.’_

 

His heart suddenly jumped in his ribcage, thundering in his chest. He had been the one to pronounce those words to Kyungsoo that day at the bar. Was Kyungsoo saying that he was acting like a possessive boyfriend? Was that a complaint? Or was he just being teasing? Why the hell didn’t Kyungsoo just text like any other normal college student instead of an old business man? Why couldn’t he just put something to indicate whether he was joking or not? It seemed to be a playful sentence, however. Baekhyun knew him enough to be able to hear those texted words in his head with the playful tone of Kyungsoo’s low voice.

 

He took a deep breath in and typed his reply, hesitating before sending it but still doing it because he was stupid and weak and a damn masochist all thanks to Kyungsoo.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘u just downgraded to shitty boyfriend type which u do seem to be since u didnt message me at all for three days’_

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘I wasn’t aware that I was your boyfriend.’_

 

Blood drained from his face and he backtracked immediately, cursing himself for five whole minutes before sending in his reply.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘ur my project partner the commitment is as big as being my boyfriend’_

 

He continued cursing himself and biting his nails to the bone for ten whole minutes after sending it in, unable to pull his gaze away from their conversation thread. Had he been too obvious? Was he really behaving like a clingy boyfriend? Had Kyungsoo just called him out on it or had he just teased him about it? He was used to the other teasing him that way and even if Baekhyun had stopped flirting with basically everyone around him, that didn’t mean he had stopped letting that side of himself out in front of Kyungsoo who always returned it in his own way. Had it been too much this time though? Baekhyun hadn’t even tried flirting with him, he had just made a fool of himself because he missed Kyungsoo too damn much and hadn’t been able to filter his words out.

 

He didn’t know. He didn’t know anything about their situation, what was between them, why Kyungsoo never called him out on his flirty side that he now tried showing to no one but the other when he had gotten angry at Baekhyun more than a week ago because of it. He didn’t know. It all was confusing but the only thing he knew was that he started missing Kyungsoo all over again when the reply he was expecting never came.

 

It never came and for the next three hours, Baekhyun tried his best to focus on something else because there was no reason to worry about Kyungsoo if he was just watching some stupid movies with his best friend instead of texting Baekhyun. It still made him upset, however, as the whole movie marathon thing just seemed like an excuse and instead of saying anything, Kyungsoo had simply stopped replying to him. Maybe that last message had been too much. Maybe Baekhyun should really stop torturing himself so much when he was already on the jealousy stage of this whole issue. He had looked up a few things about love on the internet yesterday and he had stumbled upon a list of the various stages of falling in love. If you reached the possessiveness stage, it meant that you were in a critical situation and Baekhyun remembered snapping his laptop shut after reading that article and calling Jongdae to tell him to buy a pack of beer on his way home.

 

Either way, he did his best not to think about Kyungsoo. If the other was able to go three whole days without worrying about him, then Baekhyun could too. He even gave up on writing lyrics out of spite, watching a movie instead and hoping that Kyungsoo would message him soon so he could ignore him for a few hours and then reply to him with something along the lines of _sorry I was watching a movie way more interesting than you and I didn’t see your message._

 

However, as soon as his phone chimed with the notification of a text message, Baekhyun instantly paused the movie and almost fell off the bed in his haste to grab his phone as soon as possible. 

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Alright, I can give you attention now, my cute little needy project partner.’_

 

As soon as he read those words, he felt gentle flames igniting in his cheeks, no doubt reflecting a pinkish color on them while simultaneously melting him whole.

 

Kyungsoo wasn’t upset at him, he noted with relief. On the contrary, he had never called him anything so adorable and when his heart suddenly started singing and flapping around like a joyful bird, Baekhyun almost forgot all about his anger and the upset emotions twirling around him and tiring him out only a few seconds ago.

 

Once again, his hands moved on their own and before he knew it, he had already pressed the call button and the phone was pressed against his ear, his heartbeat way faster than the monotonous ringing of the line waiting for someone to pick up.

 

It lasted only three seconds before the flat beeping was replaced by the low, chocolatey sound of Kyungsoo’s voice  as he said nothing more than a small _hello_ and somehow, his voice was always lower through the phone but it seemed even worse this time, judging by the way his stomach churned and tingles traveled down his spine at the same time. Or maybe it was just because he hadn’t heard his voice in days.

 

"I took a screenshot of that last message so you can’t ever deny that I’m cute anymore," Baekhyun said because being playful was his comfort zone and the only thing he could cling onto whenever he was in this unfamiliar situation, attacked by completely foreign feelings.

 

Kyungsoo laughed softly and he let the sound wash over him like warm droplets of water cleaning his worn out body at the end of long and tiring day. Or maybe his voice sounded like the embrace and the comfort of a blanket on a stormy night. It also sounded like a summer breeze though. It sounded like so many things but Baekhyun knew that it also sounded better than his favorite song.

 

 _"No one can deny that you’re cute, you break too many hearts for that,"_ the other replied softly.

 

"Not on purpose," Baekhyun furrowed his eyebrows, letting his voice take on a slightly upset edge when he was reminded of that cursed fact about himself.

 

 _"I can see that now,"_ he heard, Kyungsoo’s voice quieter now, low but not with amusement.

 

There was something there. There was always something. Baekhyun was used to it now, they’d been doing this for a while. Laughing together, smiling at each other too widely, one of them turning his gaze away when the other caught him staring, hands lingering on each other’s lower back or arm for a second too long, and teasing and playful words always covering a hidden meaning that Baekhyun wasn’t sure he was reading right or not. It was almost like a push and pull, a yes and then a no, a smile and then accusing words, but Baekhyun still didn’t know because everything always remained unsaid between them and neither of them ever had the courage to just ask and dig deeper or simply put an end to things. Or maybe Baekhyun was the only one to feel this way, maybe he was imaging everything or maybe there really was something between them. He should ask. For his own sake, he should gather his courage and say something.

 

However, Baekhyun didn’t have the courage to do that. He never did. Maybe he never would, not when a part of himself still hated love songs, the part that always skipped love songs for something else after less than a full minute into it, when fear was starting to crawl in whenever Kyungsoo’s face flashed brighter in his head along the lyrics. Baekhyun used to never relate to love songs but now, every single love song he couldn’t listen to was starting to be about Kyungsoo.

 

But he didn’t have the courage to say that so he cursed himself inwardly but, wanting to hear Kyungsoo’s voice again, he spoke.

 

"So, how are you?"

 

 _"I’m fine, a bit tired from watching movies the whole day, I guess,"_ the other replied, his voice taking in that neutral tone again, as if he hadn’t just implied that he was familiar with the way Baekhyun broke hearts.

 

Or maybe he had just misunderstood him. He hoped he had misunderstood Kyungsoo. He didn’t want to break his heart. Maybe that was the sole reason behind Baekhyun’s lack of courage.

 

 _"What about you?"_ Kyungsoo asked when Baekhyun simply hummed in reply.

 

"I’m fine, as usual," he shrugged out of habit even though Kyungsoo couldn’t see it.

 

_"That’s great. I’m glad."_

 

It was almost funny the way things had suddenly taken an awkward when it had never happened before. Scratch that, it wasn’t funny. It was slightly painful but Baekhyun didn’t even know why. He could feel things changing between them but he just wasn’t _sure_ and Kyungsoo wasn’t helping either.

 

He briefly wondered if maybe Kyungsoo was as scared as he was but before he could dwell on it properly, the line grizzled a bit as Kyungsoo sighed.

 

 _"If you don’t say anything about the project, I’m really going to think that you just threw a tantrum because you were missing me,"_ the other said and there it was again, that little lilt, that small note of playfulness, the question hidden beneath those words.

 

Baekhyun felt his sanity slowly slipping away from his grasp and was it even normal for him to have the urge to melt, swoon, laugh, and cry at the same time whenever Kyungsoo spoke to him with _that_ tone? Or maybe spoke to him with any tone at all.

 

"You called me just for the project?" he questioned, letting his voice take on an upset edge that he hoped Kyungsoo would see as a playful one.

 

_"Isn’t that also why you messaged me?"_

 

"You seem to have jumped on it right away to use it as an excuse," he singsonged, fully aware that Kyungsoo was always particularly irritated whenever he used that tone on him.

 

 _"Maybe you’re the one who used it as an excuse and you’re just trying to cover it up by accusing me,"_ was Kyungsoo’s teasing reply and Baekhyun could almost imagine him in his head, his narrowed eyes and that faint, half smile that always sent his heart into a tremor.

 

"Maybe that’s what you wish I did," he retorted, glad that he could reply to the other even if he was melting away.

 

Silence followed his words for a few seconds before they both burst into laughter almost simultaneously, Kyungsoo’s low chuckles marrying Baekhyun’s higher tone to perfection, swirling together in the air and meshing to form a joyful symphony.

 

Once they both calmed down, Baekhyun took a deep breath and sighed his next words out.

 

"I’m struggling with the lyrics."

 

 _"You’ve been struggling for a while, that isn’t new,"_ the other replied and to anyone, it might have sounded like an accusation but Baekhyun managed to pick out the amused echo of Kyungsoo’s words as he spoke.

 

"Yeah but I haven’t seen you at all in three days so it’s worse than ever," he said before he even realized and whatever happened always happened because Baekhyun had no damn filter and blurted out everything that was on his mind without hesitation and he hated it a bit.

 

 _"Are you trying to say I’m your muse?"_ he heard the other say teasingly but it was fainter than usual, as if his words held a bit of seriousness after all.

 

"If you were, you’d be a pretty shitty muse since inspiration doesn’t come at all," he mumbled, trying to pass it off as nothing, before biting his lower lip and not being able to contain his next words. "Why? Do you want to be my muse?"

 

 _"You’d be needier than you already are if I was your muse,"_ the other snorted softly.

 

"You literally came to check whether I was alive or not last week because I lost my phone and could’t reply to your texts for a whole day, I think you’re the needy one here," he snorted back, mimicking the other even if he felt his insides warming up at the memory of a worried Kyungsoo knocking at his bedroom door, adorable with his doe eyes and his plushy lips pulled into a worried straight line as he scolded Baekhyun for losing his phone. He had decided that losing his phone had been worth it, especially since Kyungsoo had glared at Jongdae enough to make him shrink back into his room and leave them alone for the rest of the evening after he had revealed having hidden Baekhyun’s phone himself as a prank.

 

Maybe Baekhyun had fallen in love with Kyungsoo a little more that day.

 

_"That’s because I’m a kind person and you’re being an ungrateful brat."_

 

Baekhyun couldn’t help but laugh at the playful accusation before parting his lips to defend himself and argue back but before he could say anything, Kyungsoo cut him off with a yawn and when he glanced at the clock on his laptop, he noticed that it was actually nearing midnight now. 

 

"You should go to bed," he said softly even if talking to Kyungsoo was nice and seemed to breath life back into him.

 

 _"I will in a bit,"_ the other replied, his voice now taking on an adorably sleepy edge. _"Do you want me to send you the whole song? I realized that I haven’t actually sent what I last recorded to you and it might help you with writing the lyrics."_

 

"I’d love that," he smiled, really hoping that it would be helpful.

 

He didn’t want to disappoint Kyungsoo and no matter how many times the latter told him that they could just work on the lyrics together, he wanted to do it on his own. Maybe he just wanted to impress the other.

 

Either way, he was hopeful and even if they spent a few more minutes just updating each other on what had happened in the past three days without that awkward air surrounding them, Baekhyun still forced himself to bid Kyungsoo a good night sooner than he would’ve liked. He didn’t want the other to be tired tomorrow, it was Monday and the start of a new school week so he pressured Kyungsoo into hanging up, the latter promising to go to sleep as soon as he’d send the recording to Baekhyun.

 

Unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said about Baekhyun who spent a major part of the night awake, simply listening to the strums of Kyungsoo’s guitar accompanied by the occasional gentle, low humming that followed the rhythm and set the pace for the lyrics that should be sung on the melody. 

 

Maybe he also ended up deciding that this recording would be his second favorite song, right after the sound of Kyungsoo’s warm, soothing, and addictive laughter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It had been easy to fall back into their usual rhythm after that, with the texts exchanged everyday for a couple hours, their study dates at the coffee shop, and Baekhyun randomly showing up at Kyungsoo’s apartment so they could watch a movie together. Once again, the conversation they had on the phone and the hidden meanings beneath their words had been forgotten, or at least ignored since there was no way Baekhyun would ever forget how that phone call had affected him.

 

A week had passed just like that and oddly, they were getting closer with each passing day, nearing a line that they both stubbornly tried keeping between them, toeing along that thick line, peeking at each other and maybe letting their hands stretch out to the other side to reach the other once in a while. They never grabbed each other’s hand, however, always standing on their respective side of the line and as tiring as it could be sometimes, Baekhyun couldn’t help but wonder if that was for the best. After all, he wasn’t really breaking Kyungsoo’s heart if he didn’t reach out to it. His own heart was also left intact. Maybe it ached from time to time, whenever Kyungsoo looked at him with that heart-shaped smile, whenever he woke up from a dream that he couldn’t help but wish was real in the middle of the night, or every time he listened to the recording that Kyungsoo had sent him. It was painful. It was an unfamiliar ache, one that he hated but one that he was starting to familiarize himself with. It was bearable. Most of the time. Much more bearable than a totally broken heart would be, at least.

 

Things went back to normal, as if nothing had changed, and the worst thing was that nothing had really changed for Baekhyun, especially about his problem concerning the lyrics that he had to write but that he still couldn’t get around to pour on the paper even when they now had two small weeks left before finals week and the deadline of their project.

 

It just didn’t work. Words flew through his head, always, one by one, but whenever he tried gathering them together to form beautiful and meaningful sentences, he suddenly felt like a nine-year old making his first attempt at poetry. He sometimes told himself that it was normal, that there was nothing wrong with him, that it was probably just the stress brought on by the rapidly approaching exams and the amount of time he spent on studying for the surprisingly many theoretical subjects he had. It was a lot, adding to that the whole falling in love issue that still stupidly scared him and the pressure he put on himself concerning their project, it might be understandable. However, time was flying away and he only had two weeks left to write those damn lyrics about a theme that he had never liked yet alone written about. 

 

He only had two weeks left and the mere thought was enough to make him draw dark lines all over the few lame lyrics that he had managed to write after locking himself up in his room once again. He had started this morning and it was already past lunch time, the afternoon sun shining brightly on him as if to mock him for his sudden lack of talent. He had dozens of songs written, some of them better than the rest but still, he had written a bunch of songs in his life, so many lyrics about so many themes while avoiding the dreaded concept of falling in love and now, when that was the only concept he needed to focus on, his head was completely blank.

 

He had two weeks left and late at night, whenever he woke up from a dream about heart shaped lips, low chuckles, doe eyes, and a first love he was a bit scared of, Baekhyun couldn’t help but wonder if it would all end in two weeks. Would Kyungsoo stop talking to him once they would be done with their project? Would he start ignoring him? What if he had only indulged in Baekhyun all this time because of their project? What if he actually secretly hated him? When did Baekhyun even become so stupidly insecure? And all because of a boy, a boy who had a nice voice, a handsome smile, a soothing voice, a warm embrace at night, and who looked at him as if he found new things to figure out in Baekhyun every single day.

 

A loud sigh escaped his lips and Baekhyun let his head fall down on his desk, his forehead crashing against its hard surface just heavily enough to distract him from his thoughts with a bit of pain. He wished the small collision against his forehead would help his brain jump into productivity and send inspiration right to his mind but of course, things never went the way Baekhyun wished they did.

 

Maybe he should drop the lyrics for today and study for his finals instead, he had an entire subject to seriously review because his teacher sucked and never explained things well enough for him to just understand as soon as he heard him say those things. Or maybe he should just drop everything and move somewhere else altogether, far from finals and Kyungsoo. 

 

The first thought that popped in his head like an obnoxious neon sign after that was that he probably wouldn’t even be able to breath without seeing Kyungsoo once a day anymore yet alone move to the other side of the world and cut the ties with him.

 

His phone suddenly vibrated loudly against the desk’s hard surface, startling him out of his misery and finally giving him something else to think about. He grabbed it, movements slow as his constant streak of failure was starting to wear him down mentally, but as soon as he saw the name on the notification, he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to cry because he had waited for this message the whole day or because that message was the last thing he needed right now.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘Do you want to hang out with me today?’_

 

He couldn’t help but frown while reading the message, finding it random since he had sent a few messages to Kyungsoo this morning and the latter hadn’t replied at all until now. However, this kind of message shouldn’t be too surprising when Baekhyun himself sent the same thing to Kyungsoo maybe a bit too often.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘where?’_

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘I thought it would be great to go to the amusement park. The weather’s nice and it’s a Saturday.’_

 

He bit his lower, reading over the message a few times before gathering the strength to reply. He had two weeks left and he was even more of a stupid masochist than he used to be two weeks ago.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘ohhhhohoho are u suddenly asking me out on a cute date?’_

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘It’s for the project. You have to see what innocent young love is like in order to write a song about it. There’ll be plainly of disgustingly cheesy teenagers around us, you should observe them and learn how to be innocent.’_

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘sounds like an excuse to me’_

 

He scrunched his nose a little bit while reading his reply, wondering if maybe that wasn’t the best thing to send in. It was better to ignore the small jab about innocence though, and he didn’t want to lie to Kyungsoo while saying that he had things under control and that he was progressing on their lyrics. He had already done that once and Kyungsoo had ignored him a whole day after learning that Baekhyun had in fact lied to him and that he was basically burning in the pits of hell, the flames around him consuming both his body and the dozens of blank or scratched up sheets of paper he had crumbled in frustration by now.

 

That thought was enough for him to just press the send button, deciding that if he was already in the pits of hell, it couldn’t get worse anyway.

 

_From: Kyungsoo_

_‘As if you don’t use the same excuse every time you go into needy project partner mode.’_

 

He blinked while reading over the other’s reply, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. Was he being that obvious? Or was the other only teasing him back? Why hadn’t he even denied the fact that it was an excuse? Or the fact that he was asking Baekhyun out on a date? He hadn’t denied it at all and it was the first time Baekhyun had ever pronounced the word _date_ to Kyungsoo but he had expected the other to shut him off quickly.

 

Confusion once again flooded him in a loud, thunderous cacophony and he sighed, seeing that thick, red line between them again. They were toeing over it. It would be easy to cross it. Kyungsoo might be leaving him an opening. 

 

However, Baekhyun had never been courageous.

 

_To: Kyungsoo_

_‘when should we meet up?’_

 

Fortunately, Kyungsoo didn’t really leave him the occasion to dwell on their conversation more, asking him to come to the amusement park immediately if he could and Baekhyun had never really denied anything to Kyungsoo so it took him less than half an hour to shower and get ready and less than half an hour more to reach the amusement park by taking the crowded subway and walking for a few minutes.

 

He usually didn’t like going to the amusement park because it was a bit far from where he lived and he never really liked taking the subway for a long time but as soon as he laid his gaze on Kyungsoo waiting for him there, dressed in a plain white shirt and blue jeans, his hair unruly on top of his head, and his smile brighter than the Spring sun shining down on them, Baekhyun suddenly heard a song in his head, one about being able to go to the other side of the world for the person you loved.

 

"You’re late," were the words he greeted Baekhyun with, even if there was no real reproach in his voice.

 

"The subway was crowded," he shrugged, gaze trailing around. "Looks like this place is crowded too."

 

It was the middle of the afternoon so it shouldn’t really be too surprising but they were still just standing at the entrance of the amusement park, right in front of the colorful and welcoming gates, and yet, there was a lot of people surrounding them, people who were going into the park, some who were leaving it, and others who were also standing in front of the gates like they were, probably waiting for their friends to show up. He could already hear the music oozing out of the place, the hit songs played on each of the attractions, and the laughter of small children and people who were older but still had a child’s soul in their heart.

 

"You could hold my hand if you’re scared of getting lost in the crowd," Kyungsoo said, rather seriously and Baekhyun’s breath hitched in surprise before the other spoke again. "But if you ever get lost, just stay where you are and ask the adults around you for help."

 

"Very funny," Baekhyun snorted, narrowing his eyes at a very amused Kyungsoo who laughed softly, shaking his head as if he wasn’t the one who had just talked to Baekhyun as if he were a small child scared of getting engulfed by the crowd.

 

"Let’s just go in," Kyungsoo said, motioning Baekhyun to follow him as he started walking towards the entrance.

 

"I didn’t really take you for the amusement park kind of guy," he said, almost out of habit since he blurted out what kind of guy he thought Kyungsoo was at least once a day to the other. 

 

"This isn’t for me, this is for you. Maybe you’ll find your muse around here," Kyungsoo smiled at him, all cheeks and heart-shaped lips and Baekhyun couldn’t help but think that it would be hard to look around for inspiration when he could hardly take his eyes off Kyungsoo.

 

However, he also felt a bit bad for forcing Kyungsoo to hang out with him just because he was struggling with the lyrics of their song.  He didn’t want to think about it though, maybe he just needed to forget all about it for a couple hours and what better way to do that than to follow Kyungsoo around?

 

"What’s your favorite ride?" he asked instead, stepping closer to Kyungsoo as a little boy ran right past him to catch up to his parents, his eyes still taking in his surroundings. He hadn’t been here in a long time and it was almost refreshing, the noise, the happiness, the laughter, and all the little magical characters splattered on each attraction’s board.

 

"I don’t have anything I specially like but I prefer the more thrilling ones," Kyungsoo replied, smiling politely at a man who was almost screaming into his microphone on the little booth that they walked past, bragging about all the gifts you could win if you managed to score a good enough point on his game.

 

"The thrilling ones?" Baekhyun couldn’t help but repeat in surprise, looking at the other instead of where he was walking which caused him to almost walk right into a group of friends that were stopped in the middle of the path.

 

That didn’t happen, however, because he felt a warm hand pressing against the small of his back, pulling him closer to Kyungsoo and preventing him from walking into a stranger or worse, embarrassingly falling down on the floor. His hand was small, not too big, but it was warm and it lingered on Baekhyun’s back for a bit longer than necessary, until Kyungsoo deemed it safe enough to let go of him so he could walk on his own. Baekhyun felt warmth spreading through his chest, his heart suddenly jumping around as if it was scared of getting burned by the small flames fluttering in his ribcage.

 

"Yeah, like the pendulum thing or the big rollercoaster. Why? Don’t you like them?" Kyungsoo asked and it wasn’t difficult for Baekhyun to hear the teasing lilts of his voice even if it was noisy around them.

 

"No, I don’t mind. They’re cool," he confidently lied even if he could feel his stomach churning anxiously just at the thought of being tied to a seat and dropped from the air, miles and miles above the ground. 

 

"You actually do look like the kind of guy who’d prefer the bumper cars or the ferris wheel," the other hummed and usually his low voice would send shudders down Baekhyun’s body but this time he simply snorted as if what he was saying was unbelievable.

 

It kind of was unbelievable. The Ferris Wheel was one of the best rides in every single amusement park and the way Kyungsoo was criticizing it through those words was unbelievable. He’d never say that out loud though.

 

"I’m not," he frowned. "I really like rollercoasters!"

 

"Really? We’ll ride that big one later then," Kyungsoo smirked, pointing to the ride in question. He could see a small part of it from where they were and when he saw the wagons fall down along the rails, he couldn’t help but swallow down loudly.

 

"Oh, look!" he suddenly said instead of replying to the other, gesturing towards his left. "There’s a little shop that sells accessories, it’s a must for amusement parks," he mumbled, grabbing the other’s wrist and dragging him in before even leaving him the occasion to say anything. Hopefully, Kyungsoo would forget all about the rollercoaster in a while.

 

"Are you a child?" he heard Kyungsoo laugh behind him, throwing him a halfhearted glare over his shoulder as they stepped into the little shop before immediately dragging him towards the small aisle full of hair accessories.

 

"Are you an old, boring man?" he threw back at him only once they stopped in front of the aisle, his eyes taking in all the colorful accessories. It was a must for him. Where was the fun in hanging out at an amusement park if you didn’t look half cute and half ridiculous while walking around? 

 

He finally noticed that he was still gripping onto the other’s wrist and immediately let go, not even looking at him and trying to brush it off by bringing his hand up to examine a few accessories.

 

"Everyone was wearing some outside," he went on to defend himself while looking at the various options. They had animal themed accessories, cat ears, sparkling and of all colors, small furry dog ears, Mickey Mouse themed ones, and even a few with red, devil horns that he had seen a lot outside, it seemed to be rather popular. 

 

"Which ones do you want?" he heard Kyungsoo ask.

 

"I’m not sure," he hummed softly, examining one with round mouse ears that seemed to light up when you pressed on a button. 

 

"I think this one would suit you," Kyungsoo said and he turned to look at him but instantly froze when the other was standing closer to him than he thought.

 

He seemed to have stepped towards him and before Baekhyun could even question him, Kyungsoo stretched his arms up, allowing him to catch a glimpse of white and light pink before all he could focus on was the other’s face, his handsome features, his doe eyes, the slope of his small nose, and the pinkish cushions that formed his lips. He spent a few seconds like that, adjusting the hairband on Baekhyun’s head while the latter stood completely still, silently praying to all the gods he knew that Kyungsoo wouldn’t hear the frantic beating of his heart.

 

Eventually, he took a step back, his lips stretching into a wide smile and Baekhyun found himself moving a single inch closer to follow, the want to press his lips against that beautiful, soft, heart shaped smile before he was filled with mortification at the realization of what he was doing and instantly froze again. Relief flooded him when he realized that Kyungsoo hadn’t noticed what he had almost done, too busy observing the hairband he had placed on Baekhyun’s head by himself. 

 

So that was the kind of boyfriend Kyungsoo was, he couldn’t help but think, a soft, almost enjoyable kind of ache spreading through his chest at the thought before he finally got a grip of himself and playfully narrowed his eyes, or at least tried to since his heart was still beating too loudly for him to properly function.

 

"You were mocking me for being a child a second ago but now you put it on me yourself," he reproached to the other, letting his voice curl between them teasingly even if the ache in his chest almost made it sound like a windy caress, breathy, almost inaudible.

 

"You look cute," Kyungsoo suddenly said instead and he wondered if love was an actual heart disease and if there was a way to cure it because he was practically sure that he’d one day die of a heart attack at this rate. However, when he looked at the lopsided, playful smile on Kyungsoo’s lips, he wasn’t sure if he actually wanted to be cured. "Like a kid."

 

He snorted. 

 

"Thanks to your height, you look like a kid too. You don’t even need… bunny ears," he chuckled softly on his last two words after finally catching a glimpse of himself in the small, rectangular mirror fixed in the middle of the aisle.

 

Kyungsoo had chosen big, white and slightly pink bunny ears for him. They stood on his head, somehow going along well with his silver strands and matching with the light pink shirt he had chosen to wear today. Maybe that was the reason why Kyungsoo had chosen it for him, or maybe it was because Baekhyun kind of suited that hairband. Kyungsoo himself had said that he was cute. If he ignored the words that followed those, at least.

 

"You have nice tastes," he chuckled softly, his fingers playing with the bunny ears for a bit before he finally turned to the other, meeting his sparkling gaze instantly, as if he had already been looking at Baekhyun. 

 

"I guess I do," Kyungsoo said, his gaze trailing up to the hairband once before it quickly traveled down, as if he was observing the whole of Baekhyun. Or maybe that was once again his delusion speaking. Either way, he felt his heart do that flutter thing that almost felt like a swoon and he instantly turned back to the aisle, looking away from Kyungsoo.

 

"I think this one would look good on you," he said after clearing his throat, picking up the first black cat eared hairband he could see and presenting it to Kyungsoo who frowned.

 

"You want me to wear one too?"

 

"Of course, what’s the point if only I wear it?" he snorted, an amused smile spreading on his lips.

 

"I don’t want to, I’ll look ridiculous," the other groaned, stepping away from Baekhyun as if he was scared the latter would do the same thing he did and just plant the hairband on his head suddenly.

 

"You’ll look cute." Baekhyun rolled his eyes just to spite the other, his amused smile growing wider when Kyungsoo frowned further. "You just got into grumpy cat mode so it’ll be perfect on you."

 

"No," the other shook his head firmly.

 

"Come on," he insisted, voice taking on a whiny turn as he stepped closer to the other. "Don’t be a  killjoy."

 

"They’ll fall off while we’re on the rides though," Kyungsoo said, as if he had thought about it a lot to find an excuse.

 

"They won’t," Baekhyun snorted. "Come on, you can just take yours off after we take a picture and I’ll just buy one for myself."

 

Kyungsoo looked at him for a few blank seconds before sighing and giving him a small, yielding smile.

 

"Fine, just one picture."

 

That was all Baekhyun needed to hear to grin in delight and immediately take his phone out, throwing his arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulder and pressing the side of their heads together as he smiled at the camera. They ended up taking more than just one picture and after the fifth one, Baekhyun had to force Kyungsoo to take a different pose than just smiling at the camera rather soullessly but the latter didn’t really seem to mind because he did as told, awkwardly but insanely endearingly nonetheless. Baekhyun voiced that thought out and received a pinch on his arm as a result but Kyungsoo still paid for his hairband afterwards, ignoring him when he tried telling him that he could pay for his own.

 

Baekhyun wore it proudly once they were out of the shop and he didn’t waste a single second before dragging Kyungsoo all around, his hand constantly wrapped around the other’s first in order to make sure they wouldn’t get separated in the crowd. Neither he nor Kyungsoo minded and he barely even noticed it as they spent the whole afternoon going from ride to ride, starting with the bumper cars where he laughed his heart out when Kyungsoo chased him all around the track after he had bumped into him too harshly once, resulting in the other taking his revenge numerous times afterwards. He had stomach cramps by the time they were out of that ride but he still couldn't stop laughing, Kyungsoo’s lower voice dancing in the air to accompany his and lingering in his mind where he kept the amused and delightful notes of his laughter, like a recorder. 

 

They went around a few more rides, each of them paying for the tickets on intervals which was maybe a bit stupid since they could both just pay for their own tickets but it was okay like that too and they didn’t mind. Kyungsoo insisted that they went into the Haunted House and Baekhyun hadn’t been able to deny, not wanting the other to see that he was scared of it even if all his bravado vanished as soon as they stepped in, walking through the dark hallways splattered with fake spider webs, distorted and ugly dummies, green, red, or other dark substances, the frightening mood enhanced by the bone-chilling sound effects. He had screamed a few times, probably more than he’d ever admit, but Kyungsoo had laughed through it all, screaming each time a scary dummy surged in front of them only to immediacy laugh afterwards, both mocking Baekhyun and enjoying the atmosphere. Baekhyun had probably cursed at him a few times as he hadn’t really been in full control of himself but Kyungsoo hadn’t minded, letting Baekhyun cling to his arm and hide behind him even if he laughed at him.

 

He hadn’t realized but by the time they had been out of the Haunted House, their hands were tangled and it remained that way for the rest of the afternoon instead of Baekhyun gripping Kyungsoo’s wrist and dragging him around. They went through a few more rides before Baekhyun stopped at a booth where you had to shoot a precise number of balloons in order to win prizes ranging from plushies to game consoles. He had always liked this kind of things and somehow, Kyungsoo had decided that he would win him a bunny plushie to _match his stupid hairband._ It hadn’t really worked, however, as Kyungsoo had not brought his glasses and wasn’t wearing contact lenses either so he had a difficult time actually aiming properly. It didn’t matter though, because despite mocking him about it for a bit, Baekhyun took matters into hand and managed to score a prize instead, aiming way better than Kyungsoo had and even impressing him. He supposed all that time spent playing war games on his computer had turned out to be useful and when he gave Kyungsoo the small but cute puppy he had won, the other had stared at the plushie for a few seconds before smiling at him and Baekhyun almost had the urge to go and win a few more plushies to see that smile again. He didn’t have to, however, because Kyungsoo kept smiling at him through the whole afternoon anyway and Baekhyun couldn’t take his eyes off him even when they had walked away from the booth and their hands had found each other again.

 

However, the fun had ended soon for Baekhyun when Kyungsoo had remembered that they were supposed to ride the big rollercoaster and he hadn’t been able to refuse despite already yielding to the other for the Haunted House. He couldn’t help but wonder if Kyungsoo was doing this on purpose, to get some kind of revenge on Baekhyun but he didn’t even know why the other would do that either. 

 

Either way, the rollercoaster had been a nightmare, he had probably almost broken Kyungsoo’s fingers by squeezing his hand too hard while spending most of the ride with his eyes squeezed shut, laughing at himself whenever he wasn’t screaming in panic, urged on by Kyungsoo’s loud laughter beside him. His throat was a little sore by the time they got off and the first thing he had done was kneel on the floor and savor the blessing of being on the ground and not up in the air, fastened into a wagon that kept going up and down without ever giving him the guarantee of not crashing on the floor. He had survived though, even if he was hit by nausea for a few minutes after getting off it. Kyungsoo’s hand gently rubbing his back in apology despite not being able to scratch the amused smile off his lips while observing Baekhyun made things a bit more bearable and at least, he hadn’t complained too much when Baekhyun had forced him to buy him cotton candy to make up for almost losing his life afterwards.

 

They had eaten it slowly, Baekhyun’s upset stomach and nausea forgotten as soon the fluffy sweet melted in his mouth. Kyungsoo didn’t really like cotton candy as much, he focused on fumbling with the plushie Baekhyun had won for him more than on the pink cloud waiting to be eaten and when Baekhyun had questioned him about it, he simply shrugged and told him he didn’t like sweet things that much. That had almost been a blessing for Baekhyun because it meant that he could also eat Kyungsoo’s after finishing his cotton candy and even if his stomach had felt a bit too full afterwards, it had been worth it, especially since Kyungsoo laughed at him each time he took a bite after complaining about not being able to finish it, his whole face scrunching up, his eyes disappearing into slits, and his teeth showing as he laughed freely. Baekhyun always tried shoving a piece of cotton candy into his mouth whenever he laughed like that, mainly to make him stop before his heart exploded but after a few times refusing, Kyungsoo finally had accepted eating it, only to bite Baekhyun’s fingers as he fed him. That had effectively stopped Baekhyun from trying again.

 

They had decided to go home after that, tired and still high on happiness as they silently sat inside Kyungsoo’s car while the latter drove Baekhyun home. It was a rare occasion for Kyungsoo to travel by car as it was much easier to just walk everywhere or take the subway or even the bus but he had told Baekhyun that he had taken it because he knew they would go home late and he didn’t want to ruin the last of their day in overcrowded subway wagons. Baekhyun had told him that he could’ve also picked him up to spare him the trouble earlier but Kyungsoo had shrugged, a teasing smile on his lips as he told Baekhyun he had wanted him to earn the blessing of spending an afternoon with him at the amusement park.

 

It was silent now as they sat in the car, but not the awkward kind of silence, they were just comfortably traveling, the radio turned on loud enough for them to hum along to the music but low enough for them to hear each other properly if one of them were to say something. Baekhyun forced himself to look right in front of him at the passing cars and the few people on the streets instead of staring at Kyungsoo as he thought back on the few hours they had just spent together. It had been nice, really nice. Kyungsoo had been really nice and he was always nice but it almost felt like he was a bit less teasing and playful today, as if he had genuinely just focused on having fun with Baekhyun and making sure that the latter would be comfortable. They had held hands and Baekhyun could still feel the ghost of Kyungsoo’s warm fingers between his but none of them had said anything about it, not when they had been walking together in the middle of the crowd that they had barely even paid attention to nor now, when it was silent and the perfect occasion to talk about all the unsaid things and the small hints that they had both dropped without any of them acting on it properly.

 

It had been nice. A bit too nice. It had almost felt like a real date. Had it been a real date? He hoped that it had been in Kyungsoo’s eyes too because everything that they had done had fitted the experience of a young, pure love Kyungsoo had wanted him to taste. He had gotten a taste of it with Kyungsoo, once again, without even intending to do so and now, he wondered if he would ever be able to erase it all from his memory and see Kyungsoo as an ordinary friend when they had acted like way more than friends for the whole afternoon. However, he supposed he had stopped seeing Kyungsoo as an ordinary friend a long time ago anyway.

 

He could feel that now familiar ache in his chest again and now, as Kyungsoo’s low voice hummed along to the bright, joyful melody on the radio, Baekhyun could finally put a name on that ache. It was yearning. He was yearning for more. He was yearning to hold Kyungsoo’s hand, to kiss Kyungsoo’s lips, to fit himself into Kyungsoo’s embrace, to nuzzle against his chest, to cradle him in his arms in the middle of the night, and to wake up with the other’s smile greeting him in the morning, a sight that would solely belong to him for the rest of his day, week, month, for the rest of forever. 

 

Forever. Was that how it would feel to share a forever with Kyungsoo?

 

Before he could dwell on his own thoughts more, he felt the car coming to a stop and when he took a proper look around, they were parked in front of his apartment complex. The light on the window of their living room, on the third floor of the building, was on. Jongdae would probably attack him with questions as soon as he’d step in, asking how his date had been or if they had gotten to third base yet because _it’s been ages and I’m sick of seeing you mope around the house so pitifully just fucking confess already, you dumbass._

 

The radio was still the only source of noise in the car for a few seconds and Baekhyun finally allowed himself to look at Kyungsoo, his gaze drowning in those beautiful dark orbs almost instantly as their eyes met. It was dark outside already and the streetlights were drawing gentle shadows over Kyungsoo’s face, enhancing the slope of his nose and luring Baekhyun’s gaze to the dip of his upper lip. Those lips had been humming to a bright song only seconds before. Kyungsoo listened to a  few of Baekhyun’s song recommendations now, the same way Baekhyun had asked Kyungsoo to recommend him some of his favorite ballads weeks ago.

 

He looked back up into the other’s eyes. Kyungsoo hadn’t looked away, maybe he had noticed where Baekhyun’s gaze had been. He made no comment, only looking back at Baekhyun in utter silence for a few seconds during which Baekhyun felt it again, that _something_ between them, that thing that had always been there, like a breath shared between them, like the gentle tickle of the wind, or maybe like the way Baekhyun’s heart always felt alive whenever Kyungsoo was near. That _something_ filled with unsaid things and cowardice.

 

"I had fun." Kyungsoo was the first one to break the silence, his voice low, warm, caressing Baekhyun’s ears like gentle feathers, seeping into his mind like a hummed melody, settling there and never leaving again. 

 

He could feel his heart beating hard without any special reason, he could feel it, in his chest, in his temples, even on his fingertips. He discreetly took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down but he didn’t even know why he was suddenly like this. It reminded him of the lyrics of a song Jongdae had written last year, about your heart aching, about yearning, about not being able to help it, about being flustered without any reason. A song he had titled _First Love_.

 

"I had a lot of fun too, it was really nice," he replied, curving his lips into a  genuine smile. It had been one of the best afternoons of his life, maybe the best date of his life as well.

 

"I’m glad then," Kyungsoo replied and it wasn’t awkward, neither of them were awkward but Baekhyun could feel it, the way their words weren’t what they actually wanted to say. Before he could say anything else, however, Kyungsoo looked away from him, taking a deep breath. "I hope it helped inspire you a bit for our song."

 

"Maybe it did," Baekhyun replied absentmindedly, his gaze trailing over Kyungsoo’s side profile, taking in the way his black strands had gotten a bit longer than the first day they had met, the way all the stars missing in the sky seemed to have found refuge in those doe eyes that felt as wide as the sky whenever Baekhyun got lost in them. He took in the gentle slope of his nose, the two, pinkish cushions of his lips and he could feel it, the _ache._

 

"Do you think you could finish it for next week?" Kyungsoo asked, looking back at him again, one of his hands resting on his thigh while the other was still gripping the steering wheel, as if out of habit. Baekhyun liked how he looked while driving.

 

"Next week?" he repeated, furrowing his eyebrows the slightest bit.

 

Kyungsoo hummed softly. "So we can rehearse it properly and then record it during the last few days before the deadline."

 

"I’ll try," Baekhyun sighed, teeth gently sinking into his lower lip as worry filled him up at once. He couldn’t disappoint Kyungsoo, not now, not ever.

 

The other seemed to have sensed his discomfort because the next thing he said was pronounced with an ever gentler voice.

 

"I know you want to do this part of the project on your own but if you need help, you should just ask, Baekhyun," he said, no trace of reproach or disappointment in his voice, just plain worry that washed over Baekhyun like a refreshing wave in the middle of a scalding hot summer afternoon.

 

"It’s okay, I’ll manage," he replied, shaking his head as a light smile lingered on his lips. Kyungsoo was always so caring, despite his appearance.

 

"You’re so stubborn," the other sighed, fondness mixing in with the worry in his voice as his lips quirked up a little.

 

Baekhyun simply grinned at him, shrugging obnoxiously because he knew he was but this was his battle, this was his way of changing himself and he would do it. He would manage to do it, all on his own, and Kyungsoo might have helped him with a lot of things, but Baekhyun wasn’t going to let him write those lyrics for him. It would feel as though he was exploiting the other and he did not want Kyungsoo to ever get that thought.

 

The song on the radio changed to the slower, more drawled out beat of an R&B song and silence settled over them again, their eyes locked together for a few seconds before Kyungsoo’s gaze dropped lower and Baekhyun felt his breath hitching. However, the other simply curved his lips into a smile and stretched his hand out.

 

"You have a bit of cotton candy left on your lip," he explained as his fingers cupped Baekhyun’s jaw, spreading over his skin like feathers warmed up by the afternoon sun before his thumb gently brushed over the corner of Baekhyun’s lips.

 

He had whispered those words, as if was already focused on Baekhyun’s lips, and he was closer now, leaning towards Baekhyun whose eyes never once left Kyungsoo’s face, lost in those two drops of universe that were themselves lost on his lips. His touch was warm, gentle against Baekhyun’s skin and the brush of his thumb over the corner of his lips was feathery light, almost as if he thought Baekhyun was too fragile to be treated any other way than with utter care, as if Baekhyun was one of those white keys back in Kyungsoo’s studio. He always caressed the keyboard with his fingertips while playing, as if it was his most cherished possession, as if he knew the only way to make a gentle melody was to be gentle with your instrument. There was a soft smile on Kyungsoo’s lips, the same one he always had on whenever he played his favorite song to Baekhyun at the end of a few hours spent arranging their own song.

 

It took a few seconds for Kyungsoo’s gaze to meet his again and Baekhyun found himself lost, once again. Utterly lost. Though, it was a nice feeling because even if he was lost, the glint in Kyungsoo’s eyes was a familiar one and he knew nothing would happen to him, nothing bad, nothing painful, he wouldn’t lose himself, he just had to give himself away in order to take in return. His heart clenched a bit, a tiny needle of fear seemingly piercing the air between them because Kyungsoo seemed to finally notice that a few seconds had passed since he had wiped away the trace of cotton candy left on Baekhyun’s lips and he finally pulled away, his fingertips brushing over Baekhyun’s skin a last time as he took his hand away and let it drop on his thigh again.

 

"You’re like a kid," he said, whispered, voice quiet, maybe a bit trembly, hopefully a little trembly. 

 

Baekhyun too a deep breath, letting all the air out again in a soft chuckle. He had heard that sentence so many times coming from Kyungsoo.

 

"In that case, you’re great at taking care of kids," he replied mischievously, heart still beating crazily in his chest as if it wanted to push him forward and right into Kyungsoo’s arms. He didn’t let it dictate him, however, observing the other before accidentally blurting his thoughts out again. "You do seem to be the kind of boyfriend people would want to settle down with and have like ten kids."

 

Kyungsoo blinked at him in surprise for a few blank seconds before bursting into a light fit of chuckles, pushing Baekhyun to realize what he had just said, embarrassment instantly filling him up. He was almost used to it now though, and Kyungsoo seemed to be too because he quickly took a grip of himself and gave Baekhyun that look again, that fond look that was a mixture of amusement and curiosity, that one look that always made Baekhyun’s heart race harder, if that was even possible.

 

"If I gathered all your random comments about what kind of boyfriend I seem to be, I’d sound like the perfect boyfriend," the other quirked an amused eyebrow, voice teasing Baekhyun and sending a shiver down his spine. Why did Kyungsoo’s voice always turn deeper at random times?

 

"Maybe you just want to think you’re the perfect boyfriend in my eyes," he shrugged, not losing his playful smile.

 

"Alright," Kyungsoo chuckled quietly, shaking his head. "Just go home and sleep right away so you can dream about what kind of boyfriend you think I am without bothering me."

 

"Looks like you’re experienced in dreaming about what kind of boyfriend people are," he retorted, obnoxiously wiggling his eyebrows in that way he knew always made Kyungsoo cringe.

 

"Just shut up," the other, as expected, cringed, scrunching his nose in distaste.

 

"Now, that’s rude," Baekhyun singsonged, shaking his head in mock disapproval at the same time. "A rude person most of the time means a shitty boyfriend."

 

"Just go before I start thinking that you’re definitely the kind of boyfriend who needs to be kissed in order to shut up."

 

As soon as those words left Kyungsoo’s lips, Baekhyun effectively fell silent, surprise slowly taking over the amusement bubbling inside of him. That _something_ settled between them again, like a constant companion, like a lost ghost, or maybe like the music constantly beating in Baekhyun’s chest. It was there, and as he watched while Kyungsoo’s gaze slowly dropped down his eyes to somewhere a bit lower, he finally realized what that _something_ was. His own gaze couldn't help but follow the same path, dropping lower, all at once, unable to stop, just the way Baekhyun hadn’t been able to stop himself from falling for Kyungsoo. It landed on the other’s lips and he could still feel it, the ghost of those lips against his, the strong arms around his waist, the soft cushions moving against his mouth, the small taste of Forever he had yearned to immerse himself in again ever since that first day he had gotten a glimpse of it.

 

He could name it now. He could figure out what had always been between them apart from that thick, red line neither of them was brave enough to cross. It was nothing but attraction, a pull, a push, a stronger pull, yearning, want, desire, and Forever. A bit of Forever. The start of Forever only waiting for them to dive in and trace it up until the end. Love? Maybe there was a little bit of that too.

 

Before he even realized it, Baekhyun started feeling a gentle breath brushing against his lips, that familiar scent that he couldn’t describe with anything else but _Kyungsoo_ wrapping all around him, seeping into him and almost taking control over him as the inches separating them started fading away. The only thing he could hear was his heart racing against his ribcage, the only thing he could feel was the deep, painful need to just dive in, to just let himself go and press his lips against Kyungsoo’s, his eyes slowly fluttering shut. It would be easy to do it. It would be easy to seal the start of their own little Forever and every single inch of Baekhyun’s soul was aching for him to do it.

 

However, their Forever ended even before it could start when Kyungsoo abruptly pulled away, just when their lips were a breath away from pressing together.

 

Baekhyun felt himself falling but it didn’t feel nice this time. His eyes snapped open, his heart dropped into his stomach and the ache in his soul worsened, spreading into his veins like a poison kept cold by disappointment. He took a deep, shaky breath in.

 

Kyungsoo had pulled away, settling back on his seat properly, gaze locked on the steering wheel, both of his hands now gripping it tightly, knuckles fading into white against black as if it took everything in him to stay that way, away from Baekhyun. His gaze never once moved away from where it was safely locked in and amidst the pain of rejection overwhelming him, Baekhyun’s head started swarming with all kinds of thoughts. Why had he pulled away? Had he read everything wrong? Had he really imagined everything between them? Had he turned into one of those stupidly weak people singing about a love never returned? Had he misunderstood everything? Did Kyungsoo actually really put up with him for the sake of their project? Did he hate Baekhyun?

 

However, Kyungsoo finally glanced at him, for a single, short second before looking away almost instantly. It hadn’t been quick enough though, because all it took was that tiny moment for Baekhyun to understand and catch on the small, unfamiliar glint in Kyungsoo’s eyes as he had looked at him. It was that same glint Baekhyun had seen in the mirror for the first time a few weeks ago, when his heart had first started doing weird things and he couldn’t understand and it was all unfamiliar and he wanted it to stop.

 

Fear. 

 

It had been fear in Kyungsoo’s eyes and all of a sudden, Baekhyun remembered. He understood.

 

Baekhyun had always been scared of getting his heart broken for the first time but Kyungsoo was scared of getting his heart broken a second time. Baekhyun had always been scared of breaking Kyungsoo’s heart but Kyungsoo was afraid at the mere idea of letting anyone near enough to break his heart a second time. There were already small cracks in it, painful scars that he had already talked to Baekhyun about, the same day he had explained what Forever was to him.

 

Kyungsoo was scared, way more scared than Baekhyun could ever be and it all suddenly made sense. It took ten long silent seconds but soon, the disappointment and the pain diminished until Baekhyun could ignore them and curve his lips into a gentle, saddened smile even if Kyungsoo still refused to look at him. It didn’t matter because Baekhyun understood him now. He had been selfish all this time but he knew now. It all started making sense, everything, the small accusing words about Baekhyun breaking people’s heart, the way Kyungsoo was always looking at him as he was trying to figure him out, the emotion with which he had almost pleaded Baekhyun to stop playing with people’s feelings and giving them hope, and the three days Kyungsoo had spent ignoring him. He had simply tried pulling himself away at that time, he had tried distracting himself with movies and his best friend, he had probably tried stopping himself and seeking advice only to give up and just let everything flow naturally until this exact moment.

 

It was painful, it made Baekhyun feel like the most stupid and the most selfish person on earth. He had never tried to understand Kyungsoo for real, he had always simply focused on his own side of the story and on his own feelings. However, he understood now and he did the best thing to do at the moment even if that same ache was still there in his chest, sucking him in and pushing him out at the same time. Just like Kyungsoo was doing to him. Just like he had been doing to Kyungsoo. For such similar reasons without either of them knowing it. 

 

"Goodnight," he eventually whispered, watching as that single word seemed to startle Kyungsoo out of his thoughts but wasn’t enough to give him the courage to look at Baekhyun, nor to reply.

 

Baekhyun simply unbuckled his seatbelt, looking at Kyungsoo a last time before finally getting out of the car and not glancing back even once as he made his way into his apartment, the fresh night air clearing his head the slightest bit until he reached inside the building.

 

That night was yet another sleepless one but it wasn’t spent in frustration or fear, it was spent with his back hunched over his desk, his fingers rapidly scribbling on a blank sheet of paper that was starting to get filled with lyrics, gentle lyrics that he spent most of the night on, head filled with nothing but doe eyes, heart-shaped smiles, and a shared Forever.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yet another week and a few more days were spent that way, with Baekhyun perfecting his lyrics as much as he could, rewriting them over and over again until he was completely satisfied with them while simultaneously trying to study as much as he could for the finals that would now start on Monday. Those few days were spent away from Kyungsoo who had been the first one to send him a message on the morning following their date without receiving any reply in return. He had been persistent for around four days, sending Baekhyun messages to ask if he was okay, what he was doing, and where he was but Baekhyun never replied as he didn’t want to make the same mistake as ever by simply going back to their odd friendship while ignoring what had almost happened between them that night, in Kyungsoo’s car.

 

This time, Kyungsoo didn’t directly come to his apartment to see him, he simply gave up on messaging Baekhyun and the latter felt sorry for doing this to him but that was the only way he could completely focus on what he wanted to do. Because things had to be done. One of them had to do it.

 

It hadn’t felt entirely nice to wake up every day of his time spent away from Kyungsoo without immediately sending the latter a message, it felt weird not to go to their usual coffee shop to study for exams, and it felt entirely unnatural not to see Kyungsoo for such a long time. It was as if Baekhyun was missing something but he supposed he had managed to survive thanks to the dreams haunting him every night, dreams of heart-shaped lips and hesitant eyes.

 

It took him exactly a week to finish the lyrics and when he had read over them a last time, Baekhyun had felt a bit odd. They were lyrics entirely about love, something he had never written about before and most of them had been written the night of their date, a burst of inspiration keeping him up all night as he had poured his heart into paper. Maybe he wasn’t entirely satisfied with them, maybe he thought that they could be better but that was what he thought about every single song he’d ever written and those lyrics, they were the first ones to ever come from the deepest part of his heart. They were meaningful, they had an owner, just like his heart did.

 

Maybe completely ignoring Kyungsoo hadn’t been the best thing to do either, not for more than a week at least, but Baekhyun knew that they both needed to step away from each other a little to realize things. Maybe if Kyungsoo was away from him for a little while, he could win over his fears. Maybe Baekhyun had managed to win over his own fears while writing their song.

 

It had been a bit difficult to avoid the other altogether and more than once did he have to ridiculously hide behind Jongdae while they were at school, or worse, change his course and end up late to class only because he wanted to make sure Kyungsoo wouldn’t see him in the hallways he had to cross to reach his classroom. It had been a bit difficult and Baekhyun had missed Kyungsoo more than ever in the span of those few days, maybe it was because he finally knew that his feelings were reciprocated even if some nights, he still couldn’t help but have some doubts. They had almost kissed though, Kyungsoo had initiated it and he might have also been the one to put a stop to it before it could even happen but he had wanted it and that was all that mattered. Fear had been the only thing to come between them.

 

And fear was still there, hanging off Baekhyun’s neck, wrapped all around him, holding his rapidly beating heart between its claws as he stood in front of Kyungsoo’s door, his hand raised up so he could ring the bell but finger merely hovering over it for the past minute. He had been so confident last night when he had decided that it was finally the right moment to share his lyrics with Kyungsoo, to put an end to the distance he had imposed on them on his own, but as he stood there, so close to what he had yearned for a while, he couldn’t ignore the sudden wave of hesitation and doubt washing over him and seeping into his lungs, rendering him unable to breath properly. He had planned this since the night of their date, he had already known he would only see Kyungsoo again once he’d have gotten rid of his fears and finished their song but it had seemed much easier back then than it actually was. 

 

So many things could go wrong. What if Kyungsoo was angry at him? He had ignored him for almost ten full days, after all, and right after they had almost kissed, nonetheless. What if the other took it as a rejection and the reason why he hadn’t kept messaging Baekhyun or came to find him on his own was because he was upset, or worse, thought that Baekhyun was upset with him. What if Kyungsoo had actually already moved on? Baekhyun wasn’t confident enough to know for sure that he wasn’t an easy person to move on from. Even now, he wasn’t even confident enough to know for sure that Kyungsoo was into him as much as he was. What if he had read everything wrong? What if he had misunderstood everything? What if Kyungsoo hated him? What if he didn’t like Baekhyun’s lyrics or even Baekhyun himself? What if he was about to get his heart broken beyond repair?

 

Baekhyun knew that if Kyungsoo broke his heart, he would never get back on his feet. Not when he loved Kyungsoo so much. His whole being ached with just the thought of ruining everything between them, his heart screaming in pain at the thought, his lungs closing in on themselves and refusing to let him breath, his legs trembling as if they wanted to take him far away from the danger, and his head begging him to think, to think properly and not make a mistake.

 

However, Baekhyun was done being a coward who hid behind a confident and playful façade. If his heart would get broken, then at least it would be by Kyungsoo’s hands. If his soul would be sliced into two, then at least he would have no regrets. If Kyungsoo didn’t want him, then at least he’d know and he’d stop deluding himself and hoping for things that would never come true. At least, he would’ve done something other than toeing over a line and glancing to the other side without ever being brave enough to cross over.

 

With those thoughts in mind, Baekhyun suddenly pushed his finger forward, jabbing the doorbell a bit too hard and immediately taking a deep breath as he waited.

 

It didn’t take too long for the door to open and when it did, Kyungsoo was standing in front of him, wide eyes filling up with surprise as soon as he realized that Baekhyun was the one standing in front of him. The latter curved his lips into what he hoped was a convincing smile, his heart still beating anxiously in his chest and his stomach churning as Kyungsoo stood there for a few silent seconds.

 

More than a week had passed since they had last seen each other properly but Kyungsoo hadn’t changed. Baekhyun didn’t even know why he had expected the other to change but he was pleased to see that he had’t, his hair was still the same dark color, his eyebrows were still adorably bushy, and his eyes were still wide as he looked at Baekhyun as if he couldn’t see anyone else. However, he didn’t offer Baekhyun his heart shaped smile.

 

"What are you doing here?" were the first words he pronounced with his eyebrows furrowed.

 

"Now, that’s not a way to treat your most precious guest. I haven’t even stepped into your house and you already want to kick me out," Baekhyun forced himself to say playfully albeit he heard his own voice shake a bit in nervousness. Or maybe it was because of the small pinch he felt in his heart. Kyungsoo looked upset.

 

And it would’ve been understandable if the other decided to just slam the door shut at his face and never ever talk to Baekhyun again but that wasn’t what Kyungsoo did. He simply looked at Baekhyun for a few silent seconds, observing him, not laughing at his words like he usually would, simply observing him as if he was still, after all this time, trying to figure him out. Baekhyun let him do so, never once losing his smile as he watched Kyungsoo’s features gradually soften until he let out a small sigh and stepped back, opening the door wider in a silent sign that he would let Baekhyun in. The latter unconsciously relaxed, only then noticing that his whole body had been tied up by tension before relief worked its way into the knots and freed him. He stepped in, glancing at Kyungsoo once before heading towards the living room, Kyungsoo following him from behind.

 

It had only been ten days and yet Baekhyun realized that he had missed this place. It hadn’t changed. It was still warm and welcoming. He could still see his memories play out wherever he looked. Silently, he simply plopped down on the couch, the way he knew Kyungsoo didn’t like, and looked at the latter. Kyungsoo was standing in front of him, the coffee table separating them as he looked over at Baekhyun, a frown staining his handsome features again as he crossed his arms over his chest. A few silent seconds passed like that and Baekhyun didn’t know what to say, disliking the slightly awkward and heavy tension coursing between them as their eyes locked.

 

"I’m glad you finally managed to remember that I exist," were the accusing words Kyungsoo threw at him after a while, his voice low and calm but snapping in the air like the crack of thunder.

 

"I’m sorry," Baekhyun immediately apologized, voice filled with sincerity and regret as he patted the spot next to him, inviting Kyungsoo to sit next to him when this was Kyungsoo’s house, Kyungsoo’s couch, Kyungsoo’s everything. He didn’t move a single inch, looking at Baekhyun with that faintly angry expression, eyebrows and lips pulled into a frown that Baekhyun had never seen before. 

 

"You’re sorry," Kyungsoo repeated blankly and this wasn’t that bad because it at least meant that Kyungsoo was angry, that he was affected by this, that he was upset about Baekhyun suddenly disappearing, that he cared. 

 

However, he also didn’t like being on the receiving end of such emotions. He didn’t like the thought of hurting Kyungsoo. He didn’t like how selfish he actually had been with this whole ordeal, the fact that he had imposed this on Kyungsoo. Though, had this been just a normal friendship, Kyungsoo wouldn’t have reacted this way either, right?

 

"I just…" he started before taking a deep breath in and shrugging a bit, avoiding Kyungsoo’s gaze. "I just needing a bit of time, I guess," he continued, glancing at Kyungsoo to see his features softening, his lips pressing into a straight line as guilt made its way into his eyes. Baekhyun shook his head, smiling at the other. He didn’t want Kyungsoo to think this had happened because of their almost-kiss. "I also needed to completely focus on studying, finals start on Monday and I guess I didn’t want any distraction."

 

"Baekhyun," Kyungsoo sighed, running a hand through his hair in what seemed to be frustration before he looked at the other hesitantly. "If this happened because of-"

 

"I finished our song," Baekhyun cut him off before he could finish his sentence, words almost crashing together as he had spoken too quickly.

 

He didn’t want Kyungsoo to feel guilty, he didn’t want him to breach that subject either. That wasn’t how it was supposed to happen.

 

"What?" Kyungsoo said, surprise obvious in his voice.

 

"Our song," he repeated, curving his lips into a more genuine, proud smile. "I finally wrote the lyrics. I’m done."

 

"And you couldn’t have at least just messaged me to say that?" Kyungsoo snapped, Baekhyun’s smile falling as a result. "I was worried the whole fucking week because I heard nothing from you and the deadline’s Wednesday. I thought maybe you bailed out because you couldn’t write the lyrics, or maybe I pressured you too much about them that day, or that it was because we-"

 

"I’m sorry," Baekhyun apologized again. Kyungsoo was right. It hadn’t been the best decision Baekhyun had ever taken, it had been rather stupid of him even. "But I finished the lyrics right in time, didn’t I? We’re not late so it’s okay," he continued nervously, really hoping that he hadn’t been the one to ruin everything between them.

 

"You didn’t even show me. What if we have to make some modifications and we don’t manage to finish it all up for Wednesday?" Kyungsoo retorted but it was softer this time, as if his anger was slowly washing off the more he spoke to Baekhyun. He liked to think that it was exactly what happened. Kyungsoo could never stay too angry at him, even when Baekhyun spent long minutes doing everything he could just to tick him off and tease him.

 

"We won’t have to change anything as long as you like the lyrics," Baekhyun reassured the other, confidence slowly crawling back in now that Kyungsoo didn’t look like he wanted to punch a hole through his face.

 

"How the hell do you know?" Kyungsoo grumbled, quirking an eyebrow.

 

"They fit the melody perfectly and I even practiced singing them along to the recording you sent me a few weeks ago," he said, grinning as if he was proud of himself, which was kind of the case despite everything.

 

"You’re such a pain in the ass," Kyungsoo groaned, rubbing a hand over his face in frustration but seemingly giving up on taking the argument further. Relief flooded Baekhyun once again and he was glad that Kyungsoo wouldn’t make a big deal out of things even if he probably should.

 

"I’m pretty sure I can be something much more pleasant than a pain in the ass," Baekhyun couldn’t help but say, wiggling his eyebrows obnoxiously in that way that always either made Kyungsoo cringe or laugh out loud.

 

This time, it was nothing more than a snort that left behind the trace of an amused but yielding smile on Kyungsoo’s face and that might not be enough to tame down the nervousness coursing through Baekhyun’s veins but it was enough to make his heart swoon like it always did whenever Kyungsoo was near him. The snort soon turned into soft laughter when Kyungsoo looked at him again though and Baekhyun took the occasion to bat his eyelashes innocently, giving the other a rendition of a kicked puppy by completing the look with a pout as well. He probably looked ridiculous since Kyungsoo laughed softly but Baekhyun didn’t mind, he couldn’t focus on anything but his favorite song, the soothing melody that flowed out of Kyungsoo’s mouth and pooled all around him, wrapping around his body like a warm cocoon made out of sun-kissed feathers and colorful silky petals.

 

He burst into laughter along with the other, his heart suddenly too big and too small for his chest at the same time, clenching into itself, growing, jumping around like a crazed animal only to dance around like a feather locked in the embrace of a summer breeze all at once. Maybe he could write a song about this, later. Maybe Kyungsoo could sing it for him.

 

"I’m at least glad you’re okay," Kyungsoo said when they both calmed down and those words were enough for Baekhyun to wish the table between them would disappear so he could simply jump into Kyungsoo’s arms and maybe never let go. He had pretty great self-control skills fortunately, however.

 

"Why, were you worried about me?" he asked, drawling his question out teasingly even though his heart jumped around in his chest in joy. It felt nice to know that someone cared enough to worry about you, maybe even miss you when you spent a few days away from them. He liked this feeling. It didn’t feel scary anymore, not as much.

 

"Of course," Kyungsoo immediately replied, without any hesitation and Baekhyun’s breath hitched in surprise before cutting off completely when the playful, lopsided smile he liked so much spread on Kyungsoo’s lips. "You’re a kid who can’t be left alone for too long, after all."

 

He had missed this. This playful banter that they continuously had going on, these hidden meanings, this push and pull. He had missed it so much but somehow, he knew that he could have so much more than this. They could have something so much more sure and lasting.

 

"Maybe you think I’m a kid because you like taking care of me too much," he still replied nonetheless and Kyungsoo’s smile grew a bit softer, silence settling in for a few seconds during which Baekhyun couldn’t help but mirror the handsome curve of his lips.

 

"Well," Kyungsoo then changed the subject as if he had just remembered something. "Aren’t you going to show me those lyrics?"

 

The calm and pleasant feeling that had settled over Baekhyun quickly vanished with those words, leaving behind nothing but a new flame of nervousness that almost felt like a song stuck in his head, one that he could ignore for a bit if he could focus on something else before it only grew even louder in his head, calling for his attention. 

 

He sat up a bit, straightening his back as he looked up at Kyungsoo with hesitant eyes. The other looked a bit intimidating now, with an impatient expression on his face even if it was nothing negative. Maybe it was because he was still up on his feet while Baekhyun was still nestled on the couch.

 

"I thought it would be better if I could just sing it for you," he said, clearing his throat halfway into his sentence when his voice cracked a little bit. 

 

"You want to sing it?" Kyungsoo furrowed his eyebrows in what appeared to be confusion before shrugging it off. "Alright, I’ll just go fetch my guitar then."

 

As soon as Kyungsoo disappeared into the hallway leading to his small studio room, Baekhyun took a deep breath in, shoulders dropping as he leaned back into the couch and slid down a little while exhaling all the air filling up his lungs. His heart was beating too fast. He had half the desire to just stop everything and run away. This could end up being really lame. He could get his heart broken.

 

However, a few seconds later, Kyungsoo walked into the living room again, acoustic guitar in hand and all of Baekhyun’s doubts somehow multiplied and vanished at the same time. Kyungsoo had always had a sort of soothing effect on Baekhyun, maybe it was because of his low, velvety voice that just sounded like a lullaby no matter what he used it for, maybe it was because of how he always, always stared at Baekhyun whenever they were talking and somehow managed to prevent him from moving around too much just with the force of his gaze, or maybe it was because he made Baekhyun feel comfortable and whole despite their many differences. He didn’t really know, maybe he would never ever know but then again, it didn’t matter.

 

It didn’t matter because Baekhyun didn’t need to understand in order to know that he wanted this.

 

He did his best to put his nerves aside, ignoring them, shoving them at the back of his head the same way he used to skip love songs whenever they somehow made their way into his playlist. He moved a bit as Kyungsoo approached, leaving him room to settle on the couch with his guitar and putting some distance between them. Baekhyun didn’t really trust himself right now, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do and maybe it was also for his own safety. It would be easier to run out of the room if he sat on this side of the couch.

 

"Alright," Kyungsoo said when he settled properly, fingers strumming over the strings a few times to check whether the instrument was tuned or not. It was. It always was. "I guess I’ll just play and listen while you sing?" 

 

"Yep," Baekhyun nodded, popping the word out the way he did whenever he was nervous.

 

Kyungsoo threw him a last confused glance and it was almost funny, the way he could read Baekhyun properly now, the way he could probably tell that something was wrong, that Baekhyun was more nervous about this than he should be. He still chose not to say anything about it, however, and that was probably because he could also tell that this was important to Baekhyun, he couldn’t understand it yet but he knew it was important.

 

Before Baekhyun could dwell on those last thoughts, a playful and familiar melody lifted around them, filing the room up, drowning out any other kind of sounds and reigning over them as if it belonged right there, between them. Kyungsoo still looked as good as ever while playing the guitar, Baekhyun still couldn’t take his eyes off the way his fingers strummed the strings in a way that showed he had done this a thousand times before, his eyes falling shut the first few seconds of the song as he immersed himself into it, a small smile spreading on his lips as he played. He always treated his instruments with care, as if they were his only companions, as if the small brush of a finger on ivory keys or strings hid secrets shared over hundreds of lonely nights, as if they were his most precious possession, as if he loved them deeply enough to fear even scratching them with his own fingers. It looked painfully similar to the way his fingers had brushed over Baekhyun’s lower lip to swipe a trace of cotton candy away that night, his fingertips brushing over his skin so gently it almost felt like silk warmed up under the sun.

 

Baekhyun missed that feeling. He wanted to feel it again and so, he parted his lips and sung the song he had hidden deep inside of his heart all along, revealing it to no one but the person who had created the melody that beat in his heart without any rest.

 

_Stay for tonight_

_If you want to_

_I can show you_

_What my dreams are made of,_

_As I'm dreaming of your face_

 

His voice was a bit trembling at first and he cursed himself inwardly only to calm down a bit as soon as he opened his eyes and let his gaze land on Kyungsoo’s relaxed features, his closed eyes, the eyebrows he dreamed of tracing with his fingertips every single morning, the small nose that he sometimes felt the urge to press his lips against whenever Kyungsoo cringed at something embarrassing he said, and those plushy lips he wouldn’t mind resting his own lips against even in a half-asleep state, right before he let dreams take over his mind.

 

_I've been away for a long time_

_Such a long time_

_And I miss you there_

_I can't imagine being anywhere else_

_I can't imagine being anywhere else but here_

 

Kyungsoo kept his eyes closed but the smile on his lips spread further over his face, as if he was taking in the lyrics, as if he was hearing them in his own mind, as if he was listening to his favorite song. Baekhyun hoped that this would one day become Kyungsoo’s favorite song, their song, a happier one, one that balanced the both of them. The thought somehow helped him gain a bit of confidence and his voice was stronger between them.

 

He hoped it would become Kyungsoo’s favorite song because he couldn’t imagine himself singing it to anyone else. 

 

_How the hell did we end up like this?_

_You bring out the beast in me_

_I fell in love from the moment we kissed_

_Since then we've been history_

 

Baekhyun’s voice flowed freely between them, dancing around in the air with joy, notes twirling around in a happy dance that Kyungsoo might not be able to see but that he could certainly feel, before they gently caressed the other’s ears, no trace of hesitance, as if they had found their fated person. Baekhyun had wondered a lot when exactly it had happened, this thing. This odd thing called love that he had ran away from for such a long time that he finally had grown tired of it and had landed into Kyungsoo’s arms, tired and worn out until the other shaped him back. Maybe it had happened when their lips had embraced each other in a daze for the first time. Maybe it had happened way before that. Baekhyun didn’t know.

 

He didn’t know but he was so glad it happened.

 

_They say that love is forever_

_Your forever is all that I need_

_Please stay as long as you need_

 

As those gentle lyrics reached Kyungsoo’s ears, and maybe his heart, the latter’s eyes suddenly snapped open, the reflection of beautiful sparkling stars on a soothing river greeting Baekhyun, the water a bit troubled with surprise and confusion. Baekhyun dived in nonetheless, shedding his fears and leaving them at the shore in order to freely let himself go and enjoy what he had always craved.

 

Had Kyungsoo recognized his own words? He hoped so.

 

_Can't promise that things won't be broken_

_But I swear that I will never leave_

_Please stay forever with me_

 

Their eyes locked together as Baekhyun sung his heart’s lyrics to Kyungsoo, a gentle smile spread on his lips because this was Kyungsoo and he had nothing to fear. This was Kyungsoo and even if they would break each other’s heart along the way, Baekhyun would never leave. It wouldn’t be avoidable, they were only human and they would inevitably hurt each other because that was just how relationships worked, Baekhyun could understand it now. It was completely stupid to lock himself away in fear of getting his heart broken or breaking Kyungsoo’s heart because they weren’t perfect but he knew he would make Kyungsoo happy despite the mistakes he might not be able to prevent no matter how hard he tried to. And wasn’t love about being there even in the worst moments and holding onto each other even through their flaws and mistakes? He’d always be here, fixing up the broken pieces of Kyungsoo’s heart himself even if he couldn’t promise that he wouldn’t break them a bit all over again. He’d handle it with the utmost care but he wouldn’t make promises he wouldn’t keep. It didn’t matter. It wouldn’t matter as long as Kyungsoo would be here to stick Baekhyun’s heart back together if he ever were to damage it too.

 

He continued singing and it didn’t feel like singing at all. It almost felt as if he was talking to Kyungsoo, opening his heart up for him, crossing a line, and confessing his deepest secrets to him. Kyungsoo remained silent even when he played a cord wrong. Baekhyun hoped he was flustered. Kyungsoo never played a cord wrong.

 

_And I can't fall asleep,_

_I lay in my bed awake at nights,_

_And I'll fall in love, you'll fall in love_

_It could mean everything, everything to me_

 

There was no fear in Kyungsoo’s eyes as he never once looked away from Baekhyun this time. There was no fear, only stars, gentle undulations, and hesitation mixed in with a few sprinkles of surprise. Baekhyun tried reassuring him, however, smiling genuinely, never once pulling his gaze away from his, singing from the deepest part of his heart, pouring every ounce of feeling he had into his voice. Maybe Kyungsoo would finally realize that this meant everything to him.

 

_They say that love is forever_

_Your forever is all that I need_

_They say that love is forever_

_Please stay forever with me_

 

The song softly died down, Baekhyun’s words hanging in the air for a second before Kyungsoo strummed on his guitar a last time, silence dancing around them to the echo of their song. Their eyes never once slid away from each other, however, they continued looking at each other, Baekhyun’s smile lingering on his lips, his soul oddly feeling lighter, and his heart still hammering like crazy in his chest. Kyungsoo kept silent, not looking away from Baekhyun, his fingers still pressed against the strings of his guitar even if the song had ended a few seconds ago.

 

And there it was again.

 

That feeling. That impression. As if time had stopped, as if the whole world had came to a standstill around them, as if the dust particles around them froze in the air, as if there was no one else but the both of them, there, looking at each other, breathing each other in, observing, taking in, accepting, and, hopefully loving.

 

It was that feeling. It was just like when they had kissed what seemed like a whole lifetime ago.

 

It was that.

 

Forever.

 

"It was really nice," a low voice finally broke the silence, Kyungsoo seemingly gathering the courage to speak first. His voice was a bit hoarse and he cleared his throat, gaze still not leaving Baekhyun’s, as if he was locked in. Or maybe he just didn’t want to look at anything else. "Those were really beautiful lyrics. How did you manage to come up with them in a week?"

 

"I had a Muse," was Baekhyun’s reply, his voice light, gentle, but nothing remotely close to playful when it usually would be. Usually, he would pronounce those words with a teasing smile, and a mischievous glint in his eyes but Baekhyun was tired of hiding behind a casual attitude and turning things he wished he could say confidently into jokes instead. "I actually got most of it done in a single night."

 

Maybe he was still not courageous enough to tell which night that was but maybe Kyungsoo knew him well enough to figure out what Baekhyun was exactly talking about. Maybe that was the reason why he finally looked away from Baekhyun to gently lay his guitar down on the coffee table in front of them. Baekhyun deflated for a second, disappointment and fear instantly crowding around his heart, like hungry predators ready to jump on their weakened prey any second now. 

 

However, before he could even start questioning himself and drawing all kinds of self-destructive conclusions from those few seconds Kyungsoo looked away from him, the latter turned to him again, catching his gaze. His eyes still had that glint of uncertainty in them but it was far dimmer than it had been when he had looked at Baekhyun that night, right after almost kissing him in the car.

 

 "That part about forever," he started, once again breaking the silence right before Baekhyun started thinking that he was actually really going to die of a heart attack. Instead, his breath hitched at those words, anticipation settling heavily on his chest and crushing his lungs a little bit. "It sounds familiar," he continued, the question hidden both underneath his words and in his eyes.

 

Baekhyun smiled. Maybe Kyungsoo was actually the child that couldn’t be left alone between them, maybe he was the little boy who needed reassurance more than Baekhyun did.

 

"I heard it from my muse, a long time ago," he replied softly, words almost getting lost in a whisper but seemingly reaching Kyungsoo’s ears because the latter sunk his teeth into his lower lip and Baekhyun’s gaze was inevitably drawn to it.

 

"Did you write this song for your Muse too?" Kyungsoo asked softly and it was Baekhyun’s first time seeing him like this, so hesitant, so small, so vulnerable-looking. It was a new side of Kyungsoo and unsurprisingly, Baekhyun added it to his long list of things he loved about the other.

 

"I did," he replied confidently, finally managing to drag his gaze away from Kyungsoo’s lips and into his eyes instead. They were sparkling more than usual, a bit darker as well at the same time, somehow, and Baekhyun couldn’t take it anymore so he parted his lips and spoke again. "Does he like it?"

 

Instead of a reply, Baekhyun found himself finally receiving something that he had craved for weeks, Kyungsoo’s soft, gentle lips pressing against his in a matter of second, in a blur that soon merged into a Forever that he found himself never wanting to leave again. His lips were as soft as he remembered them to be, as warm as he recalled, and they still fit perfectly against Baekhyun’s own lips, sighing into his mouth as if they were relieved of finally finding their owner. 

 

It didn’t last long because Baekhyun was impatient, a bit too selfish, and maybe a tad stupid but there were still a few words he couldn’t keep in anymore.

 

"I love you," he mumbled almost right against Kyungsoo’s lips, blurting those words out almost unconsciously but not regretting it a tad bit when he felt Kyungsoo’s lips blossoming into that heart shape against his.

 

And he had always thought that it would be difficult to pronounce those words, that it would be nothing but a sign of vulnerability, a sign of weakness and a key to danger. It wasn’t, though, it was nothing but honesty and the need to pronounce those words to the only person he would never be scared of gifting them to. Maybe that was all he had needed all along, someone who could simply take his hand and treat him with enough care for him not to fear saying it anymore.

 

"I love you too," the other chuckled, laughed, before kissing Baekhyun again and it was a bit messy, a bit too eager, maybe a bit too fast but it didn’t matter because Baekhyun would never get enough of it. He would never get enough of that feeling of Forever when he kissed Kyungsoo. 

 

Maybe he also would never get enough of those three little words that were returned to him so easily, in a single breath full of joy and honesty, as if Kyungsoo hadn’t been able to keep it. As if he had nestled those words deep inside of him for so long and finally, Baekhyun had managed to take his hand and treat him with enough care for him not to fear saying it anymore.

 

And it had been easy, a bit too easy, way easier than Baekhyun would’ve expected it but then again, why would it even have to be complicated when they’d been toeing around the line and dancing around each other, singing around each other for so long? He understood it then, what love songs were about, that feeling in his chest, his heart beating erratically as if it just wanted to jump out of him and scream his love for Kyungsoo by itself. He could understand now, the bliss of not only loving someone but being loved back in return, the way it made him feel so much better than seconds before Kyungsoo pronounced those words to him. He could taste it, the relief brought on by the knowledge that your heart belonged to someone, that your soul had finally found its twin, that your breath had a whole new purpose now. It wasn’t scary. Being in love wasn’t scary, it was the best feeling Baekhyun had ever been able to taste.

 

He could figure it out now, what all those love songs were about. They were about Kyungsoo, every single one of them.

 

Kyungsoo’s hand was warm as it cupped Baekhyun’s cheek and he was hit by the sudden yearning of pressing his hand against his so he did, because there was nothing stopping him anymore. He had won over his own fear and maybe Kyungsoo hadn’t completely been able to do it, still a bit hesitant in his every move, but they would eventually get there too. They would do it together. Baekhyun would be there to hold his hand through it all.

 

"You don’t know how long I’ve waited to be able to do this," Kyungsoo mumbled, his eyes diving into Baekhyun’s as they remained close to each other, sharing their breath and their heart and never letting their lips straying too far away from each other.

 

"Why didn’t you do it sooner then?" Baekhyun asked, thumb drawing gentle circles on the back of Kyungsoo’s hand, his other hand gently resting against Kyungsoo’s nape, fingertips dancing there in synch to the beat of his own heart.

 

It took Kyungsoo a few seconds to reply, he was simply observing Baekhyun for a few seconds, trying to figure him out still, maybe hesitating. Baekhyun promised himself to never make it difficult for Kyungsoo to read him.

 

"I guess I was a bit scared. Maybe I didn’t want to be another heart you’d accidentally break before discarding it," he eventually said, pulling Baekhyun’s lips into a small, saddened smile.

 

It didn’t matter though, because he would do his best until Kyungsoo would completely shed this image he had of him. Maybe it wouldn’t be easy but Baekhyun was willing to work hard for it. That wasn’t what he told Kyungsoo, however, because that wouldn’t be fun. Instead, he parted his lips and let his heart sing for the other.

 

_"Can’t promise that things won’t be broken, but I swear that I will never leave."_

 

Kyungsoo simply smiled, letting his eyes narrow into happy crescent, his cheeks glowing with happiness and bunching up in that adorable way, and offering his heart to Baekhyun through the curve of his smile. Maybe that had been exactly what he wanted to hear from Baekhyun, because why make a promise over something that was sometimes out of your control, a promise that you might not be able to keep, instead of promising to never leave even when pain would inevitably slide in-between them and try to separate them? Maybe Kyungsoo had the same thoughts. Maybe that was yet another one of their similarities.

 

Kyungsoo remained silent for a little more, gaze trailing over Baekhyun’s features fondly, maybe a bit in wonder, and Baekhyun basked in the attention, smiling at him before mischief made its way into his gaze and he sang the rest of the song to Kyungsoo, this time completely off-key, pulling laughter out of the other only seconds after the first screech left his mouth and he playfully murdered yet another song just to make the man he loved laugh in that beautiful way.

 

Eventually, Baekhyun shut up when Kyungsoo pressed his lips against his again after mumbling something that oddly sounded like ‘ _so you’re really the kind of boyfriend I’ll need to kiss in order to keep silent.’_

 

Maybe Baekhyun wouldn’t mind. Maybe it would only make him speak even more than usual.

 

However, he came to find out for the rest of the day that he didn’t need to speak too much to earn a kiss, Kyungsoo didn’t seem to be able to prevent himself from pressing their lips together anyway.

 

Maybe it actually worsened even more when Baekhyun handed him a paper sheet with the lyrics to their song written over it properly, along with the small note at the end that Kyungsoo stared at for a whole minute before stealing Baekhyun’s breath away again and locking him both in his arms and in their own little Forever.

 

_‘To my Muse, my First Love, and my Forever, Do Kyungsoo.’_


End file.
